I Don't Think My Therapist Is Very Good.

[Frogs88]

I'm in the UK, so when I started to feel the old symptoms of PTSD I made an appointment for counselling, and waited four months to hear back. Of course, within that four months I had lost my job and income, and my relationships were strained. I went for an assessment, they decided that I needed phobia therapy, I had to challenge this, as I have PTSD and the only thing I have ever found to be of help is EMDR.

My therapist, talks a lot, like... a lot... she repeats herself a lot.. and she doesn't really ask me any relevant questions, and she uses fifty words when one would suffice. I do not feel like she has any real grasp on the problem, and she just keeps giving me printed of nhs handouts, I've had PTSD for 14 years, I've read practically everything. Today was our forth session and I don't feel like she ahs any idea what so ever, she hasn't really asked me what's going on in my life, she doesn't have any grasp of my history and today when she said I seemed frustrated and asked me why I said I wanted to do EMDR she said 'but I thought PTSD wasn't the problem anymore, you're not having nightmares', well, I described all my symptoms and explained to her where they came from on the first session, she is just not understanding. It is true though, I don't have nightmares, I have flashes of images, noises, bodily sensations, panic that comes from seemingly nowhere, strange thought, self harm urges. I have been told that given my past this is CPTSD, this therapist, who has done pretty much nothing has just spent four weeks talking at me about things that don't seem relevant ... and she didn't even realize I have PTSD?

WTF?

Then there's the fact that she keeps trying to offload me, she wants to send me up to another more advanced service.. sounds great right? Except that once she has referred me to them, I get signed off the service I'm with... now the other service might decide not to pick me up, or they might not offer me any 1 to 1 sessions. I might end up getting less than I am getting now. I refused, I don't want to go another four months on a waiting this with no help. My doctor has asked her to cover me until the other service picks me up, but she's refused, apparently it doesn't work that way. She's seems very young and green. This morning she tired to assign me over to a multiple person stress help group (instead of the EMDR I've fought for and not yet received). I feel like she's just trying to off load me....

What's more, I saw her five minutes after session today, and I'm pretty sure she was crying...

I don't know what to do.

I'm not getting any help here. I called my doctor to ask for beta blockers for two weeks, but she wouldn't unless i'd talked to a psychologist.

I'm feeling so frustrated.

 

[Bristol]

I can totally understand your frustration, i can never work out whether the NHS dont care about mental health or whether they dont have the funding or what, there is this incredible black hole and postcode lottery in all of it. Unless the GP can put a plaster on it and tick it off they just dont seem interested. My GP told me i just needed to do more exercise to help lessen my anxiety with my notes sitting in front of her!

 

[Frogs88]

I know Bristol,1485, it is awful. The system is failing. Though I have to say, I do find exercise is good at getting me out my mind and into my body, but lots of days, that's really difficult. But still for that to be the only thing a GP suggests, that's ridiculous.

 

[Cactus Annie]

Hi this is my first time ever in a forum. I so appreciate you all. After reading what everyone here is going through I decided to join. Hope I'm doing this right. EDMR is mentioned and I believe you are referring to a type of therapy that is supposed to help almost immediately ?

 

[Frogs88]

Hi this is my first time ever in a forum. I so appreciate you all. After reading what everyone he...

Hi Cactus Annie, EMDR is a PTSD therapy I've had before, it doesn't work immediately, in my experience the symptoms get worse for a few weeks and then there's a break through, when I've worked on a trauma with it before there was a substantial long lasting effect, it is very tough in the first few weeks though, it's incredibly tiring, sometimes hidden memories come up, I have actually thrown up in sessions because I had scent memories come back really strongly, but, it was effective. I worked on it for a rape, and four months in I went on a date (before I had jumped at every touch for 4 years, I avoided all previously unknown men), two years later I'm still with him in a trusting relationship ( with sex, without triggers). So, It's something I recommend anybody looking into.

 

[Hopefully]

I'm in the UK, so when I started to feel the old symptoms of PTSD I made an appointment for counselling...

Blimey, it is so frustrating isn't it. I am sorry you are having to battle this as well as the issues that got you there in the first place. It is a bit of a lottery isn't it to what your borough/county provide. From my understanding, although it does differ it is always relatively short term therapy that is offered and it seems you don't get to choose what this and who it is with.

I would say if you are really unhappy with the service you are receiving you should complain. Bad therapy can be damaging, you need to look after yourself. In all the information you have been given are there any contact details for complaints or for the therapist lead clinician? You have every right to express how you feel, if you believe what you are receiving is sub-par, and as you have been in therapy before and know how it works, I would trust your instincts.

I don't know what brought you to therapy but I know the NHS doesn't offer long term therapy for many of the causes of PTSD like domestic violence or sexual abuse or violence, they like to refer you out to local services, that tend to be charities who offer more specific help. Needless to say, these services can be oversubscribed and have long waiting lists. I don't know if it is a cynical view to have but it does seem that they like to offer short term help to less complicated (if there is such a thing) problems so they can deliver results and present good statistics. If you are presenting more complex difficulties they like to refer on, so they can show that help was provided in that manner, you don't linger in their services not improving.

I am sorry you are feeling so frustrated, it is so hard to take on another problem when you are already struggling and then harder again to have to try and communicate your needs. Try and remember you know yourself best and you deserve good support.

 

[Suzetig]

I'm not getting any help here. I called my doctor to ask for beta blockers for two weeks, but she wouldn't unless i'd talked to a psychologist.

I don't understand this, beta blockers aren't psychoactive - they address the physical symptoms of anxiety, shaking, fast heart rate etc but don't act psychologically at all. Why would your GP want you to see a psychologist before prescribing a non-psychological drug? Mine will prescribe a beta blocker as a first medication when I have a symptom flare up. In your shoes I'd go back and ask why he needs you to see a psychologist to prescribe and argue from there. Is a beta blocker something that's worked for you before?

Your therapist may not be able to do the work with you - the NHS are notorious for banding staff and banding decides what issue they work with and how severe. The higher level services are also more likely to be able to offer specialisms abs longer term therapy.

In your therapists case her manager may be saying you need a therapist on the next level of service or she may not be trained in EMDR or, god forbid, think it's not the right thing for how your issues are presenting now. PTSD changes over a lifetime, can present like lots of other things and needs some level of assessment each time.

I understand your frustrations and honestly have taken myself out of the treatment lottery by paying for therapy privately.

Can you have an honest conversation with her about what you think you need and why she feels you need a higher level of care? Listen to what she's saying and consider whether her view has validity - my sense is your frustration is getting in the way here. There are many many effective therapies for PTSD - EMDR is one you've found effective, but it's often less so for complex trauma which can really benefit from a more relational approach. You're an expert in you, but your therapist has training and expertise too, I'm not saying you should blindly follow what she says but at the moment you seem to be dismissing her entirely.

I'm not sure what relevance her crying after session has - we all have our issues, and sometimes they mean we cry at work.

 

[Intrepid]

You're an Expert in you

I've stuck with therapists hoping they would change (sort of like my ex wife). They don't. Will it work sticking it out with this one? Can you ask for a parallel move to another therapist?

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Is it possible to go private pay with a therapist that does a sliding scale on payments? You sound like you know what you need and you seem very aware of the run around you are getting.

EMDR was the most effective for me. So I understand where you are coming from.

I am sad about all of the red tape and waiting and traps and pitfalls. I wish you the best in getting the appropriate treatment that you seek.

 

[Sandstone]

Can you back to the place you had EMDR last time?

I also know the frustration of trying to get the right level of care from the NHS. With persistence, I did eventually get 6 months with a really good psychologist, and she fought to get that extended to a year. That was with a higher level than the IAPT you can self refer to. I know the wait is horrendous, but if that is what it takes to get to the help we need, then it is the only way.

 

[Frogs88]

Thank you all for your support. I'm afraid private is not an option, I lost my last job due to PTSD, keep crying at interviews, and not allowed benefits, until something gets better I can't find work, but I can't get better until I get work ( can't even afford prescriptions at the moment). And I've not got family to help.

Anyways- sandstone - I am where I had EMDR, but not with the same therapist, I don't think they'll allow me the same therapist.

 

[Suzetig]

I lost my last job due to PTSD, keep crying at interviews, and not allowed benefits, until something gets better I can't find work, but I can't get better until I get work (

I understand you might not get ESA if they think you made yourself jobless but you should still be able to sign on which would cover your stamp duty and you should also get free prescriptions. Your doctor would surely give you a fit note saying you're too unwell to work which would tip you into sickness benefits?

Whereabouts in the UK are you? It would be work visiting your welfare rights officer to make sure you're getting all you're entitled to in terms of benefits etc.