Venting

[Phuckmylyfe82]

Several years ago when my two middle children were still toddlers, I was busy making dinner one day and I had stepped away from the stove and they had snuck out the side door and the neighbor went and got them for me and brought them back to me. I admit that I messed up big time, but ever since then I have been judged severely, as if no one around me has ever messed up with their lives or with their kids. After that incident, I made sure it never happened again. I realize it could have ended up much worse than it did. Well.... it was just brought up again and again I feel really judged and I can still feel the feeling of being judged and put down due to one mistake I made, but they never want to admit their f ups... I don't need to be reminded how f*cked up that experience was and how it could have ended. I am already having a tough time dealing with these PTSD symptoms. Dammit I hate people... I probably won't be posting under this name ever again out of fear of being judged.... and looked at once again as the worst person in the world.

Of course it was my boyfriend and his family who have judged me severely over the years and he is the one who brought up again just now and how that old hag that he had as a mother used to always talk shit about me. I am so glad she died..... I just wish he would stop bringing stuff up....

 

[Swift]

People judge... it's what they do.
Everyone screws up, and some people turn holier-than-thou into an Olympic sport.
I'm sorry your boyfriend's family are like that (although I do hope you don't say she's a hag to his face.)

 

[Phuckmylyfe82]

People judge... it's what they do.
Everyone screws up, and some people turn holier-than-thou into an Olym...

Thank you... And no, I would never do that...lol. I agree. Everyone screws up, and I realize I screwed up pretty badly, but I don't need to be reminded of it several years later. Thanks for reading and understanding. I really appreciate it.

 

[Swift]

Yeah. I mean, from where I'm standing, it's not a major screw-up. Sure, it could have been tragic, but there's a huge difference between something like that and doing something deliberately harmful.
The fact that they're still on about it suggests to me that you're fairly light on actual terrible things, too.

 

[Phuckmylyfe82]

Yeah.... I wouldn't hurt a fly. Thank you. Hope you have an amazing day.

 

[Swift]

I can kinda tell that.
I have hurt flies in the past, but the ones in Australia bite.

 

[Mach123]

Dominance and submission. Don't let them. Only you can say no. "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone." If you can't, tell them I said to leave you alone. I hate people lol. Hope you feel better.

 

[Freida]

Kids escape all the time -- you are not the first parent to turn around and find them gone. It's super common.

If your people are still judging you about someting that happened years ago maybe it's time to find new people.....??

 

[Phuckmylyfe82]

Dominance and submission. Don't let them. Only you can say no. "Let he who is without sin cast the f...

Thank you

Kids escape all the time -- you are not the first parent to turn around and find them gone. It's super...

You're absolutely right. Thank you

 

[Gs172003]

Kids escape all the time -- you are not the first parent to turn around and find them gone. It's super...

What she said

 

[Deleted member 34561]

Yeah I'm with Freida on what she said.... Find new people? What's your bloke feeling so bad about that he has to constantly harp on about one little mistake on your part that happened years ago? Sounds like he's in a bit of denial about his own short comings as a parent and twisting it round and projecting/dumping it on to you? Does he do that to you a lot? My ex did its called mental and emotional abuse love. He was just punishing me for stuff he was doing himself that I had no idea he was even doing at the time. I tolerated it for bloody 23 years then jogged him on a few months ago. Since then I'm getting happier by the day. And no I ain't bloody perfect myself God knows I made enough parental mistakes myself. But at least I wasn't a lying cheating deceitful kiddy fiddling woman beating bastard like my ex was. As Mach so rightly pointed out 'let he or she without sin cast the first stone'. Next time your bloke starts on you again remember my post please love. And start looking at him if you can find no current fault within yourself. He sounds like a bully like his old hag of a mother to me. Bless ya B xx

 

[Freida]

So to make you feel better about escapee kids --- A call I worked back in the day..

Lady calls in and says she is driving on one of our local freeways and she just passed two little kids walking down the side of the road with suitcases. She couldn't stop because she was doing 55 -but was turning around to go back. By the time she got back we had an officer, who just happened to be in the area, with them. It was two little boys, 3 and 5, who had gotten in trouble at home and had been sent to their room until dinner. They were mad so they packed their little suitcases, climbed out the bedroom window and were running away to grandmas. All they knew was that they had to go on the freeway to get her so that's what they did.

Officer gathered them up, figured out where they lived, and knocked on the door. Mom opened it and said, how did you get outside? Officer told her where they were found. Mom fainted. Yep. fainted.

Bad parent? Nope. We got these calls all the time....

kids are like feral cats --- corralling them can be a challenge!