"we" Hate The Feeling Of Abandonment

[Punky143]

Yup, it's engrained inside and we're aware why but, it doesn't make it easier. My T's email confirmed her absence of a week and it's not as if I'm necessarily going to need her but....we don't like change or when things are out of place. Adds to the chaos inside and outside of my head. And, I'm even more sad.

 

[One step at a time]

I also struggle with this every time my T has to reschedule, so I hear you and I'm sorry you also feel this way. Maybe take yourself out for coffee/tea this week, or do something else nice for yourself, if you can?
You will likely be okay. Your T still cares and will be back.
Sending support.

 

[Punky143]

Thank you for your kind words. Perhaps the most frustrating overall is a part of me knows she's returning, and its not that long. However, other parts ruminate on it which feeds all of the rest...

 

[Panda Bear]

It's tough when they take time away and boy do I get the the whole feeling of abandonment!

My T is always teaching me that I need other things to fill my time with, when he's not available. Friendships, self care, things I like to do. Go visit a friend, have coffee, grocery shop in peace(I have three kids) work on a project and such.

It does help distract me from the absence.

 

[Teamwork]

I got an email yesterday and today. Today he said and just a reminder that I will be away rest of December to January 2. Will be checking email occasionally but I am also going to get some calm for myself so we can get back to work in January. It made me feel like I was a source of his unrest. I actually still don't know what he means

 

[Panda Bear]

Think of it as a time for both of you to get some calm. A calm, well rested, self cared for therapist is a good one! When our Ts care for themselves, they are inadvertently caring for us too.

You're not causing him unrest, so try not to worry.

 

[Muted]

My T's email confirmed...

This is tough, seeing my T. and knowing she's here is a sense of security for me. One thing that has helped me is if possible my T. Let's me know way in advance. This helps me prepare. Do you think that would help you, if you knew in advance and had time to prepare?

 

[Teamwork]

Think of it as a time for both of you to get some calm. A calm, well rested, self cared for therapis...

Thanks that gives me perspective

 

[Punky143]

Im sure with the holiday approaching, that will occupy us with other crap. But its this never ending cluster of of depression and all its lovely symptoms that cease from being stopped....change in routine suck

 

[Rumors]

I think it shows us a good example of how to care for yourself properly. I go until I drop... I don't know how to take care of myself. Even when I am sick I continue to keep going... I hope you can learn from your therapists good example. It isn't a cause for you to feel guilty about, but instead celebrate that he will return ready to do good work!!

 

[Freedomfighter]

Yup, it's engrained inside and we're aware why but, it doesn't make it easier. My T's email confirmed...

That is an issue for me due to my childhood abuse. My father is the guilty one and as soon as a parent does not protect the child, but rather sexually abuses the child or lets others abuse the child then the parent is abandoning the child. I was also abused and abandonded by my ex. It is tough. It is really the therapist who has shown me for the first time in my life what it really means to stand by someone and to help them through thick and thin.

 

[All4thelove$]

Life is so vicious then its over im sure i dont understand your feelings but i feel your pain

words only seem to soothe the pain that they can not heal that they can cause

the way i see things is healing is never 100% & if it was would id be human in the end screams because i feel traped

sorry for the bad ending but never maybe lose hope like i have with losing my dad

last thing he did to me slam the phone on me and my mother and all the abuse is like my beautiful gift this xmas

sadly he died a few days later never telling me he loved me so this is the worst time in my life because my dad use to be my best friend the only person i feel ever loved me when i was young

i use to be very good looking and thats why he cared

for the most part im not mad but it sure does hurt

good luck punky open ur widow soon as the light comes up and soon as spring hits open it and you will see life is back the birds are chirping all is fine

i guess we need a way to just bring us back to the day we were happy as could be even tho it never happen

kinda a nice feeling comes over me love is sadness so is everything in life can have a tilt to that

hope you find some peace punky life still awaits you being happy tc you.