General Did you know? a lot of military veterans do not like fireworks!

[Deleted member 487]

NEVER EVER CALL A VETERAN A COWARD!!!!!!

They can be assholes. They can be human trash. But a coward is never willing to right his or her life in order to save that of their brothers-in-arms. A veteran is willing to put his or her life on the line for a person they do not even know.

 

[blackemerald1]

People who lack the fortitude to make any attempt to rehabilitate themselves and instead push the responsibilty of managing their symptoms off onto someone else...

Where did you get the evidence to support this type of statement? Who is doing this? ^^^

What an extreme over-reaction to someone...not liking fireworks. Lots of people don't like fireworks and it has nothing to do with the military are they all cowards too?

You say you 'fought for you country to preserve freedoms'....

Did you also fight for the freedoms for people who do not like/enjoy/tolerate things and to preserve their right to say so?

Don't they have the right to put a sign at the end of their drive, hang a placard around their neck, protest, write novels, post here on this site even and not be labelled a coward by anyone?

You know nothing irl about other members here but jump to the opinion that a dislike of fireworks has to be cowardly. That is a big assumption.

my neurological system is very damaged. The nervous system is VERY slow to heal, if it heals at all. I can’t “exposure” my way through this one.

Prime example ^^^ I am similar to @EveHarrington - I cannot re-wire my nervous system.

PTSD isn't a one size fits all condition. There are many symptoms of ptsd that do not and have never responded or resolved to 'exposure therapy'. And there are a lot of things that repeated exposure to would render someone seriously ill...all over again.

I don't have time for inefficiencies or time to worry about how others emotions will be affected by what's in my head. Everything I do, I do with the intent on helping other people, but sometimes to make an omelet you need to break some eggs.

This is completely contradictory. You help no-one but the select few that agree with you. This is a gate-keeper attitude and locks out more possibilities and people than it allows in. You are not actually making an omelette when dealing with people. Have you considered this. What happens to the 'eggs/people' that do get broken?

 

[Virtues]

@blackemerald1 this is funny to me... everyone is going to misconstrue my words to mean what is convenient for them to launch an argument. Here it's this simple: If the shoe fits, wear it! If it doesn't fit than I'm not talking about you. Quit internalizing what I'm saying and making it about you; this has nothing to do with you (unless you fit into the category I'm talking about)

NEVER!!!! did I say that putting a sign out makes you a coward; let's get that straight 1st of all. What I did say is IF you put a sign out because you are too afraid to do the work to get better, and would rather just have other people responsible for managing your symptoms, that is cowardice behavior... so if you're not doing this, then why do you assume I'm talking about you? The world doesn't revolve around you; not everything is about you... I'm sorry but these people ARE out there; I deal with them from time to time in my VA groups.

I also said that these signs are enforcing victimizing behavior. (which is not the same thing as being a coward).

And as far as the statement that one's neurological system is damaged, and can never be repaired??? I'm no doctor so I can neither confirm nor deny this statement, but I can speak from personal experience, and I was once afraid of fireworks but through perseverance, determination, and a lot of therapy and prolonged exposure, I got over my fear... call me a liar!

 

[Virtues]

A veteran is willing to put his or her life on the line for a person they do not even know.

This is sometimes true, this is sometimes not true. If you don't think cowards slip through the cracks and make it to the front line, you are naive. I have been there to see people fold under pressure, to fall apart in the heat of battle, to let their fear get the best of them and make decisions that would hurt the unit. Until you have walked a mile in my boots, don't pretend to know and to generalize. This is a very encompassing statement which is not fair or accurate. Some people are some ways, other people are other ways; you have to look at the individual and judge them by their individual actions, not lump them into a group like just because they're veterans they're brave; it's not that simple.

 

[blackemerald1]

So now you have been set straight by Anthony in another thread you are full of wisdom Florian??^^^^

Please stop trying to tell us we have no right to our own opinions and experiences.

I am not internalising anything you say. I just disagree with you and I am not the only one.

 

[Virtues]

Please stop trying to tell us we have no right to our own opinions and experiences.

NEVER DID I SAY THIS!!!

please quote my post where I said this

I have been set straight??? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHA!!!!

anthony, simply gave me a way at looking at my individual combat situation (which had nothing to do with fireworks... at all)

It gave me insight into this specific experience I had.

But if you need to believe I'm "wrong" so you can be "right" than please keep believing that...

 

[Never_falter2]

So let me explain. My vet dislikes fireworks and it did not get better over time, could it have gotten better if he had worked harder on it? I do not know and it is not the point. He worked very hard on other things, he worked hard on non ptsd related areas of his life like his job, he works hard on being a good daddy, he works hard on other ptsd symptoms. One cannot work hard 100 percent of the time and it doesn‘t make you a failure, a victim or a coward.

Let‘s talk about something different: a vet who is blind. In my country blind people wear such a sign which shows that they are blind. People typically react very friendly and assist them, they do not ask why some blind need more assistance than others or tell them how they have a friend who is blind but copes much better

Back to people with ptsd: Some may need tough love, but my vet is none of those because he already feels not good about himself instead he needs much encouragement and people who assist him.

Vet no matter if they are blind, afraid of fireworks or totally healthy served our countries and they deserve a little respect no matter if they are always strong and perfect or no.

See my point?

But I suggest taking this discussion to the other thread, because it is the better thread for such a discussion and I wanted to use this one the inform people about some vet‘s dislike for fireworks. If you answer my post could you answer in the other thread please.

Well, and could you give an example of what a person who is a coward and has a victim mentality when it comes to fireworks does, because I am not sure if I got you right. Would putting up a sign and expecting your neighbors not to burn fireworks already put a person in this category?

 

[Friday]

Let’s keep this thread on topic, please.

If you wish to respond to something from another thread, please do so in that thread.

Rehashing arguments from other threads will result in a threadban.

 

[Nessa7]

I had an appointment to sign up for psychological testing the day after the 4th of July. It was the first appointment in the morning, so it was about 10 AM when I was done filling out the paperwork and was brought back into the office. They have a set up that was different than anything that I've experienced. After I filled out the stack of papers, they sent me back with this guy that isn't any kind of medical professional, and he went over everything in the peperwork and added things. It was nice, because it didn't matter that I started dissociating too much to really complete the last section that I had to do. It was also difficult because he didn't know the medical terms that I was using. I probably would have gotten more of a description of who he was if it wasn't for the firework situation right when we started.

This place shares a kind of random parking lot with a bar, martial arts studio, a rehab facility, and two other mental health organizations. One of them is for veterans and the other mostly deals with autism. A really small alley cuts between the mental health buildings and the other ones, with the building I'm in being the one right on the alley. We have just sat down when some dumb older teens started setting off fireworks directly outside the window. He had to get up and go outside to ask them to move and do it somewhere else.

Some of the terms that he wasn't familiar with were hypervigilance and startle response. The fireworks made for a good example. I still don't know why someone would pick that random alley out of all the random alleys downtown to set fireworks off in.

 

[Deleted member 487]

This is sometimes true, this is sometimes not true. If you don't think cowards slip through the cracks and make it to the front line, you are naive.

I never said they don't. Quit reading into what I never said.

Until you have walked a mile in my boots, don't pretend to know and to generalize.

I never pretended anything.

This is a very encompassing statement which is not fair or accurate. Some people are some ways, other people are other ways; you have to look at the individual and judge them by their individual actions, not lump them into a group like just because they're veterans they're brave; it's not that simple.

Not for you judge. If you don't like what it said, then don't read it. BTW, I served. Army Honorably discharge.

 

[Virtues]

I never said they don't. Quit reading into what I never said.

I didn't read into what you said, you said this in black and white...

But a coward is never willing to right his or her life in order to save that of their brothers-in-arms

Also getting really tired of the people who are just here to argue. A MAJORITY of the people following this thread understand what I am saying and what I've said over and over again and respect my opinion. However there are a few of you that are teaming up your efforts, and feeding off one another, to attack me. If this is how you want to handle the conversation, I am fine with it, but it shows profound insight into your character.

NEVER EVER CALL A VETERAN A COWARD!!!!!!

And to further prove my point... you say you're just voicing your opinion, if I don't like it then don't read it??? There in big, bold, black, capitalized letters was the title/beginning of your post. "NEVER EVER CALL A VETERAN A COWARD..." that was directed at me (since I'm the only one that used that word in this thread)... so you direct your post at me, then tell me I shouldn't read it... what you're doing is baiting me... I'm not stupid, the mods aren't stupid, the rest of the people reading this thread aren't stupid.

Here's an idea, it's just an idea... Post your own opinion, discuss in a civil way why you agree or disagree with someone else's post, and here's the kicker stop teaming up on people you don't agree with, with people who hold your same opinion @cactus_jack I'm NOT specifically talking about you here, but this thread has gotten completely out of hand. There was even a second thread started to try to recruit support for an opinion that differed from mine. This isn't about expressing a difference in ideas and experiences anymore... It is trying to prove someone wrong... on an opinion none the less. Stop acting like children.

 

[Never_falter2]

@Florian7051 I did not start a second thread to „prove you wrong“. I did because I felt that this one was derailed. See, I started this one to inform civvies who otherwise might not knew that some vets do not like fireworks. Not to judge them or tell them not to burn fireworks but to INFORM them to make informed choices, which might be not burning fireworks several days before or after New Year’s Eve or it may be to do it because they think the pros outweighs the cons. I just wanted to inform and not say in any way that people should not burn fireworks.

I believe you that you did not want to call everybody who was afraid of fireworks or who put a sign on their yard cowards. You were talking about a specific subgroup of people who used their diagnosis for secondary gain and expected all people to change for them instead of getting better or working on themselves, did I get this right?
I respect your opinion but I say this subgroup is very small... and you cannot know if a vet is a member of this group unless you walked a mile in his shoes.

I really do not think we are teaming up on you. We are just stating our opinions just as you do.