I want to thank everyone on this site, both Supporters and Sufferers, for sharing your experience, advice and encouragement. I especially want to thank the folks who are willing to call a spade a spade; it's one of the things I most enjoy about this site.
When I came here, I thought the problem was all him. What I'm learning (and I'm only beginning) is that I'm as much a part of the problem as I am a part of the solution.
When I came here, I thought the problem was all him. What I'm learning (and I'm only beginning) is that I'm as much a part of the problem as I am a part of the solution.
- Taking care of myself and letting him take care of himself, seemingly such simple but obvious advice, has worked wonders.
- I don't have to take on his struggles as my struggles. I have to keep the focus on me, especially when he's struggling most.
- I don't have to figure out how he should live his life. What I need to do is figure out how best to handle my life with the added stress of his PTSD impacting our relationship.
- When I stopped thinking I had all the answers and started listening to what you wonderful folks here had to say, I saw how he'd been telling me the same things I hear here. Now I'm much more able to understand and respect his needs.
- Reading thread after thread where the same issues I've been struggling with are addressed repeatedly shows me what he's going through isn't about me, it's about PTSD. Realizing that, I'm learning to take things much less personally.
- Folks here have really taken the time to explain boundaries to me--i.e. what they are, what to expect and how to set and maintain them. Boundaries have been a large part of me getting back to and maintaining my center.
- I'm imperfect and will continue to make mistakes. I'm seeing how patient he's been with me, as I find my way in beginning to understand how PTSD affects our relationship and to find practices that will bring us together rather than tearing us apart.
