Hey everyone!
I just recently had a really bad situation regarding my partner and dont really know what to do...
One night it was 10:30pm and I was trying to sleep. My partner continued watching a youtube video on the TV in the bedroom and it was really loud and kept me awake. I put a pillow over my head to deafen it a little. Next thing I noticed was the weird rhythmic movement of her masturbating in bed right next time me, sort of hearing it too. I started spiraling and trying to ignore it but it threw me into a barrage of flashbacks to when I was sexually abuses by my brother way back when.
It went on like that for half an hour and I ended up whimpering, shaking, crying, until my partner finally noticed me not feeling well. For almost an hour I laid and sat there in silence feeling afraid and like crap. I didnt talk to her about it right then and there since I needed to get sleep so I could work the next day. I did eventually lay down again and sleep.
The next day I told her all about it, and that I noticed that she was masturbating right next to me and that triggered my Trauma. Though she "seemed" understanding, she then told me what I felt and noticed wasnt at all what I did, and that she was just "stimming".
Which in all honesty...I know when she stimms, I know what it feels and sounds and looks like. That was not stimming. And quite frankly, I dont know or understand why my partner feels the need to lie to me and gaslight me into thinking it wasnt that way.
Every since having talked to her about it, I left it at that and didnt discuss it any further. No incident happened since but her lying to me leaves me with a rather sour feeling...
What would you guys do in this situation?? (they are not a bad person at all, in fact they are the healthiest partner for me I have ever had...ehich is why this kinda threw me off...)
I just recently had a really bad situation regarding my partner and dont really know what to do...
One night it was 10:30pm and I was trying to sleep. My partner continued watching a youtube video on the TV in the bedroom and it was really loud and kept me awake. I put a pillow over my head to deafen it a little. Next thing I noticed was the weird rhythmic movement of her masturbating in bed right next time me, sort of hearing it too. I started spiraling and trying to ignore it but it threw me into a barrage of flashbacks to when I was sexually abuses by my brother way back when.
It went on like that for half an hour and I ended up whimpering, shaking, crying, until my partner finally noticed me not feeling well. For almost an hour I laid and sat there in silence feeling afraid and like crap. I didnt talk to her about it right then and there since I needed to get sleep so I could work the next day. I did eventually lay down again and sleep.
The next day I told her all about it, and that I noticed that she was masturbating right next to me and that triggered my Trauma. Though she "seemed" understanding, she then told me what I felt and noticed wasnt at all what I did, and that she was just "stimming".
Which in all honesty...I know when she stimms, I know what it feels and sounds and looks like. That was not stimming. And quite frankly, I dont know or understand why my partner feels the need to lie to me and gaslight me into thinking it wasnt that way.
Every since having talked to her about it, I left it at that and didnt discuss it any further. No incident happened since but her lying to me leaves me with a rather sour feeling...
What would you guys do in this situation?? (they are not a bad person at all, in fact they are the healthiest partner for me I have ever had...ehich is why this kinda threw me off...)
