Other Triggered By Trump

[hodge]

I am starting this thread as a specific place to discuss feelings about being triggered by Trump's words and actions. I know there's a political Trump thread and that's good for discussing the broader societal situation, but this is to discuss our emotional reactions to Trump and to hopefully share with each other ways to deal with this, because even though we only (!) have one more month to go and he is not likely to be elected, I suspect many of us will still be dealing with the fallout of his toxic effects long after this is over.

I've been triggered by Trump for months now. He reminds me of my narcissistic mother (who likes him). Now, with the release of the "Access Hollywood" video last night, he triggers me again in a new way because I was groped in the way he brags about doing it.

Does anyone else feel triggered by his words and/or actions? If so, how do you deal with it?

I have to spend the first minutes of therapy every week unloading about this. My T says she has lots of PTSD clients who feel the same way, as does she. She says we have all been getting worse because of Trump. She has no solution except riding this out and using my coping skills, which is a constant battle for me, since there's a new outrage from him almost every day on top of my own personal nightmares.

 

[eowynofrohan]

I am starting this thread as a specific place to discuss feelings about being triggered by Trump's words an...

I completely agree with this. Trump's actions, especially today, have extremely triggered me. I suffer PTSD from childhood sexual trauma, so I completely relate to being triggered by these words. Although I have not been to therapy in a while, I wouldn't be surprised if PTSD is getting worse from Trump.
Currently, I am dealing with it by taking his comments in healthy doses-not fixating on them, not thinking about it. I know this is repression and could be bad, but I do consume them-I just try not to allow it to consume me. (Which sometimes doesn't work, haha)
I also actively avoid a lot of news. I know who I'm voting for, so I stay out of the political spectrum. I don't watch debates, I don't watch the news if I can avoid it.
The worst part is waiting. We just have to wait until November, and hopefully this will be over soon.

 

[hodge]

I'm sorry you're going through this, too, @eowynofrohan. I also survived childhood sexual abuse as well as adult sexual abuse and other abuse. I'm having a really hard time communicating with my mother since she told me she's going to vote for him. It feels like a fundamental betrayal to me. She knows about some of the sexual abuse I've been through. But, then, she was the major emotional abuser to me since I was 11.

I limit my exposure to the news much of the time. But hubby is a political junkie and MSNBC is on our living room TV all day long. I want to know what's going on, and he lets me know if there's anything big happening, but often I avoid it, too.

I hope this will over soon, too. I am apprehensive, though, about what Trump supporters might do when he loses. He's managed to really rile them up, already suggesting this election will be rigged, etc. And a lot of these people have guns. It's scary.

I am venting to my therapist in email between appts., which she says is okay. That helps.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Does anyone else feel triggered by his words and/or actions? If so, how do you deal with it?

Yup, thats why I havent watched any news and cant watch the debate. He is this "big narc-like pushy mean" guy that reminds me of abusers.

God help me of he becomes President and I have to listen to him addressing the public.

I deal by not watching/hearing him but to read all of the politic stuff. I start to shake the min I hear his voice, I cant do it. Maybe that makes me weak, I dont know.

 

[hodge]

I don't think that makes you weak, @lostforgottensoul. I think it makes you a normal, feeling human being :-).

It took me about two hours to brace myself to watch his "apology" video last night. I know he isn't capable of a genuine apology because he's still who he was in 2005. But I finally did watch it and thought he looked like his head was going to explode. He looked completely furious at having to do this and could not mask his fury. I used to think he was just a sick narcissicist. Now I think he's also evil, though probably in a kind of unconscious way. I don't think he's capable of true self-reflection.

 

[hodge]

He is so like my mother. She refuses self-reflection. We've been to therapy together to more therapists than I can count since I was 15 or so. Every time the therapist looked at her and asked her what her issues were, she would quit. I'd keep going on my own. My grandparents were the nicest people, not only according to my childhood perception, but also according to my dad and my aunt, who were reliable sources. I have no idea if there's something in her childhood she refuses to deal with or if she just has a personality disorder. Either way, it's really hard for me to deal with communicating with her, especially during this election cycle.

 

[joeylittle]

I've moved this thread into the misc. trauma board, as it's about a very specific trigger/stressor.

 

[hodge]

Thanks, Joey. I just knew I wasn't posting it in the right forum, lol. I seem to be really mentally challenged in that way. But I know it's just me. Even when I was a professional editor/writer pre-PTSD, I had to ask for colleagues' input on categorizing things, as I can think of myriad ways almost anything can be categorized and always had a hard time making up my own mind :).

 

[ceruleanblue]

I've also been sexually assaulted in EXACTLY the way he specified in his tape, by a complete stranger. Hearing that last night was awful and basically, I have slept a whole ... couple of hours since.

He's been a nightmare to have to watch and deal with even though I don't have a television set. His mannerisms, his lack of logic, his arrogance and the sick, childish tantrums he throws are so much like my abusive ex that I feel physically sick watching anything with him in it. I cannot wait for this to be over, I want him to disappear.

The only bright side of this bizarre election is that it's validating to see so many other people disgusted by the same attitudes and traits that my ex used to make my life hell, if that makes any sense? I'm sorry to everyone else who's suffering through this.

 

[hodge]

There are plenty suffering along with you, hon. I'm afraid that's the only help I can provide, to just reassure you that you are so not alone and lots of us Americans are completely disgusted and fearful of him, also. And those of us who can are doing whatever possible to keep him from being elected. And, say what people may about Hillary, she's playing this exactly right, quietly letting him sink down to the nether levels on his own, which seems to be the one thing he is capable of doing.

 

[ceruleanblue]

Thanks. I had a feeling someone would put up a thread here. I'm glad it exists. I hope I can sleep tonight.

 

[hodge]

I hope you sleep well. Good dreams or no dreams :-)