What Are You Feeling Today? Not Thinking, Rather Feeling! Can You Identify Yours?

[DMerish]

Today, my daughter-in-law came over to talk about plans for (now 100ppl) birthday party for my soon to be 3 year old grand-daughter, I cleaned the house, did a bunch or errands and saw an old (male) friend. It was probably the most "normal" day I've had in nine months, and it felt good despite last night's sleep being interrupted. I'm excited and a bit apprehensive about the large party coming up on Sunday :unsure:

 

[therisa]

Anger, as I look at the address label of the envelope, I received from my doctor's office, yesterday.

 

[DMerish]

It's Saturday morning (where I am). One day before the big birthday party. Excitement over the upcoming party tomorrow is waning; my apprehension is becoming more nervous like. I'll have my grand-daughter beginning early this afternoon and overnight (so my son and daughter-in-law can decorate). Four out of town friends are coming to my place for dinner - there will be eight of us in all. I have committed to do more things for this upcoming party than I have committed to all year, and I'm feeling a bit scared . . . My family and friends are thankful for beginning to have me back in their lives. When in remission (which I am becoming closer and closer to), I'm "The Resourceful One", "The Listener", "The Peacekeeper" and "The Rock". I leave little for myself. Few come to my aid. I don't know whether I don't allow this because part of me feels it needs to maintain "the image" but I know it needs to change. Why the F did I take on so much?

 

[Britt.f7]

I actually woke up happy, positive! That hasn't happened in ages. I'm trying to maintain that feeling throughout the day. Not even going to question why I did.

 

[CraftyCath]

Still have a nasty headache and feel awful but I know I just have to ride it out. If it doesn't get better I will have to go to the doctors - again! I should just move in there permanently and save money on travel!

 

[cavy]

I feel very frightened & depressed & haven't had the motivation to do anything - but for fear of getting into trouble big time I have had to. .:arghh;

These feelings are echoes of my past, very powerful echoes. I don't have the willpower or motivation to fight them, have tried to sleep which sometimes helps but not this time. :(:banghead:

 

[BlackbirdSinging]

Anxious. Hypervigilant. Nervous. Scared. Rejected. Hurt. Sad. Frustrated.

 

[Nebulustrix]

Tense. Anxious. Irritated. Impatient. Tired.

 

[DMerish]

Sunday evening. The party for my three year old grand-daughter is over. It was quite a success and I survived, except for a couple of exchanges with my daughter (who triggers me). I'm exhausted, very annoyed about those exchanges and hope the matter doesn't disturb my (much needed : ) sleep.

 

[roaminggnome]

I am starting to feel better. I'm taking small steps but at least they are steps towards healing.

 

[Abstract]

Ok. Been attempting to pretend it isn't happening but have an appointment to have the lump checked in breast. At last. Tomorrow morning. Shall just try to continue ignoring it. It has worked quite well until about half an hour ago.

 

[BlackbirdSinging]

Many many big hugs to you Abstract :hug:.