Dealing With Nudity And Sexual Content

[AllAtOnce]

Hi

Ive been going through anxiety attacks for years because of nudity and sexual content in films. I dont think its right for my SO to view films that have sexual content and nudity.

I feel like I will never find any man who understands my needs and is willing to sacrifice popular movies for me.

Last summer, I finally opened up to a close friend about my panic attacks and how hopeless I feel about finding a boyfriend willing to work with me. He told me that if movies (with SC and nudity) really make me feel that way then he would give up all of them: superhero movies, TV shows like Game of Thrones etc... He said, "They're just movies. You're a person whose life matters so much more".

Several months passed, slowly I started to seriously consider dating him.

Now, we've been together for a month. He gets upset and angry when I make comments like, "_________ told me to go see a new movie called __________. Apparently its really good! If it doesnt have SC or nudity, Id love to go see it".

My dear friend of nearly 7 years (and now boyfriend) went from saying he'd give up everything that hurts me to getting pissed at me for feeling hurt by movies.

Im back to having panic attacks and feeling like there is no one who could or would willing to meet my needs. And since SC and nudity can give me panick attacks that last for days, this isnt something I can just "get over".

I feel like no one understands and no one cares. Sometimes I think I should go tell a bunch of people so that I can find someone who understands. I dont though. I worry about what people would think.

 

[Friday]

And since SC and nudity can give me panick attacks that last for days, this isnt something I can just "get over".

Since this is under anxiety & panic attacks instead of relationships... Have you done any work on blunting/eliminating those triggers/stressors &/or shortening your reaction & recovery time to them?

 

[Silver.]

Hi there, do you have PTSD, or just the anxiety?

 

[AllAtOnce]

Since this is under anxiety & panic attacks instead of relationships... Have you done any work on blunti...

Ive tried a few things but I dont think I'll ever get rid of the anxiety. I dont care if other people watch that stuff, just when me or my boyfriend see it Im bothered by it.

I have the belief that my SO shouldnt be looking at other naked/scandalously-dressed women. I respect that other people might have different views but I feel like Im the only one who doesnt want my SO looking at other women.

My closest friend promised to protect my heart and then couldnt commit to it.

It makes me wonder if any man could make that sacrifice for me. I dont want to keep having these paick attacks and loneliness.

 

[AllAtOnce]

Hi there, do you have PTSD, or just the anxiety?

I dont know if I have PTSD. Ive never seen a professional.

Ive been through different types of traumas though, mostly in my childhood.

I wanted to post on this site because I need support and I know its a PTSD site and it might not be the perfect forum but I wanted to share this post anyway.

 

[Silver.]

I understand you need support, but having anxiety and having anxiety while having PTSD are two completely different things. It's a slap in the fact to us sufferers that you say "this isn't the perfect forum", because NO, it's not the perfect forum for you if you are just coming here for companionship. There are sites out there for anxiety sufferers.

 

[AllAtOnce]

I understand you need support, but having anxiety and having anxiety while having PTSD are two complete...

Wow...a slap in the face. Thats cruel. In a time like this when I feel like theres no one


Sometimes its better to say nothing.

 

[Muted]

Wow...a slap in the face. Thats cruel. In a time like this when I feel like theres no one


Sometimes...

I'm honored to reply to your post @AllAtOnce regardless of whether or not you have a confirmed diagnosis/label. I admit that I haven't read through all the rules, however, I think PTSD is more often than not undiagnosed and I don't recall any requirements of official proof of doctor's notes in order to be on this forum.

I could have written the same post (different circumstances) a year ago. Truly, I would have given anything to overcome this. I struggled with this constantly for over a decade.

I started EMDR for the third time almost two years ago and never targeted this specifically, however, all the things around this issue that would constantly trigger me all but went completely away. I can't explain it, but what a heavy burden gone. I do believe that deep down the core of this was somehow based on accepting myself and also working through some past trauma and betrayal.

However, there are men out there that have enough character and integrity to realize that that is a slippery path and are respectful enough to draw the line sooner than later. Your worth is far more than the temporary lustful satisfaction of an airbrushed image. If a man in your life doesn't recognize that, he doesn't even come close to deserving you.

 

[AllAtOnce]

I'm honored to reply to your post @AllAtOnce regardless of whether or not you have...

@Gia1019 Thank you. Your post warms my heart. Im so happy to hear that you found something that works. Ive never gone to therapy for my issues. But hearing that it helped someone who used to be in a similar situation gives me a deep sense of hope.

And...Ive suspected I have PTSD for years. Im not a very resilient person so even small traumas can make me develop anxiety triggers.

I was molested as a child and sexually assaulted a few times as a teenager. Im sorry if that's too personal. I was beat up, pinned down and had my hair ripped out by my older siblings during most of my childhood.

The traumas are certainly there. Triggers are there. Anxiety attacks are there. Depression..etc

But anyway, Im glad that therapy worked for you (someone in my situation). I feel less alone after hearing from you.

 

[Muted]

I have had trauma also since I was a young girl and don't remember officially getting diagnosed until recently. I think it may be common for a doctor to realize, but not say out loud officially 'you have PTSD '. I mean, how many of us request and read through our medical records?

I'm sorry for the pain you've been through, it's likely your far more resilient than you might believe.

You're free to choose what you share and I'm not offended in the least by it. We're here to help each other. Many posts are absolutely heartbreaking to read, but being isolated in our pain doesn't do anyone any good.

Our being able to support, bring understanding and help each other can give some purpose out from otherwise negative situations. I find it heartbreaking, but inspiring to read through what others have not only survived, but are fighting through. It gives me hope.

It truly makes my day that my experience in working through this has encouraged you. I'm glad you feel less alone and I hope and pray that you can receive the help you need to work through this. Your worth it!!!!!

 

[AllAtOnce]

I have had trauma also since I was a young girl and don't remember officially getting diagnosed until r...

Since Ive never gone, I think my hesitation with going to a doctor is that I dont want a diagnosis. I dont want anything bad on my record for mental health. I know thats silly because here in US schools and businesses dont have access to those records anyway.

So maybe I should go see someone about this.

What is it like? If you dont mind me asking

 

[Muted]

Since Ive never gone, I think my hesitation with going to a doctor is that I dont want a diagnosis. I...

I understand how you feel. Privacy is priceless.

What is what like?