Positive And Neutral Flashbacks

[p-no]

Hi all,

I wonder if I'm the only one who has experienced positive and neutral flashbacks?

A common theme with me in that respect is for example perfume. I have one particular perfume that, if I smell it by chance somewhere out while on my way somewhere, will send me into a flashback. The perfume is something I love and something I got in a positive context, i.e. not connected to any abuse whatsoever. So, what happens is, I walk down a street, a women passes by, I smell this particular perfume and I'm back in Canada. Nothing bad happens "there"; it's just that I have to orientate myself and it makes my heart race and confuses me and I need to consciously focus on the "here", e.g. the buildings around me, the people, the language they speak, noises, etc. to find out where I am. "Find out where I am" is saying too much, but for a lack of better words... I chose "positive flashback" for this, because it actually takes me back to a time and place I love, with a smell I love! Besides the heart racing and confusion, it's a positive experience.

Neutral follows the same example. I.e. no abuse or bad involved, but still a flashback.

Does anybody know this from their own experience? (Please... :unsure:)

Thanks.

 

[Leah123]

Hello! Yes, I definitely have this experience from time to time, and much more often recently, since I've been talking about my childhood with my therapist. One example, from about one month ago- I was at my daughter's little league game, started thinking about something unpleasant, and decided to take a walk to shake it off.

Suddenly, walking through the park, I felt completely transported to a park I spent many years at as a child. I was "in" the gymnasium, listening to my father and friends play basketball on one of the courts. I could hear the squeak of the ball and smell the sweat of the men as they played. The immersion was deep, the detail, quite vivid. I actually described it to my therapist afterward as time travel, one way, no interaction, but time travel nonetheless- emotional and mental reliving.

 

[Abstract]

I don't Prime_No but I have seen three people (other than you and Leah) discuss this.

 

[p-no]

I'm pretty relieved, I must say, phew :) Thank you for your replies. And Abstract, I searched before I posted and didn't find anything with "positive" or "neutral flashback", but I have no clue what that would be called. Good to know there are others! :)

time travel

Leah, before I knew what everything was called PTSD-wise (e.g. that a flashback was a flashback), I called things differently because I needed to explain it to people and didn't have the "official" terms. So, flashbacks I refered to as "time travelling" from as early on as I can remember! It IS a form of time travel, even the negative flashbacks are to me!

As some things are not PTSD things, I wonder if this is. I don't think "normal" (neurotypical) people do this, but then again, maybe they do, too, and we just have the negative flashbacks because we have trauma? No clue...

Thanks again for posting, and I hope that positive park flashback was a good one that brought what you needed at the time! I love those perfume ones, it's like sending me off to my happy (I prefer peaceful) place (imagination) in no time! :)

 

[Leah123]

It's so funny you said this:

Leah, before I knew what everything was called PTSD-wise (e.g. that a flashback was a flashback), I called things differently because I needed to explain it to people and didn't have the "official" terms. So, flashbacks I refered to as "time travelling" from as early on as I can remember! It IS a form of time travel, even the negative flashbacks are to me!

because, having YOU just write about it in *terms* of flashbacks, gave me a huge AHA moment, which I just wrote my therapist about. It's a long story, but, I just wanted to say, your post helped me too.

I have no idea as to whether other, non-PTSD sufferers, have these... somehow... I think it's uncommon... to have such depth of recollection that it feels like swimming in the ocean of memory, rather than just observing from the dock, but I could well be wrong.

 

[p-no]

Thanks for sharing, Leah!

Very well worded, that "depth of recollection so that it feels like swimming in the ocean of memory"...

 

[franciemarnie]

How I love the positive flashbacks. The time travel that is happy, or that give me the feeling that I have a part of me back that had been gone. So many years of nothingness or fight or flight. So few moments until recent years where I could feel visceral joy hearing an old song, or smelling my grandmother's perfume.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I find it odd that someone would question a positive flashback? Are things not supposed to remind us of the past, good or bad?

Maybe you should do some EMDR to tame those out of control positive flashbacks! ;)

 

[Leah123]

I don't find it odd at all, and I figure there's quite a difference between things that remind me of the past, where I see them more like.... what I consider typical memories, faded, old, like Polaroid snapshots, rather than flashbacks, which are closer but even more intense than the 3-d movies. I like to know if I'm normal (I know the arguments that I should be strong enough not to care, and that there is no normal, but.... I think those are oversimplifications). I like to know if others have shared the experiences I have, and where they fall on the spectrum of experience- common to everyone, common to sufferers, unique to me? Also, I like to know what experiences might be related to trauma and which ones aren't. It's part of my learning process and how I connect with others, and put things in context. Some might say, that doesn't matter, but... personally, sometimes it does. :)

 

[p-no]

Would love to "like" your post a hundred times, Leah! I wish I could word it as well as you have. Thanks!

 

[Abstract]

I'm pretty relieved, I must say, phew :) T

I know that feeling and the relief so well Prime No! So many times I have felt like that especially since I discussed so little for so long. It's astonishing how helpful it is isn't it? And if something is a little unusual it can be very stressful risking it as I have found that people often misunderstand because they assume what one is saying is not really what one is saying. It's happened often to me in regards to dissociative stuff. I'm glad that hasn't happened here. It always helps me feel less crazy when I realise others do something too! Feeling crazy seems to be my default mode. ;)

 

[Leah123]

Feeling crazy seems to be my default mode. ;)

Lol, you and me both! It's been a recurring theme of therapy, but I've finally decided to try and give up that word. I'm way too interesting, successful and just... cool, to be boring old crazy.