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What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

Totally get this. I had these feelings when I was younger. Don't let him abuse you further. My first husbAnd beat me up all the time, really bad. I lost one job that would kill me forever ( career wise) because of coming in with bruises or having to call in. He's dead now.. We were divorced for a long time. He died at 44 years old. Looked like he was 108.

Today, I know that I have to start walking again. I keep putting it off because I'm burned out on the treadmill so I ordered an inspirational audio book to help me. I did walk an hour last week on treadmill. I slipped because I was so bored ( watching tv while doing it) that I might have to get the treadmill serviced now. We'll see.
I’m sorry you had to go through that. I am glad that you are healing.
 
Today, I am feeling empowered. I told my husband last night, “I am not, have not, will never be responsible for getting you to work because you are an adult.” Even though I got the silent treatment this morning, I smiled because I see what he’s doing. I will not be intimidated into being his puppet anymore. I gave him 2 days to either secure a ride from a co-worker or he’s gonna have to Uber. I’ve actually set a boundary 👏 “I am too good to be someone’s 2nd choice.” —Anonymous
 
I know it's going to be a very hard, demanding work day, so one part resignation and one part sheer prayer and resolve I hope I can get through it. I always pray survive it, which sounds dramatic but I do mean get through it, in all it's forms, and hopefully my body will last. What to do with 2 reserve and 12 demands

Sad that I ever spoke up about my needs. All my life on my part it's been peaceful without them, except for no peace with fear. But non fear-based needs or my own needs are not worth it. I see I have a harder time dealing with disappointment or betrayal than I do ignoring my own needs. I think one learns that with required neglect, likely there wasn't the intention by some people to neglect. But it had to be repeated since there weren't other options.. Trying anything else doesn't help, anyway. For me, I mean. I guess because people have to care to meet you in the middle, but that means they have to care about your needs. Others needs and emotions have always taken precedence. Plus, others have great needs. I feel like I will be better suited going back to how I thought and lived before. I provide a lot of comfort to others (so they say), can make people laugh/ forget, been told I provide good support, been told I help other people's dreams come true, been told by co-worokers in jobs past that I'm the reason they come in to work. I don't care for fighting, rarely get my temper up, usually can forgive or genuinely just forget. We can't speak up at work either or disagree or it's insubordination. And my own life or needs are my pblm.
 
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