I don't know what this was?

[Isuc]

He was an older family member. I was 15-16. He would take off his pants in random situations and expose himself in front of me while I was babysitting his toddler. The last time I was sitting on the floor and he came in the room and he came from behind me and then around and right in front of me with his penis sticking right in front of my face. I was lucky my path to the door was free so I ran away from the house barefoot and finally talked about what was happening. All these years later and I don't know what to name this. What is this? What would you call this?

 

[Apas]

Psychology

Paraphilia - Exhibitionism / Flashing.

Exhibitionism | Psychology Today

Exhibitionistic disorder involves exposing one's genitals or sexual organs to a non-consenting person. This condition falls under the psychiatric category of paraphilic disorders, which refer to persistent and intense atypical sexual arousal patterns that are accompanied by clinically significant distress or impairment.

Criminology (in the US)

Indecent Exposure
- Misdemenor
- Gross misdemeanor : Enhanced penalties, including jail time, & possible sex offender registry if victims(s) are under X-age (commonly 14, but varies by state).
- Class C Felony : Repeat offender

* Lewd Conduct with Minor is the next criminal step, which involves more than exposing one's genitals & less than sexual assault. Typically involves masturbating.

 

[Ota]

What would I call it? A crime. A crime against a child. You may have thought you were all grown up at 15 but you were still a child. You didn't deserve to be treated like that

 

[Isuc]

Thank you for your responses. Maybe somewhere to start. Definitions can be hard. He never really touched me but the psychological abuse was almost harder. Having to keep quiet and sit down to eat dinner or drive in the car after he had done this.

 

[Dedaro]

You don't have to touch someone for it to be wrong, or for it to be a crime.

 

[Eceze]

Hi @isuc.. I would call it wrong... Dirty bastard.... He knew exactly what he was doing.... It's sick.....

Im so sorry you had to deal with that..... As he was an older family member... Do you still have to see him?.. And how about the kid you baby sat....?..

It's awful.... I hope you told your parents... Take care

 

[Isuc]

Hi @isuc.. I would call it wrong... Dirty bastard.... He knew exactly what he was doing.... It's sick.....

Im so sorry...

Thank you. Your support means so much to me! It's been years. I told my parents, but I was leaving with these family members at the time (him and his wife) so had to move out and live with some other family members. I have had to still see them but try to keep our relationship at a minimum. Though the let the girl I babysat intern at my work this summer and it was darn hard as she is almost the same age I was at the time. (She has never known about her father would do)

 

[Mejivi]

Crap! One of those instances for a trigger...but....thank you. I have had actual rape and actual molestation, but with another person this same type of thing happened and I often wondered "where to categorize" it. Trauma is so stupid! Well since this is the worst case scenerio then "that other wasn't so bad..yes it bugs me but it isn't really that bad." You bring "the other" up to a healthy person and they look at you like..."that's the worst thing that could ever happen"...in your head your like, "nah". SMH! Grrrr....

 

[Cowa]

I hate mental pictures! They do seem to last so much longer! And I can see where one could develop ptsd from it. I was just speaking my own experience previous to this. BTW

 

[Uwe]

I hate mental pictures! They do seem to last so much longer! And I can see where one could develop ptsd from it...

Really? Unpleasant, yes it was, it was totally inappropriate but I really struggle with the idea of a 15 year old seeing a penis causing PTSD. What an utter nonsense and does in my view minimise those folk who have suffered significant sexual assault.

 

[Isuc]

Really? Unpleasant, yes it was, it was totally inappropriate but I really struggle with the idea of a 15 year old seeing a...

Wow this is really not supportive.
I don't think this caused me PTSD, but it was I believe traumatic. And it had nothing to do with seeing a penis or not in my case. It was the fear and how abusive this person turned once I told and I had to still live with him. As well as having to keep this to myself as it happened and pretend it was nothing to not ruin everyone's life.
I would never consider this as bad as someone who was sexually abused. I just struggle to find a meaning and understanding for it.

 

[Pako]

My response (as Uwe) was addressed to @Cowa's comment that they thought someone could get PTSD from a mental picture, which is utter nonsense. It's not supportive to smile and nod while someone talks rubbish about a serious health condition.