On What Planet...

[Neverthesame]

@TreeHugger Haha!
I'd follow up with. "If you're a good boy all year. Next x-mas, you can have permanent chest hair removal." :D

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Apparently he's not concerned about infection, scarring, lack of sensation, leaking implants, general anaesthetic etc etc.

This.

I'd dump him, tell him to go look for a cavewoman to date instead.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

learn to think before he speaks!

but that's what he's thinking well he's shown his true colours, perhaps it will benefit anon, now she can kick him to the kerb!

 

[lostforgottensoul]

@C j, I think a ton of judgemental cruel hateful ridiclous distorted things i never say. I think its human to to a point so he may like big boobs but that doeant mean he doesnt like and enjoy Anon's body too. Most guys ive come across love big boobs and think with their penises so that was likely the smaller brain talking.

I dont think anon should dump him but a talk about keeping hurtful opinions to himself would be in order. Think before you speak is just that, think how the other(s) will feel/receive it if you say your thought.

 

[anonymous]

He didn't actually say he wasn't concerned about all those things. I guess they are the reasons I'd never considered implants.

Considering the fact that I'm 40 years old and have breastfed for a total of 2.5 years I thought my breasts were pretty good. I'm a 10C so not totally flat chested. Sure they're not as perky as they once were but - see above!

I just know if I raise it with him he'll tell me I'm being silly and it was just an off the cuff remark and I'm overthinking it and making a big deal out of nothing. But what woman wouldn't have it rolling around in her head?

 

[Deleted member 29920]

@lostforgottensoul, totally agree, but I would never even think of suggesting to a man to get penis enlargement..

I just think it was downright rude and insensitive of him and if he were my boyfriend / husband, he'd be gone. But that's just me.

 

[hodge]

Whoah, C cup? You definitely don't need implants, then. I'm an A cup. If anyone needs implants it's me, but damned if I'll do it. Hubby has never mentioned this and I'm not doing it.

 

[Neverthesame]

@lostforgottensoul Personally, I'd have a hard time not feeling "settled for". Sure, with alot of discussion and time, it could be worked out. But I would be feeling rather inadequate for a long time.

That was a really shitty thing for anon's guy to "suggest".

 

[lostforgottensoul]

I just know if I raise it with him he'll tell me I'm being silly and it was just an off the cuff remark and I'm overthinking it and making a big deal out of nothing.

Tell him it hurt your feelings. That you are self conscience about your body (if you are), breastfeed all of his children which child birth and breatsfeeding does a number on a woman's body, and that he should love what you already have and not want to change it.

Id also tell him it hurt you when he quickly says that but doesnt think about the risks and scars etc.

But also realize he is being a typical guy thinking with his penis. Not trying to make excuse for him, Ive just around MANY guys and all make off shot remarks like this that mean nothing. But it hurt you and you have a right to those feelings.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

That was a really shitty thing for anon's guy to "suggest".

Oh i agree fully with this. Just trying to put another spin on this or see it from another view is all. Certianly it was an uncalled for remark for sure, that would make me feel worse about my body.

 

[Suzetig]

Honestly it depends on how it was said. I've been with Mr Suzetig for over 20 years and I could see him making a "next on our list" comment as part of a joke or laugh about what people are prepared to do to their bodies - in fact I think we've joked in that way about Botox. It's safe because I know he's happy with me the way I am, we have a relationship where joking is pretty normal communication and neither of us have any desire to change the other.

I also know that my immediate response would have been to joke about hair implants or some such. I can't say it would have impacted the way I felt about my body at all. I know I'm out of step with popular opinion on this one but it just wouldn't have bothered me - there are other apparently harmless comments that would.

 

[Sideways]

Sure, maybe it was tongue in cheek and him having a ditzy "guy" moment.

But we're doing communication and boundaries at Trauma School (rolls eyes!), and my T would no doubt go for the assertive communication route to make sure that he realises what he did and why it's outta line. Like, "I felt unattractive and not good enough for you when you suggested I get implants. Even if it was a joke, it was hurtful, and I'd prefer it if you didn't suggest my body needs surgery in the future."

You're allowed to love your body, and in a really healthy relationship, boh parties know that both parties find the other physically attractive, yeah?