What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[ms spock]

I feel anxious and totally overwhelmed.

 

[Tinyflame]

1/2 happy to be on my own next few days; 1/2 not at all (fear, and fear about specific others).

 

[ChildofGod]

ready for positive changes

 

[intothelight]

Happy, hopeful and excited. Been a long, long time since I could write this.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Terrified! An hour and a half away to learn if I have thyroid cancer or not and either way will be going to the hospital to take out this super enlarged thyroid nodule that's closing my windpipe. All terrifying.

 

[Tinyflame]

How did you make out @lostforgottensoul ?

Privately in tears, which no one would have guessed by how I looked publically. And I don't feel one ounce better for it.
Worried to death.
Unable to cope.
Very very alone.

 

[Lionheart]

I feel a little bit tired and lonely, but my doctor started me on a new medication and it has been a really low-pain kind of day for me. (I have fibromyalgia and arthritis). I am hopeful and optimistic for more of the same in the future.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

How did you make out @lostforgottensoul ?

Not thyroid cancer so far but more testing is needed to know 100% that its not cancer.

 

[Tinyflame]

Without hope. Without help, despite trying. I guess I do it wrong? Alone and abandoned, by God and all people. Hollowed out. And on top of it, I have my performance eval tomorrow. Which makes me feel-'great' (not).

I guess passively SI as I walked in to traffic that is supposed to stop but rarely does. Had I been 30 seconds faster would have. Indifferent about that.

Just dumb. Dumb, alone, trapped, no hope. And terrified.











'

 

[ladee]

I can't 'like' that share @Tinyflame, as it sounds like you might want to try to get some serious outside help. I see that you signed out. I can only hope you get the help you deserve. And I do hope to see you here again, sooner rather than later. Or worse, not at all. Sending love and hugs even tho you feel no one cares. I do.

 

[Tinyflame]

Thanks @ladee , I know you do care, for many. I for you too. Funny though, I've thought we'd never recognize each other (on here) if we were on the same street (except I'd expect we'd be hugging the walls!)

You have to deactivate for one year to disable account (or some term like that- permanently close). Great thought (not!) to leave behind nothing but my Epic F*ck'd-up-ness, lol. :rolleyes:

Oh, I tried to get help. But, it's good I couldn't. Because I was thinking, of all the guidance/ questions that have arisen these last ~10 days, the one question wasn't, "do I deserve help?" I would have thought I knew that already- no- don't need that pointed out- but obviously not, or I wouldn't have asked? So shame on me, it is a good lesson I haven't learned. I must think with my feet next time, not my head.

I actually do not fight about who doesn't care. Tbh, it's less of a mind-f than expecting (because of convention) people who are close to (like family, friends), when they actually don't. Just a recipe for cognitive dissonance.

Anyway, no worries, it really doesn't matter at all. Take care, xox. Celebrate like someone having a Bday.. ;):hug:

ETA, I also learned how I felt 35 years ago, since I went through some of the same, including trying for help and the same. So it explains how I feel/ how I felt, and I understand why I chose what I did.

 

[NatBird]

Relieved...it's the end of the day
Lonely...would like a companion to cook for and share the evening with
Accepting...oh well, it is what it is and I don't really know any different
Sad...that this is how it is and I don't really know any different
Anger...at the person who said they were at work and available to talk!