DID Angry parts and my t

[Punky143]

I have many parts and each one has their own personality. They can all get very dysregulated for a variety of reasons but within hours or days they settle down. But not the angry parts. They like to sabatoge any progress and absolutely hate hearing my T mention anything positive. In fact, they don't like my T and seem to think rules don't apply. That being said, the day after last weeks session they think it's funny to send a not so nice email to her. I'm not going to look at it. Does anyone else do that?

 

[Ronin]

Can they take it up with you - and those that go to therapy - instead of the therapist why they don't like the rules, and don't like the therapist, or the process? (Separate areas. May have different reasons in each.)

Which you could then figure accomodations for, either on your own or with your therapist?
Maybe you could let your therapist know something needs be rephrased, while speaking of progress, too?
(I'm fairly sure when sliding to different trauma mindset, the phrasing that will work will only be some that close to worked /then/, or with a style of people we were with then. Not even about current time, because emotionally = no comprendo, not current, change the lingo much.)

 

[Keen]

Have you tried telling the angry parts something like "I get it! Progress seems dangerous cause you know you can survive with things as they are, but not if they change. Thanks for trying to protect me! I promise I will not let us get into any dangerous situations like we were in when we were younger. I'm an adult now and will take care of things." ? There's a chance something like that could calm them down some.

 

[Muttly]

I'm curious, when you say "not so nice email to your T" . It turns out, my T likes my angry part (ugh) and appreciates his feedback. What I took as awful emails, she took as useful feedback and non-offensive. Allowing him to talk to T and eventually realizing that he wasn't going to scare T away was a rotten but really good process to go through.

 

[TruthSeeker]

I'm curious, when you say "not so nice email to your T" . It turns out, my T likes my angry part (ugh) a...

Yep...I .sent an angry text to T for canceling on me because she had to have eye surgery (elective).....she opened up the can of worms about parts...then just cancelled and left me hanging and there were no other days I could go.... (it didn't cross my mind that she was human.....that was a time when trust was very thin.....a perfect reason my angry part wanted to get rid of her). After I sent the angry text, then she got sent an angry e-mail further explaining the angry text....she handled it well when the next therapy session came around...and by then...I didn't recall all of what I said in the text/email...just the gist....I could say it was a tantrum disguised as a text.