i believe my husband of 18 years has ptsd. He's never been diagnosed as he's so ashamed and won't seek help. He did active military duty about 30 years ago and I understand he witnessed and took part in some awful things that he absolutely refuses to talk about.
He has always been a restless sleeper, experiencing violent nightmares where he shouts and jerks violently. This has led to us having separate bedrooms. When he's had a bad night, he's very quiet and almost closed off from everything the following day.
He used to have a binge drinking problem which he has managed to control for the past four years but during these binges he would experience, I believe, 'flash-back's' which caused him so much distress he would cry out and weep for long periods, but most of what he said during these times was uninteligible.
Things calmed down a lot over the last few years and I thought he was over it.
But last night we went to a party where he had too much to drink. I drove him home and helped him to bed where he suddenly became this crazy person that I didn't recognise at all.
He cried and sobbed while he appeared to be in great pain and also terrified. He shouted out things like "no daddy, I don't want to do it" over and over and then continued to cry and say "they're all killing each other!" And "it hurts, it hurts!"
He appeared to have huge mental anguish which he couldn't control and at the same time seemed aware that I was there and continuously apologised and shouted "don't look at me, you mustn't look at this!" Then he would hold his head and groan while he breathed very fast.
It was terrifying to watch. I did whatever I could to make him comfortable and eventually he calmed down and fell asleep.
Should I be doing more? I worry that such extreme terror may cause a heart attack or stroke for him.
Today he doesn't want to discuss the incident at all.
Does ptsd ever go away? Why does it seem worse so many years later?
Sorry this is rather long. He told me to never tell anyone about his problem, but I really need to talk to someone. Watching him go through this last night has been so upsetting.
He has always been a restless sleeper, experiencing violent nightmares where he shouts and jerks violently. This has led to us having separate bedrooms. When he's had a bad night, he's very quiet and almost closed off from everything the following day.
He used to have a binge drinking problem which he has managed to control for the past four years but during these binges he would experience, I believe, 'flash-back's' which caused him so much distress he would cry out and weep for long periods, but most of what he said during these times was uninteligible.
Things calmed down a lot over the last few years and I thought he was over it.
But last night we went to a party where he had too much to drink. I drove him home and helped him to bed where he suddenly became this crazy person that I didn't recognise at all.
He cried and sobbed while he appeared to be in great pain and also terrified. He shouted out things like "no daddy, I don't want to do it" over and over and then continued to cry and say "they're all killing each other!" And "it hurts, it hurts!"
He appeared to have huge mental anguish which he couldn't control and at the same time seemed aware that I was there and continuously apologised and shouted "don't look at me, you mustn't look at this!" Then he would hold his head and groan while he breathed very fast.
It was terrifying to watch. I did whatever I could to make him comfortable and eventually he calmed down and fell asleep.
Should I be doing more? I worry that such extreme terror may cause a heart attack or stroke for him.
Today he doesn't want to discuss the incident at all.
Does ptsd ever go away? Why does it seem worse so many years later?
Sorry this is rather long. He told me to never tell anyone about his problem, but I really need to talk to someone. Watching him go through this last night has been so upsetting.
