How Often Do You Think About Therapy?

[Deleted member 35429]

I know a part of PTSD is having intrusive thoughts or obsessive thinking about the trauma. I'm finding that instead of obsessing about trauma these days I'm now constantly thinking about therapy. Does anyone else do this? How often do you think of your therapist and your therapy sessions?

 

[aut555]

Is this a good outcome for you? You aren't obsessing about the other "stuff". If you are thinking about therapy, doesn't that mean you are re-examining past occurrences and how this played out in your lifetime? But l could be way of base. I had nightmares, and this seems to happen despite how great the therapist is. So l have to take a break from therapy.

 

[Eagle3]

Dude, my whole life revolves around therapy right now. Its just about the only thing I have to think about besides trying to find work, not ruminating over how fat I'm getting sitting around at home, or whether or not I feel up to attending Martial Arts classes (my therapist teaches those, its part of my therapy). It is what it is, I'm getting lots of progress, and it keeps me from dropping into a suicidal depression since I'm back to living with a triggering situation. When I have work and more progress in therapy, I know the constant thoughts will dissipate on their own, when I'm ready. Right now, I need the stable connection to a person/situation, and my therapist is the only source right now. That will pass as I progress. And it will for you too. :-)

 

[watundah]

A LOT.
Hourly. Ok, many times an hour unless I am actively engaged in something. Like Eagle3 I am not working and am spending 3 hours a week in session and doing writing exercises and spend time here and read Google articles.pertinent to what we're working on...so...yeah.

 

[mrsps]

All the time.
My T is like the mother I never had. I miss her terribly which is a new thing for me as I have always been very independent and never attached to anyone to "miss them". When anything happens weather its good or bad the first person I want to tell is my T. I spend a lot of time thinking about her and our sessions. I hope it gets less over time as I worry about what will happen when I can no longer see her.

 

[BOAG]

For me it kind of comes and goes in cycles. I almost always have some kind of "homework ", so there's that. But sometimes I'm so busy with work/life, that therapy sessions go on the back burner a bit. Other times, depending on what comes up, if things are getting very intense, therapy may be all I think about. I'm thinking that's a fairly normal response.

 

[Sideways]

A lot. Like, a LOT. Too much. Urgh!

It beats thinking about the trauma itself, tends to be more productive. But I spend a lot of time actually in therapy throughout the week, so I'm finding it really important to close the door on the therapy thoughts and deliberately engage my head in other stuff during the day. I'm just going to crash and burn otherwise.

I do it like a thought diffusion exercise, which is kinda like a mindfulness thing. Thoughts about therapy show up (again), I notice them, remind myself that I'm working on something else right now, and I'll come back to the therapy thoughts when it's the right time. Don't fight them, just put them to the side.

Balance, for me, is so hard to get right. Finding the happy middle between riding the back seat in therapy (and getting nowhere fast), and waaaay overdoing it (leading to the crash and burn), is a constant work in progress. The amount of time I can "work on" my junk continually changes with my mood and life.

And while I'm continually butting up against that whole "let's get this over with" thing, it's actually rebuilding the rest of my life that's the important part, not the therapy or the trauma. Therapy is really just a tool to help facilitate that rebuilding process, so meaningful activities are really the key ingredient in my recovery rather than therapy per se.

 

[Hope1969]

A lot. I have convesations with my T in my head all day.
Sometimes I even fight with her in my head and sometimes I think she is the best - in my head :)
I guese its natural and it will reduce over time.

 

[Freedomfighter]

I know a part of PTSD is having intrusive thoughts or obsessive thinking about the trauma. I'm finding th...

Don't think that one could call that obsessive, since we are sick we tend to internalize trauma and therapy a lot. There are a lot of things I do not understand about the therapy and it leaves me angry and disappointed many times because I do not understand.
I guess I have always thought that therapy should only be positive, that it should not be painful and that I should not have to deal with bad people that remind me of my trauma, alas that is most likely not possible anyways because I chose a path in criminal justice so I know that I will be forced to deal with criminals anyways.
But I always hoped that therapy is like a protective enveloping blanket that keeps me away from pain but the direct opposite is the case and I do not like that, hate that and think that I should not have to go through that.

 

[Deleted member 35429]

Don't think that one could call that obsessive, since we are sick we tend to internalize trauma...

I find therapy to be a very tumultuous experience as well, lots of intensity and complex feelings. I think about it all the time. For me it feels obsessive, but maybe that's not quite a fair assessment. Thank you for your personal feedback on this!

 

[NightSky]

All the time. If I'm not going over our last session and analyzing it then I'm thinking and reading about all of the aspects of the therapeutic relationship that are so confusing to me that I'm always trying to navigate in a healthy way. The entire experience seems so unnatural and impossible to integrate into normal life. I go once a week and have been with my therapist for a year and a few months. I still don't understand how to go there every week and open up stuff that then causes symptoms all week, and NOT think about it a lot.

 

[watundah]

Given how screwed up "relationship" is for most of us, it makes sense that we're focused on, confused by, analytical of, this odd therapeutic relationship that's."all about me." It can be hard to take it in.

I want.to ask my T how she feels/what she thinks of me and am shy about it. I know her job is to say good things and she's not forthcoming with this info, but I feel like a pain in the ass and would like to hear differently. This is a big move for me!