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I am in the light at the end of the tunnel

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Janet Anne

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After months of needing to visit my elderly mother to give my brother time off, I am here, feeling very relieved to be with my family after months of isolation and resulting mental health problems

My brother is my mother’s official carer every day, seven days a week for eight hours at her house,

He he lives nearby but is never actually off duty, as my mum can ring at any time when his shift ends and before it begin. For many years now, I have taken over looking after my mum for two days a week which is time off from the responsibility that my brother badly needs as there is no one else who can take care of her ... however, since total lockdown in December I was not legally allowed to travel and I am not legally a care worker.

I have seen my family under so much stress with no respite and have been desperate to get here to give my brother time off, the conflict has all but driven me insane. Over months I have become more irritable, impatient and intolerant, suffered dreadful insomnia, plagued my fears about my brothers health and ability to cope with constant responsibility and little rest.

I wondered why I was so angry, I became increasingly isolated and unable to engage with other people I am in 12 step fellowship for over four decades but was unable to speak in my meetings, I have often felt mentally ill and unable to cope with the conflict of being willing to travel to help my loved ones but not being able due to covid restrictions. I arrived here yesterday and my brother is off duty i am enjoying my mums company and she is happy to have me here. I have slept four times in two days one time was for eight hours, all night long.

I never understood that needing to take care of another person could affect my mental health and general functioning so seriously but I have suddenly started to feel well again... it is so good to read the honest feelings expressed on here thank you so much for this opportunity to share.
 
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Welcome to the community!

Who has PTSD? You, your mother, your brother?
Myself I tried to write my story and history on here a while ago but I was never posted and I didn’t understand why so I thought I would write something general under a heading. I suffer with PTSD where can I write my story please ? I found it very confusing where it is supposed to go. I was looking for the right place to write it on and off since I joined
Thank you
 
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