Hi, I have CPTSD. My T told me this last Monday that he doesn't believe me about my life and wanted me to show him proof with pictures. I was so triggered and so sad and in complete shock. I went back Wednesday and showed him the proof. But now I just do not know how I will ever be able to freely talk about things with him, how can I trust him again? I am still sad and have been crying so much. I really like this T too and to think that he has been sitting there and not believing me hurts so much. Am I over reacting? Has anyone had this happen before to them?
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Therapist Doesn't Believe Me
- Post starter Renee
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Justmehere
Sponsor
What the heck?! That's terrible. I'm so sorry. Is this a therapist trained in treating trauma? To some degree, it really doesn't matter if the therapist believes the client about the trauma and it's really unprofessional to require proof of trauma.
Did he explain why he didn't believe you? How did he respond when you provided proof? Did he apologize?
I'd suggest perhaps one session to explain to him how this has affected your ability to trust him, and see if you and him can find a way to rebuild the relationship.
I have had T's say my story is unusual and I have been pretty convinced they don't believe me. Bit they never said it - they said my own self validation was the most important...
But if a T flat out said they thought it wasn't true, I'd be upset too.
Did he explain why he didn't believe you? How did he respond when you provided proof? Did he apologize?
I'd suggest perhaps one session to explain to him how this has affected your ability to trust him, and see if you and him can find a way to rebuild the relationship.
I have had T's say my story is unusual and I have been pretty convinced they don't believe me. Bit they never said it - they said my own self validation was the most important...
But if a T flat out said they thought it wasn't true, I'd be upset too.
Hi there Renee,
I actually literally joined this forum a few minutes ago, and I saw your post in the features list. ( I have been diagnosed with PTSD in 2016 )
I am so sorry this has happened to you. Him asking for "photos" of whatever it is , is absolutely inappropriate. I can't imagine any circumstance where such a question would be needed, unless legal, and that's for someone in court to see.
It doesn't happen often, but since therapists are humans too, they can get lost in their own ego and arrogance. I kind of feel like this may have taken place, because I don't feel like he's putting you on the same level (of respect). I'm studying psychology and if I ever do become a therapist I would never think to do what hes did.
If he really doesn't believe you, he could have asked in an appropriate way.
These situations are a leaf on our learning tree, to remember that other people don't determine our self worth, we do. I know it's hard, and it's worse when its a person of authority (I know from personal experience), but you'll feel empowered over time.
I haven't been through exactly what you have regarding the photos, but I do understand a professional not taking you seriously or not believing you.
When I was young, maybe 8 years back (total remission now , like another life time ) I took myself to the doctor and requested a referral form to get medical rebates so I could be treated for Anorexia Nervosa. The doctor laughed in my face and told me A.N isn't a mental illness, so I had to ring the medical rebate number myself, mid way in the illness where I was even lucky I would realise without heavy guidance. They profusely apologised even though it wasn't their fault, and then talked to the doctor, who reluctantly gave me the rebate form. I could clearly see that she was having some pretty serious cognitive dissonance and couldn't apologise.
When I ended up seeing a specialist for eating disorders, she face palmed over the story, given her whole career is about eating disorders.
Take care -
I actually literally joined this forum a few minutes ago, and I saw your post in the features list. ( I have been diagnosed with PTSD in 2016 )
I am so sorry this has happened to you. Him asking for "photos" of whatever it is , is absolutely inappropriate. I can't imagine any circumstance where such a question would be needed, unless legal, and that's for someone in court to see.
It doesn't happen often, but since therapists are humans too, they can get lost in their own ego and arrogance. I kind of feel like this may have taken place, because I don't feel like he's putting you on the same level (of respect). I'm studying psychology and if I ever do become a therapist I would never think to do what hes did.
If he really doesn't believe you, he could have asked in an appropriate way.
These situations are a leaf on our learning tree, to remember that other people don't determine our self worth, we do. I know it's hard, and it's worse when its a person of authority (I know from personal experience), but you'll feel empowered over time.
I haven't been through exactly what you have regarding the photos, but I do understand a professional not taking you seriously or not believing you.
When I was young, maybe 8 years back (total remission now , like another life time ) I took myself to the doctor and requested a referral form to get medical rebates so I could be treated for Anorexia Nervosa. The doctor laughed in my face and told me A.N isn't a mental illness, so I had to ring the medical rebate number myself, mid way in the illness where I was even lucky I would realise without heavy guidance. They profusely apologised even though it wasn't their fault, and then talked to the doctor, who reluctantly gave me the rebate form. I could clearly see that she was having some pretty serious cognitive dissonance and couldn't apologise.
When I ended up seeing a specialist for eating disorders, she face palmed over the story, given her whole career is about eating disorders.
Take care -
- Post starter
- #4
ashleechestin
New Here
I'm curious how long you have seen him... you indicated you like him and that he's been sitting there possibly not believing you which tells me you have seen him awhile? I wonder if that wasn't an exercise or a test ( not very nice one if so) but maybe to see how you are progressing or handling your trauma? If it were me I would ask a lot of questions about that as far as why he didn't believe u etc then I would b very honest about how that made me feel drudging up pictures etc and reliving your experience and I agree also with the other person who said it's really not a therapists job to believe you or question your facts as if ur on trial but to listen and give advice and suggestions on dealing with your problems .... anyway good luck for sure :)
- Post starter
- #7
- Post starter
- #8
I have been seeing him for 8 months.
lostforgottensoul
VIP Member
That's horrible! I'm sorry!
My theralist sort of cross examined me, asking the same questions many different ways to make sure my story was consistent as, I guess, making this shit up is a thing. But he has never asked for proof. And all the proof got burnt in a bonfire so I no long have proof.
Did you ask him why he didn't believe you and wanted pictures? Maybe he just miss understood?
I understand how you feel! I'm sorry! Being believed is a HUGE thing for me as NO ONE but my therapist believes me as it sounds made up and wish it were but its not. My entire family left my life because they think I made it all up. So I get that feeling and I am sure it is a millon times worse when a therapist doesn't believe you. :hug:s
My theralist sort of cross examined me, asking the same questions many different ways to make sure my story was consistent as, I guess, making this shit up is a thing. But he has never asked for proof. And all the proof got burnt in a bonfire so I no long have proof.
Did you ask him why he didn't believe you and wanted pictures? Maybe he just miss understood?
I understand how you feel! I'm sorry! Being believed is a HUGE thing for me as NO ONE but my therapist believes me as it sounds made up and wish it were but its not. My entire family left my life because they think I made it all up. So I get that feeling and I am sure it is a millon times worse when a therapist doesn't believe you. :hug:s
ashleechestin
New Here
Wow that is definitely enough time to establish a relationship. Hmm well I would really have what I would consider an exit appointment with him and basically explain how i feel regarding trust etc and depending on how that went and his response whether i wanted to see him again ... so sorry you have to deal with this what an annoyance
ashleechestin
New Here
You have every right to feel how you do... how you respond is going to affect your future progress in healing as everything that happens to us in life post trauma and how we respond is always so huge for us ... especially in therapy .... I'm sorry you feel sad ... maybe this is going to be a positive thing to open a door to a better fit for you in a therapist :) sounds like kind of a jerk if ya ask me lol seriously ... how condescending ...
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