Told My Dad About My Sexual Abuse

[Zurrealx98]

...and I regret it. He was clearly upset but he obviously didn't want to deal with it. It was overwhelmingly underwhelming. I felt so uncomfortable telling him anyways. I didn't want him to see me differently. I rushed it and now I regret it. He almost seemed angry at me for a second. I know he wasn't. But it just seemed like he wanted to move on. He kept telling me to forget it and turn to God and not tell anyone else. To not tell my siblings or friends. I know he was upset but he didn't cry. He didn't hug me. He just seemed to momentarily be upset and then move on with normal conversation. And now everything's going to be different and he's going to see my differently. I wish I didn't tell him.

I've never gotten the response that I've needed. I'm not an emotional or super affectionate or mushy gushy person. But I just need someone to give me a hug and listen to me and give me a hug. Actually, when I told my bother he did give me that response. But it's been months and we haven't talked about it since. Which is fine bc I am the one who told him I didn't wanna talk about it. I just always seem to tell the wrong people or get the wrong response.


Please excuse any grammatical errors im not in the best frame of mind rn. I guess I just needed to say this bc it's cathartic.

 

[Teasel]

My heart goes out to you @Zurrealx98
I have to say I wasn't very successful at getting the response I so dearly wished for from my family either and understand how difficult that is.
Hugs for you from the UK! :hug:

 

[ladee]

I think we go to the people we expect are going to be ouraged on our behalf. Who are gong to demand justice. Who will help us seek help.
I rarely turns our that way.
To this day one of my biggest triggers is "not being heard".
I'm sorry he handled it the way he did. It was very invalidating and possibly made you feel like a dirty secret that should be kept quite.
We heard you Tho. And I am very sad and angry at your abuser.
He is the only thing "dirty" here...not you.
Do you mind sharing your age and whether or not you have a therapist.
You did come to the right place to be heard. I am So sorry you have this to deal with along 18th the abuse.
Thank you for the courage to share.
Hope we can help.
Come back sand let us know how you are and know you were heard.
Can only send cyber hugs..but would give you a real hug if I was there.

 

[Rumors]

What ladded said... It is a trigger for me when I think I am not heard and acknowledged. The only person that hears me is my therapist. If you don't have one your should get one. A good one will offer support and validation.
I am really sorry. It re traumatizes you when you feel like it has to be a secret. Sad... Sending you support.

 

[Zurrealx98]

I think we go to the people we expect are going to be ouraged on our behalf. Who are gong to demand justi...

I am 18 and I am in the process of getting a therapist. (I am using the counseling services at my university but they are a bit backed up so I'm still on the wait list. I have had my intake session and everything tho)
Everytime I open up to anyone I know in real life I feel kind of disgusted and want to avoid them. It's why I rarely tell anyone.

 

[ladee]

But you can tell us. WE already understand.
Sometimes it feels safer to talk to people that we don't know..but that have been where you are right now.
And you are being very invested in your future.
I know for a fact at 18 I had no clue how sick I was and how bad I needed help.
So you are doing fantastic.
We understand how you feel. We really do.
Very glad you are here.