Sufferer You Won't Believe Me

[whitefang]

Well... I've grown up with a very difficult and abusive family life. I am a twin and my brother has always been the Golden Child. My parents are very traditional and conservative and always looked down on me because I was a girl. They never encouraged me to learn or succeed and often called me stupid. My dad always had a short temper and would occasionally hit me - though my mum conveniently never remembers this happening.

I eventually left home and went to university, and my mother always seemed to resent me for going (she married and had us very young). Neither of them were very warm people and my mother would always try to control me and hold me back, telling me how to behave and even to dress. She had no emotional connection to anyone but always doted on my brother. Even if I shared similar traits, they were painted as negative when they related to me.

I'm now grown up, living in the city, with a humble but stable job. I have a boyfriend of 6 years, who admittedly I moved in with very quickly, having had to return post-uni to live with my mum. I've always tried to maintain a distant-but-civil relationship with both parents, even though my dad thought my university work was boring (he's only interested in motor racing) and my mum attempts to control everything I say or do even now.

I hadn't spoken to my dad in a long time as we'd grown apart, and I made the mistake of meeting up with him and his new partner a few years back. I had gone to his new home and spent a whole week with them. During this time, my dad had acted like he'd missed me so much and showered me with gifts and dinners, despite my boyfriend and I insisting that we'd pay. We stayed in a chalet there and, though there wasn't much to do, walked around and tried to catch up on life. I thought everything was fine.

Fast-forward to the following year and my twin brother is getting married overseas! We've always had a strained relationship, too, but my boyfriend encouraged us to go as he thought it'd be the right thing to do. Long story short... my dad had a psychotic breakdown at the wedding after an 'argument' with my brother. I still don't know what about. He shoved my boyfriend and I into a taxi with his partner and told us the 'Dubai Mafia' were after us and were going to kill us. Apparently my brother had set them on to us as we'd insulted him at his wedding.

My boyfriend and I were scared and confused and had no idea what was going on with my father. I tried calling other family members to say he'd had a breakdown (my mum was also there with her new boyfriend) but she insisted that she needed to fly back home as she had a shop to tend to(!). I knew that nobody was after us, but I was in a foreign country with little money, no Internet/signal, and I was terrified of how my father was acting.

He booked us into hotels and made us move between them every other day to 'cover our tracks' until it was finally time for our flight home. I repeatedly asked what was going on and told him to call the police - to which he responded, 'nothing is going on... we are on holiday!' I felt physically sick to my stomach and just wanted to be back home as soon as possible. His girlfriend also acted like everything was fine and told us to stop talking about it.

I received a call from my mum's boyfriend telling me that my dad and her partner had spent the whole wedding slagging my boyfriend and I off... Apparently, when we stayed with them for the week a year back, I had gotten debilitatingly drunk and started a fight with an elderly man in a restaurant. This was what my dad's girlfriend was saying and my dad nodded along in agreement. They also said that my boyfriend and I were sponging off them and only saw them to get free meals.

I was completely in shock at the string of lies they were sharing with the rest of the family - and the family of my brother's bride. I asked my boyfriend what the hell she was talking about - when did I get drunk? When did I start a fight? He told me that none of it was true and that they were compulsive liars. Why my mum's boyfriend felt the need to tell me, I don't know. He said they're crazy and I just need to stick it out until I got home.

As soon as we landed, I blocked my dad and his girlfriend on everything. I went to therapy and, two years later, I'm still working through whatever the hell that was. My boyfriend and I have changed irreparably and we don't feel like the same people anymore. I know that nobody here is going to believe me, but I need to vent. I cried on the phone to my mum later and asked her why she would leave us like that. She told me that I need to grow up and her shop is her only source of income.

I spent the whole of the next year trying to sustain a relationship with my mum and her partner but I've concluded that they're all as bad as each other, and here I am, alone! I don't know if my relationship will last. I'm on the highest dose of fluoxetine, and, even with that, I feel completely changed and negative about the world around me.

Anyway, I wanted to post here because I'm not a particularly social person. I don't really have any friends and even if I had - who would ever believe me? It sounds absolutely bonkers, and it is, but I know I'm not the only one who's been through something like this. I don't mean to dismiss them as 'crazy'. I know my family are very mentally unwell and God knows what happened in their own lives to make them this way.

If anyone has taken the time to read this, thank you. I don't expect any acknowledgement from you, but I needed to vent about this to someone.

 

[Riley Jones]

Well... I've grown up with a very difficult and abusive family life. I am a twin and my brother has always been the Golden Child. My parents are very traditional and conservative and always looked down on me because I was a girl. They never encouraged me to learn or succeed and often called me stupid. My dad always had a short temper and would occasionally hit me - though my mum conveniently never remembers this happening.

I eventually left home and went to university, and my mother always seemed to resent me for going (she married and had us very young). Neither of them were very warm people and my mother would always try to control me and hold me back, telling me how to behave and even to dress. She had no emotional connection to anyone but always doted on my brother. Even if I shared similar traits, they were painted as negative when they related to me.

I'm now grown up, living in the city, with a humble but stable job. I have a boyfriend of 6 years, who admittedly I moved in with very quickly, having had to return post-uni to live with my mum. I've always tried to maintain a distant-but-civil relationship with both parents, even though my dad thought my university work was boring (he's only interested in motor racing) and my mum attempts to control everything I say or do even now.

I hadn't spoken to my dad in a long time as we'd grown apart, and I made the mistake of meeting up with him and his new partner a few years back. I had gone to his new home and spent a whole week with them. During this time, my dad had acted like he'd missed me so much and showered me with gifts and dinners, despite my boyfriend and I insisting that we'd pay. We stayed in a chalet there and, though there wasn't much to do, walked around and tried to catch up on life. I thought everything was fine.

Fast-forward to the following year and my twin brother is getting married overseas! We've always had a strained relationship, too, but my boyfriend encouraged us to go as he thought it'd be the right thing to do. Long story short... my dad had a psychotic breakdown at the wedding after an 'argument' with my brother. I still don't know what about. He shoved my boyfriend and I into a taxi with his partner and told us the 'Dubai Mafia' were after us and were going to kill us. Apparently my brother had set them on to us as we'd insulted him at his wedding.

My boyfriend and I were scared and confused and had no idea what was going on with my father. I tried calling other family members to say he'd had a breakdown (my mum was also there with her new boyfriend) but she insisted that she needed to fly back home as she had a shop to tend to(!). I knew that nobody was after us, but I was in a foreign country with little money, no Internet/signal, and I was terrified of how my father was acting.

He booked us into hotels and made us move between them every other day to 'cover our tracks' until it was finally time for our flight home. I repeatedly asked what was going on and told him to call the police - to which he responded, 'nothing is going on... we are on holiday!' I felt physically sick to my stomach and just wanted to be back home as soon as possible. His girlfriend also acted like everything was fine and told us to stop talking about it.

I received a call from my mum's boyfriend telling me that my dad and her partner had spent the whole wedding slagging my boyfriend and I off... Apparently, when we stayed with them for the week a year back, I had gotten debilitatingly drunk and started a fight with an elderly man in a restaurant. This was what my dad's girlfriend was saying and my dad nodded along in agreement. They also said that my boyfriend and I were sponging off them and only saw them to get free meals.

I was completely in shock at the string of lies they were sharing with the rest of the family - and the family of my brother's bride. I asked my boyfriend what the hell she was talking about - when did I get drunk? When did I start a fight? He told me that none of it was true and that they were compulsive liars. Why my mum's boyfriend felt the need to tell me, I don't know. He said they're crazy and I just need to stick it out until I got home.

As soon as we landed, I blocked my dad and his girlfriend on everything. I went to therapy and, two years later, I'm still working through whatever the hell that was. My boyfriend and I have changed irreparably and we don't feel like the same people anymore. I know that nobody here is going to believe me, but I need to vent. I cried on the phone to my mum later and asked her why she would leave us like that. She told me that I need to grow up and her shop is her only source of income.

I spent the whole of the next year trying to sustain a relationship with my mum and her partner but I've concluded that they're all as bad as each other, and here I am, alone! I don't know if my relationship will last. I'm on the highest dose of fluoxetine, and, even with that, I feel completely changed and negative about the world around me.

Anyway, I wanted to post here because I'm not a particularly social person. I don't really have any friends and even if I had - who would ever believe me? It sounds absolutely bonkers, and it is, but I know I'm not the only one who's been through something like this. I don't mean to dismiss them as 'crazy'. I know my family are very mentally unwell and God knows what happened in their own lives to make them this way.

If anyone has taken the time to read this, thank you. I don't expect any acknowledgement from you, but I needed to vent about this to someone.

Hello there,

I'm truly sorry to hear about the painful experiences you've endured with your family. Thank you for sharing your story with us here. It's apparent that you've faced significant challenges and betrayals, yet you've shown immense strength by seeking therapy and trying to navigate these complex relationships.

A childhood overshadowed by favoritism, emotional neglect, and even abuse can deeply impact our adult lives. Your resilience in the face of these difficulties is truly inspiring, and taking the step to reach out and express your feelings is a powerful move towards healing.

You are not alone in these experiences, and sharing your story can be incredibly empowering. Many within our community have faced similar situations, and by opening up, you not only allow others to understand your journey but also create an opportunity to connect with those who can relate and offer support.

The sense of isolation you feel, especially when compounded by the skepticism others might have towards your story, is valid. However, know that here, people understand the seemingly “unbelievable” aspects of trauma. We believe you, and this is a space where you can find the understanding and empathy that might seem lacking elsewhere.

It's commendable that you've sought professional help. Therapy can be a crucial avenue for processing such traumatic experiences. If you're not currently connected with a therapist, I encourage you to continue or renew those efforts, possibly exploring different therapeutic approaches if you feel your healing has plateaued.

Our forums provide a variety of spaces for specific discussions—whether about challenging family dynamics, trust issues, relationships affected by trauma, or coping strategies. I encourage you to explore and participate as you're comfortable.

Remember, healing is not linear, and it's okay to feel raw and unsure about the road ahead. Your narrative is significant, and venting here is a step towards reclaiming your story. Thank you for trusting us with it. Please take care of yourself and know that support is always just a post away.

 

[Metropolitan Nomad]

Well... I've grown up with a very difficult and abusive family life. I am a twin and my brother has always been the Golden Child. My parents are very traditional and conservative and always looked down on me because I was a girl. They never encouraged me to learn or succeed and often called me stupid. My dad always had a short temper and would occasionally hit me - though my mum conveniently never remembers this happening.

I eventually left home and went to university, and my mother always seemed to resent me for going (she married and had us very young). Neither of them were very warm people and my mother would always try to control me and hold me back, telling me how to behave and even to dress. She had no emotional connection to anyone but always doted on my brother. Even if I shared similar traits, they were painted as negative when they related to me.

I'm now grown up, living in the city, with a humble but stable job. I have a boyfriend of 6 years, who admittedly I moved in with very quickly, having had to return post-uni to live with my mum. I've always tried to maintain a distant-but-civil relationship with both parents, even though my dad thought my university work was boring (he's only interested in motor racing) and my mum attempts to control everything I say or do even now.

I hadn't spoken to my dad in a long time as we'd grown apart, and I made the mistake of meeting up with him and his new partner a few years back. I had gone to his new home and spent a whole week with them. During this time, my dad had acted like he'd missed me so much and showered me with gifts and dinners, despite my boyfriend and I insisting that we'd pay. We stayed in a chalet there and, though there wasn't much to do, walked around and tried to catch up on life. I thought everything was fine.

Fast-forward to the following year and my twin brother is getting married overseas! We've always had a strained relationship, too, but my boyfriend encouraged us to go as he thought it'd be the right thing to do. Long story short... my dad had a psychotic breakdown at the wedding after an 'argument' with my brother. I still don't know what about. He shoved my boyfriend and I into a taxi with his partner and told us the 'Dubai Mafia' were after us and were going to kill us. Apparently my brother had set them on to us as we'd insulted him at his wedding.

My boyfriend and I were scared and confused and had no idea what was going on with my father. I tried calling other family members to say he'd had a breakdown (my mum was also there with her new boyfriend) but she insisted that she needed to fly back home as she had a shop to tend to(!). I knew that nobody was after us, but I was in a foreign country with little money, no Internet/signal, and I was terrified of how my father was acting.

He booked us into hotels and made us move between them every other day to 'cover our tracks' until it was finally time for our flight home. I repeatedly asked what was going on and told him to call the police - to which he responded, 'nothing is going on... we are on holiday!' I felt physically sick to my stomach and just wanted to be back home as soon as possible. His girlfriend also acted like everything was fine and told us to stop talking about it.

I received a call from my mum's boyfriend telling me that my dad and her partner had spent the whole wedding slagging my boyfriend and I off... Apparently, when we stayed with them for the week a year back, I had gotten debilitatingly drunk and started a fight with an elderly man in a restaurant. This was what my dad's girlfriend was saying and my dad nodded along in agreement. They also said that my boyfriend and I were sponging off them and only saw them to get free meals.

I was completely in shock at the string of lies they were sharing with the rest of the family - and the family of my brother's bride. I asked my boyfriend what the hell she was talking about - when did I get drunk? When did I start a fight? He told me that none of it was true and that they were compulsive liars. Why my mum's boyfriend felt the need to tell me, I don't know. He said they're crazy and I just need to stick it out until I got home.

As soon as we landed, I blocked my dad and his girlfriend on everything. I went to therapy and, two years later, I'm still working through whatever the hell that was. My boyfriend and I have changed irreparably and we don't feel like the same people anymore. I know that nobody here is going to believe me, but I need to vent. I cried on the phone to my mum later and asked her why she would leave us like that. She told me that I need to grow up and her shop is her only source of income.

I spent the whole of the next year trying to sustain a relationship with my mum and her partner but I've concluded that they're all as bad as each other, and here I am, alone! I don't know if my relationship will last. I'm on the highest dose of fluoxetine, and, even with that, I feel completely changed and negative about the world around me.

Anyway, I wanted to post here because I'm not a particularly social person. I don't really have any friends and even if I had - who would ever believe me? It sounds absolutely bonkers, and it is, but I know I'm not the only one who's been through something like this. I don't mean to dismiss them as 'crazy'. I know my family are very mentally unwell and God knows what happened in their own lives to make them this way.

If anyone has taken the time to read this, thank you. I don't expect any acknowledgement from you, but I needed to vent about this to someone.

For what it's worth I've had to deal with a family betrayal. I've heard, learned and seen things that I never imagined and it hurt but it also made me harder and more determined to stamp out any kind of two-faced, selfish behaviour. It has also wiped out my trust in humanity.

'To Thine Own Self Be True', Meaning & Context

‘To thine own self be true’ is a line from Act 1 Scene 3 of Shakespeare’s play, Hamlet. It is spoken by King Claudius’ chief minister, Polonius as part of a speech

nosweatshakespeare.com

 

[Susan Jane]

Well... I've grown up with a very difficult and abusive family life. I am a twin and my brother has always been the Golden Child. My parents are very traditional and conservative and always looked down on me because I was a girl. They never encouraged me to learn or succeed and often called me stupid. My dad always had a short temper and would occasionally hit me - though my mum conveniently never remembers this happening.

I eventually left home and went to university, and my mother always seemed to resent me for going (she married and had us very young). Neither of them were very warm people and my mother would always try to control me and hold me back, telling me how to behave and even to dress. She had no emotional connection to anyone but always doted on my brother. Even if I shared similar traits, they were painted as negative when they related to me.

I'm now grown up, living in the city, with a humble but stable job. I have a boyfriend of 6 years, who admittedly I moved in with very quickly, having had to return post-uni to live with my mum. I've always tried to maintain a distant-but-civil relationship with both parents, even though my dad thought my university work was boring (he's only interested in motor racing) and my mum attempts to control everything I say or do even now.

I hadn't spoken to my dad in a long time as we'd grown apart, and I made the mistake of meeting up with him and his new partner a few years back. I had gone to his new home and spent a whole week with them. During this time, my dad had acted like he'd missed me so much and showered me with gifts and dinners, despite my boyfriend and I insisting that we'd pay. We stayed in a chalet there and, though there wasn't much to do, walked around and tried to catch up on life. I thought everything was fine.

Fast-forward to the following year and my twin brother is getting married overseas! We've always had a strained relationship, too, but my boyfriend encouraged us to go as he thought it'd be the right thing to do. Long story short... my dad had a psychotic breakdown at the wedding after an 'argument' with my brother. I still don't know what about. He shoved my boyfriend and I into a taxi with his partner and told us the 'Dubai Mafia' were after us and were going to kill us. Apparently my brother had set them on to us as we'd insulted him at his wedding.

My boyfriend and I were scared and confused and had no idea what was going on with my father. I tried calling other family members to say he'd had a breakdown (my mum was also there with her new boyfriend) but she insisted that she needed to fly back home as she had a shop to tend to(!). I knew that nobody was after us, but I was in a foreign country with little money, no Internet/signal, and I was terrified of how my father was acting.

He booked us into hotels and made us move between them every other day to 'cover our tracks' until it was finally time for our flight home. I repeatedly asked what was going on and told him to call the police - to which he responded, 'nothing is going on... we are on holiday!' I felt physically sick to my stomach and just wanted to be back home as soon as possible. His girlfriend also acted like everything was fine and told us to stop talking about it.

I received a call from my mum's boyfriend telling me that my dad and her partner had spent the whole wedding slagging my boyfriend and I off... Apparently, when we stayed with them for the week a year back, I had gotten debilitatingly drunk and started a fight with an elderly man in a restaurant. This was what my dad's girlfriend was saying and my dad nodded along in agreement. They also said that my boyfriend and I were sponging off them and only saw them to get free meals.

I was completely in shock at the string of lies they were sharing with the rest of the family - and the family of my brother's bride. I asked my boyfriend what the hell she was talking about - when did I get drunk? When did I start a fight? He told me that none of it was true and that they were compulsive liars. Why my mum's boyfriend felt the need to tell me, I don't know. He said they're crazy and I just need to stick it out until I got home.

As soon as we landed, I blocked my dad and his girlfriend on everything. I went to therapy and, two years later, I'm still working through whatever the hell that was. My boyfriend and I have changed irreparably and we don't feel like the same people anymore. I know that nobody here is going to believe me, but I need to vent. I cried on the phone to my mum later and asked her why she would leave us like that. She told me that I need to grow up and her shop is her only source of income.

I spent the whole of the next year trying to sustain a relationship with my mum and her partner but I've concluded that they're all as bad as each other, and here I am, alone! I don't know if my relationship will last. I'm on the highest dose of fluoxetine, and, even with that, I feel completely changed and negative about the world around me.

Anyway, I wanted to post here because I'm not a particularly social person. I don't really have any friends and even if I had - who would ever believe me? It sounds absolutely bonkers, and it is, but I know I'm not the only one who's been through something like this. I don't mean to dismiss them as 'crazy'. I know my family are very mentally unwell and God knows what happened in their own lives to make them this way.

If anyone has taken the time to read this, thank you. I don't expect any acknowledgement from you, but I needed to vent about this to someone.

That is not bonkers. I have had similar situations in my life minus the psychotic breakdown. I am feeling rather tired at the moment but, I want to tell you something; I believe every word. My family well, yeah, very mentally unwell and people in the past had a hard time believing my stories... so I get you. Susan

 

[deno]

I believe you. I lived through something very similar, and I know how deep this kind of betrayal cuts.

When people rewrite history, turn others against you, and gaslight you into questioning your own reality, it doesn’t just break your trust—it shakes the foundation of who you are. That’s not something you just get over.

You’re not crazy. You’re not alone. I know what it’s like to carry the weight of the truth when everyone else denies it. It makes you feel like you don’t belong anywhere. But you do. And even though you feel completely changed by what happened, that doesn’t mean you are lost forever.

I know you said you don’t expect acknowledgment, but you deserve it. This pain is real. What they did was real. And you are not alone in it.

 

[deno]

I’ve been where you are. And I mean that in the deepest way. I know what it’s like to be gaslit, erased, turned into the villain in a story I never wrote. I know what it’s like to be in so much pain that you don’t even recognize yourself anymore.

And here’s what I want to tell you: You are not crazy. You are not alone. And even though it doesn’t feel like it now, you are not lost forever.

I don’t know what the turning point will be for you, but I do know this—gaining knowledge, understanding the patterns, and seeing the truth clearly was what changed everything for me. When I started learning what I was up against, when I saw how deep the manipulation went, I stopped blaming myself. I stopped believing their version of me. And that was the beginning of something different.

You don’t have to have all the answers today. But keep searching. Keep questioning. Every bit of understanding you gain is a step toward freedom. And one day, you’ll look back and realize you’re not in that place anymore.

I see you. And I believe you.

 

[phemstros]

Well... I've grown up with a very difficult and abusive family life. I am a twin and my brother has always been the Golden Child. My parents are very traditional and conservative and always looked down on me because I was a girl. They never encouraged me to learn or succeed and often called me stupid. My dad always had a short temper and would occasionally hit me - though my mum conveniently never remembers this happening.

I eventually left home and went to university, and my mother always seemed to resent me for going (she married and had us very young). Neither of them were very warm people and my mother would always try to control me and hold me back, telling me how to behave and even to dress. She had no emotional connection to anyone but always doted on my brother. Even if I shared similar traits, they were painted as negative when they related to me.

I'm now grown up, living in the city, with a humble but stable job. I have a boyfriend of 6 years, who admittedly I moved in with very quickly, having had to return post-uni to live with my mum. I've always tried to maintain a distant-but-civil relationship with both parents, even though my dad thought my university work was boring (he's only interested in motor racing) and my mum attempts to control everything I say or do even now.

I hadn't spoken to my dad in a long time as we'd grown apart, and I made the mistake of meeting up with him and his new partner a few years back. I had gone to his new home and spent a whole week with them. During this time, my dad had acted like he'd missed me so much and showered me with gifts and dinners, despite my boyfriend and I insisting that we'd pay. We stayed in a chalet there and, though there wasn't much to do, walked around and tried to catch up on life. I thought everything was fine.

Fast-forward to the following year and my twin brother is getting married overseas! We've always had a strained relationship, too, but my boyfriend encouraged us to go as he thought it'd be the right thing to do. Long story short... my dad had a psychotic breakdown at the wedding after an 'argument' with my brother. I still don't know what about. He shoved my boyfriend and I into a taxi with his partner and told us the 'Dubai Mafia' were after us and were going to kill us. Apparently my brother had set them on to us as we'd insulted him at his wedding.

My boyfriend and I were scared and confused and had no idea what was going on with my father. I tried calling other family members to say he'd had a breakdown (my mum was also there with her new boyfriend) but she insisted that she needed to fly back home as she had a shop to tend to(!). I knew that nobody was after us, but I was in a foreign country with little money, no Internet/signal, and I was terrified of how my father was acting.

He booked us into hotels and made us move between them every other day to 'cover our tracks' until it was finally time for our flight home. I repeatedly asked what was going on and told him to call the police - to which he responded, 'nothing is going on... we are on holiday!' I felt physically sick to my stomach and just wanted to be back home as soon as possible. His girlfriend also acted like everything was fine and told us to stop talking about it.

I received a call from my mum's boyfriend telling me that my dad and her partner had spent the whole wedding slagging my boyfriend and I off... Apparently, when we stayed with them for the week a year back, I had gotten debilitatingly drunk and started a fight with an elderly man in a restaurant. This was what my dad's girlfriend was saying and my dad nodded along in agreement. They also said that my boyfriend and I were sponging off them and only saw them to get free meals.

I was completely in shock at the string of lies they were sharing with the rest of the family - and the family of my brother's bride. I asked my boyfriend what the hell she was talking about - when did I get drunk? When did I start a fight? He told me that none of it was true and that they were compulsive liars. Why my mum's boyfriend felt the need to tell me, I don't know. He said they're crazy and I just need to stick it out until I got home.

As soon as we landed, I blocked my dad and his girlfriend on everything. I went to therapy and, two years later, I'm still working through whatever the hell that was. My boyfriend and I have changed irreparably and we don't feel like the same people anymore. I know that nobody here is going to believe me, but I need to vent. I cried on the phone to my mum later and asked her why she would leave us like that. She told me that I need to grow up and her shop is her only source of income.

I spent the whole of the next year trying to sustain a relationship with my mum and her partner but I've concluded that they're all as bad as each other, and here I am, alone! I don't know if my relationship will last. I'm on the highest dose of fluoxetine, and, even with that, I feel completely changed and negative about the world around me.

Anyway, I wanted to post here because I'm not a particularly social person. I don't really have any friends and even if I had - who would ever believe me? It sounds absolutely bonkers, and it is, but I know I'm not the only one who's been through something like this. I don't mean to dismiss them as 'crazy'. I know my family are very mentally unwell and God knows what happened in their own lives to make them this way.

If anyone has taken the time to read this, thank you. I don't expect any acknowledgement from you, but I needed to vent about this to someone.

Thanks for sharing and I believe you completely. I have a lot of mental illness in my family and some totally delusional people.

Your mum's boyfriend did you a massive favour, and his motivations seem to be yhe right ones. I don't see any benefit to him at your expense.

You need to build bridges with your brother; for yourself, for your understanding of each other, and for him. It may be that he did not have a picnic but even so, it is the most important thing here. Good luck.