Painting Therapy

[Lady of Longbourn]

I know there are a lot of creative people out there on this forum...

I was going to start a new painting tomorrow (today actually) a big one. 18' by 24' inches, and I think its just going to be one huge puzzle. I can't draw for anything, but I can write. I also did some religious art, that my T and religious leader who's helping me, was really really happy about.

I don't want it to be one of those...I think she trying to say....I can be blunt. And this painting is of pain, angry, shame, guilt, why shouldn't it be just like " whoa...!???? In each puzzle piece I'm going write a word. I want it to be blunt, I want to show everything that I've experience....raw and open.

I've even though of using blood, but that would properly be weird, right?

Any thoughts? I'm sure some of you use art as a type of therapy....

Ayesha

 

[anni]

Oh I think maybe you'd end up regretting using blood later, really. It would probably feel kind of apt and ok at the time but if it's something you wish to keep around for awhile might end up wishing you hadn't? I love the color red, myself. It's symbolic for me, and something I 'took back' from my abuser. It meant blood, of course, but in my head now it means LIFE, vibrancy and beauty, as hokey as that sounds. My whole house is pretty much decorated using red, my little business uses red for things, etc, because it's MY COLOR now and does not mean blood any more.

The painting sounds interesting. I hope some other creative types weigh in-I know there are some true professionals here who have a great eye. My only comment would be to ask yourself before you begin if this is something you are going to hang up, and have in your home to look at every day. If so, it would be a good idea to include some positive bits to the puzzle, and good, strong, bright colors in the mix, you know? it's a great form of therapy, but try to allow yourself the GOOD pieces of yourself also, and perhaps draw them in as larger than the others. If all your pieces consist of the 'bad', it might be sort of reinforcing to look at them everyday. If that's the case, reinforcing with a few 'good' bits would be helpful plus nicer to see in a few years when it's still on your wall!

That's just me, Ayesha. Everyone has to create what works for them in the end, or it's not really creating something, if that makes any sense.

Good luck- it would be nice to see it when it's done, if that's cool with you!

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Well, my plan was to make another one, for the good things...but your idea of adding the bigger good pieces sounds good. But I guess my many goal was to get all those bad negative emotions out, and I don't want it mixed with the good ones ( even though that's how it is in real life)

You right about the blood, would regret it. Still like the idea though...maybe for something else.

Still want to see your art Anni! Oh you did!

 

[Jade-]

Ayesha, I think you should create whatever it takes to get what's in your head into it, even if it means using blood. If that's how bad you hurt, then don't be afraid to express it. Just don't gouge a main artery or anything in the process. Haha.

I like my drawings to be the type where other people look at them and have to wonder what I'm trying to say. That's because I draw them for me, not anyone else. I know exactly what they mean and don't really care if others understand them.

I have a painting from when I was 15 yrs old hanging on my wall. When I walk past it and look at it, I feel what I did at that age. I painted it in art class, the teacher liked it so much he hung it in the hallway for everyone to see. The principal called my mom in just to show it to her. Everyone made a big deal over it and seemed amazed that I had painted it. Nobody really understood what the painting represented though, because if they did, I would have been hospitalized, or at the very least, removed from my home.

Everyone is different in the way they express themselves. I like to be discreet and sneak my thoughts and emotions in my artwork. If you want to be blunt, then go for it. Maybe you can post a picture when you've finished.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

even if it means using blood. If that's how bad you hurt, then don't be afraid to express it. Just don't gouge a main artery or anything in the process. Haha.

LOL...I wont.

But yes, I want/ have to be blunt and raw. I have to speak on the paper, and I really plan too.

I can put up the other painting, but I can't get the picture on the computer...I need to find my camera.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

ahhhhhgggggggg

I can't figure out how to get the words on the painting without messing up the rest of it...help please?

Basical I want to trace the puzzle pieces on to a big paper, the useing black paint trace again. Then careful paint each puzzle piece...but what about the words? My husband said paint them on, but I don't know...or newspaper clippings...that will make it raw too

....or maybe there doesn't have to be words...just puzzle pieces all over the place, some touching some not.

 

[curiouser]

I'm with Anni, I don't think I would use blood. I'm not sure it would work out very well, specially if you were using oil paints. The color would be brown when it dried instead of keeping a bright red color. If you were using acrylic paints and mixed it in with them, I don't think it would even be very visible to anyone.

There are lots of other ways to get creative on a canvas besides just using paint and adding different colors. If you're using acrylic paints there are several different mediums (gels, different texture gels, glazes, iridescence, etc.) you can add to the paint to create different textures, body, sheen, etc. They even make modeling paste that you can add to the canvas to create lightweight 3D layers. You can cut the canvas, burn it a bit, add organic textures/objects from nature, build up areas with paper or fabric, mirrors, you could even add little lights to it. I know I'm getting a little carried away here, but I sort of like the idea of a layered look to reflect the emotional layers that you are experiencing.

As far as being blunt and raw, nothing represents you better than a self portrait. I was attending a private art college when I experienced my trauma, a couple weeks after it happened I had a single source lighting self portrait assignment in one of my drawing classes. I choose to draw myself by candlelight in my closet holding a knife up to my lips, it was a memory from my trauma. I put myself in one of the same positions as the murderer and it was an interesting feeling to say the least. I really liked the dramatic contrast between the sharp lines of the blade of the knife pressed against my soft lips. It's the only artwork I ever did regarding my trauma.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

What else can your write with on oil painting ?

I know there's lots out there, but like a sharpie, maybe India ink...? Maybe a knife...I could cut the words in! thats an idea...

can't think today...need a teacher that's for sure

Maybe I'll use blood in a different painting

 

[kers]

Sharpie makes oil-based markers; you can find them at craft stores. They come in different sizes (skinny point and fat point) and those might work on oil paints. I think the idea of carving words into the paint is excellent, too.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

I started the painting. Changed it a little. No words. I think the way I'm arranging the puzzle pieces speak for them self's. Just not sure how I'm going to paint the thing with the pieces outline still showing clearly. It HAS to show my clear. Maybe I just wont paint the outline...hmmm...

I love it...I've never really had anything that I do, that I make, for me, that my heart leads.Painting does that. I come up with something in my head, and I paint it. Or figure out how. my husband likes to paint, and he kept giving advice, which I totally ignored. He wasn't getting it.

I already have 2 more in mind, that I want to do. Another religious, and another one of pain. I'm going to like the pain one, It's going to be very simple, with words, and little else....but can you cut canvas or slash it?

 

[anni]

You can do anything at all you want-there are no rules. BTW- there are tons of rub-on, or decal-type lettering you can get in any art store, or anywhere on the internet. I'm like you- I can do lettering but it makes me crazy ( and half blind). There are SO many different kinds of script, too- you could certainly express yourself that way, also.
They come in alll sizes, colors, types, etc, and stick on the work. I think they'd work on oil, although might need a glaze of clear-coat when the work is completed.

Hee! Jadebear's artery thing made me laugh, too-good one!

Yes, I'd not thought about how blood turns a basically unattractive color-although good point with your husband as an example. Advice is tough to give to others who are creating something-it's SO yours! The self-portrait thing stops some people since noone thinks they are 'good' enough to draw themselves. It doesn't matter- whatever it ends up being, will be representative plus awfully healing. I've never had a student who said 'I can't draw', who really could not in the end! Boy, it would actually be very cool to see this puzzle, and curiouser's self portrait, and Jadebear's expressive work. You've started a really insightful thread, Ayesha.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

Here's my first painting...it's religious, and in Arabic. It says Allah, which means God. View attachment 3713

when I was painting it, I wanted the arabic to be more...clean I guess. but then I found i LIKED making mistakes, because it didn't see them as mistakes. More like character. Like where the colors mix, or the white overflows on to the colors. I liked it. :)

My T was so excited to see this...he was like keep painting, keep painting and then paint more... its better then hurting yourself