They just don't understand!!!!

[Penelope1]

Hi everyone... this is my first time posting and I'm hoping it will be a good experience. September and October are the worst months for my PTSD. The last 3 years I've had to go on medical leave, and last year I was admitted to the hospital. I've been working closely with my psychiatrist and therapist to get me through this year, but it seems as if my family has other plans. My CPTSD is from childhood abuse, and is easily triggered by my families intense anger. There is a family issue I have been trying to dissociate from, but without fail my family finds a way to verbal abuse me, and bring me into it. So now I'm triggered! I'm already ruminating and my horrible nightmares are back. Why doesn't my family understand how easily they can damage me? I don't want to go back to the hospital. Any positive thoughts would be really welcomed! Thanks in advance

 

[Friday]

Going back to the hospital would be one way to avoid having to deal with your family. Are there any other ways you might like better? Intervening steps between having to deal with them & hospitalized? Blocking numbers/email, vacation, moving, etc.? Or increased therapeutic support? Help with dysregulation? More coping mechanisms?

 

[Scarlet13]

Do you live with them?
Can you go no contact or low contact for awhile?

 

[Penelope1]

Going back to the hospital would be one way to avoid having to deal with your family. Are there any othe...

Thank you for replying. They are in Cleveland and I'm in North Carolina. Last night I blocked all but my dad on Facebook and their numbers in my phone. I called my therapist and have an appointment on Monday. It just makes me so angry that I keep explaining to them my triggers and they don't care.

Do you live with them?
Can you go no contact or low contact for awhile?

I live in North Carolina and they are in Cleveland. I spent last night blocking all family members, but my dad, on my phone and Facebook. I just get so angry that they disregard my triggers no matter how badly it effects me.

 

[EveHarrington]

Abusers don't care.

I repeat, abusers don't care.

Going no contact might be a really good idea.

 

[Deleted member 541]

Why would you tell your abusers what your triggers are???? That just gives them more ammunition to use against you. No contact is a great idea IMO!!!

 

[EveHarrington]

Agreed.

You are hand delivering abuse tactics to your abusers! Please stop telling them about your triggers. I realize that you're at a stage where you still believe that blood is thicker than water, but at some point I hope you realize that these people are toxic and you deserve so much better! :hug:

 

[Sideways]

Anniversaries can be incredibly difficult. It's okay if you decide you need to go back to hospital for the extra support to get you through. In the meantime, definitely a good idea to get some distance between yourself and anyone that is going to make this period more difficult for you. You want to be surrounding yourself with your supports right now.

As for copping verbal abuse from family members? You actually don't have to put up with that at any time. Perhaps once you get yourself through this tough period, pencil in some time with your T to talk about ways your can better protect yourself.

You don't deserve abuse. You just don't. And while we put up with a lot from our family, just because they're family, hopefully one day you will come to have confidence in your own dignity, and your entitlement to be treated with respect.

In the meantime, block em through the tough period if that works for you. I've got an anniversary that I've ended up hospitalised for 7 years running. And while I'm still hoping this is the year I manage outside? I'm not gonna kid myself - anniversaries are tough. So be extra gentle with yourself, and have plenty of self-care activities that you can pull out at a moments notice to keep yourself going:)