What to Expect Between Trauma Therapy Appointments & What’s Normal?

[Rachel541]

Hi, I went through domestic trauma for 12 years. I am working through it with a psych and wanted to know how people feel between trauma based therapy appointments and what's normal. I often get flashbacks, withdraw, want to isolate and go quiet. I usually like chatting but lately I don't have much to say. Is this normal? Some days I can feel really low, especially after a psych appointment. And I try as best as I can to get through them also. Sometimes they are really tough. This is all new to me (1.5 months) so looking for some reassurance from others who have been there or are there. Thanks

 

[Teamwork]

Key phrase in what you wrote is, I am working it through. This is pretty much the response to opening up in office to someone then we close down after. Maybe we are processing. I have learned to go to an appointment then log as much of it in my notepad app afterwards. This does two things for me. Helps me keep track of what came up and what he said about it as well as helps me not to ruminate too much inside my head. Usually takes me a few days after an appointment to settle.

 

[arfie]

talking about my trauma and the related responses is a guaranteed psych trigger in my own case. the critical diff between the random triggers of every day life and the intentionally provoked triggers i experience in therapy is the support i have in working them through. when jane doe reminds me of a particularly mean perpetrator i endured in the kiddie whorehouses, i have zero support and find myself lost and alone in lala land. in psychotherapy, i am not alone with these monsters from the past. i have compassionate support and healing hopes in working through the flashbacks, et al.

 

[Movingforward10]

For me, it got worse before it got better.
It's opening a can of worms, however gently that can is being opened, and it's learning to do that in small bite sized chunks so that you can process and move forward.
So it's normal to feel low, be less motivated to do things. It's your mind and body healing.

The process surely and truly sucks.
But getting through this bit to the healing bit: it is worth it.

 

[Rachel541]

Key phrase in what you wrote is, I am working it through. This is pretty much the response to opening up in office to someone then we close down after. Maybe we are processing. I have learned to go to an appointment then log as much of it in my notepad app afterwards. This does two things for me. Helps me keep track of what came up and what he said about it as well as helps me not to ruminate too much inside my head. Usually takes me a few days after an appointment to settle.

Yeah everything seems to spike for at least 2-3 days after too. Thanks for sharing that.

For me, it got worse before it got better.
It's opening a can of worms, however gently that can is being opened, and it's learning to do that in small bite sized chunks so that you can process and move forward.
So it's normal to feel low, be less motivated to do things. It's your mind and body healing.

The process surely and truly sucks.
But getting through this bit to the healing bit: it is worth it.

Thanks for your encouragement. Means a lot. And yes it has felt like it's getting worse at the moment.

 

[Freddyt]

Yeah everything seems to spike for at least 2-3 days after too.

The famed Therapy Hangover. You didn't mention what therapy you are doing but all of them even "talk therapy" have their price to pay afterword.

Learning what affects you most lets you plan a little for the days after therapy. You can't prepare for everything but you can start learning the skills you need in your toolbox to deal with those days. For me - it's not adding stress for a start, so eating, drinking, self care, rest (even if it isn't sleep) and its also grounding, and things to help stay away from rumination.

One of the big ones is learning to pace your therapy. Mine is EMDR and talk. So we haven't done EMDR for a couple months because we (I refer to my T and I as we) did some heavy work on anger and I know the signs of reprocessing work for myself. Piling more EMDR work on will make me far less functional right now so in the meantime we do talk therapy. I find it really helpful because I get "PTSD Blind" and can't see things that seem very obvious sometimes.

But it also helps to spread out EMDR or other therapy work because the problem most people get into and don't realize is they go charging along in therapy until "PTSD Strikes Back" and they end up nearly non functioning and overwhelmed. Any therapy takes its own time you can't just push and rush through it. My T said this last week that's where most of her patients get into trouble. You push PTSD, and it shoves back.....

 

[Rachel541]

The famed Therapy Hangover. You didn't mention what therapy you are doing but all of them even "talk therapy" have their price to pay afterword.

Learning what affects you most lets you plan a little for the days after therapy. You can't prepare for everything but you can start learning the skills you need in your toolbox to deal with those days. For me - it's not adding stress for a start, so eating, drinking, self care, rest (even if it isn't sleep) and its also grounding, and things to help stay away from rumination.

One of the big ones is learning to pace your therapy. Mine is EMDR and talk. So we haven't done EMDR for a couple months because we (I refer to my T and I as we) did some heavy work on anger and I know the signs of reprocessing work for myself. Piling more EMDR work on will make me far less functional right now so in the meantime we do talk therapy. I find it really helpful because I get "PTSD Blind" and can't see things that seem very obvious sometimes.

But it also helps to spread out EMDR or other therapy work because the problem most people get into and don't realize is they go charging along in therapy until "PTSD Strikes Back" and they end up nearly non functioning and overwhelmed. Any therapy takes its own time you can't just push and rush through it. My T said this last week that's where most of her patients get into trouble. You push PTSD, and it shoves back.....

Thanks you gave such a clear explanation of it all. I am doing EMDR too and have always felt bad when I fall apart at a session and can't do EMDR, but you're helping me see it from another point of view. Perhaps I need a bit more space between the EMDR. And to be OK with that.

My T recently went on holidays and sent me into a pretty difficult place as there was an extra week off. So I rang some helplines to help me through it. I am glad that this is common between sessions, whether the T is away or not. It sometimes makes it harder to go back and do it all again.

 

[Freddyt]

Thanks you gave such a clear explanation of it all. I am doing EMDR too and have always felt bad when I fall apart at a session and can't do EMDR, but you're helping me see it from another point of view. Perhaps I need a bit more space between the EMDR. And to be OK with that.

It's a difficult thing to do for sure. I start my day by making breakfast for myself. If I'm ending up with coffee cream in my OJ and OJ on my hash browns, it's a sign that my general function is a bit impaired and its likely we need to lay off EMDR.

There are lots of signs and if you pay attention to how you feel and function you will learn when it's a good time and when its not a good time to do more EMDR. You will also learn to take a break now and then, even when you are ready to do more work, just to have some "good time" to see how far you have come and to have time to do stuff....

If you do you learn better where your limit of doing stuff is, and you can figure out what is worth doing if it's going to affect you after (Like Christmas or parties or family events or events with friends) and plan to have the effects bleed over for a few days afterword.

This place helps me a lot between visits. There are many here who are quite experienced with therapy and its effects and many who can offer ways to work with and control symptoms.