Narcissists: People Persuading You To Develop Ptsd

[CrazyHorse]

You now cause your own suffering, you have no control over your own suffering so you best not think about or speak out about the abuse. Hmmm, I don't really see where you are coming from here. It seems like you are adding 2 and 2 and coming up with 7

It is Melanie Tonia Evans words, not mine. That is where it is coming from.

 

[Philippa]

I'd have to listen to that particular vid, but that doesn't sound anything like what she was saying in other stuff I've read and listened to from her. Do you know the title of the video? I'd like to hear it for myself.

 

[CrazyHorse]

Of course :-) It is called: 'Narccisistic abouse- how it occures and how to overcome it.'

 

[Thinkingman85]

All that I want is my old normal habits back. I don't want to be who I used to be just a few qualities that shouldn't have disappeared. For example, it always seems like the universe is working against me. I woke up and my normal habitual behavior was to put on my glasses and turn on the light. However, the light was on and my glasses are lost. I get close to crying because I haven't been able to feel like I fit in life. Something is out of alignment. I think there is a subconscious belief that is leading me toward destruction. My past was dark and something from it won't let go.

 

[Philippa]

That sounds like a scary experience, but I think sometimes that seeing these things opens you up to looking at it, and possibly deconstructing the belief and using critical thinking, rewrite what you want it to be instead. Talk yourself out of it basically. Maybe look at what you may not want to give up in holding onto those beliefs...some kind of pay off for keeping them? I like to think those things we think we've lost are still there for us to reclaim at some point, but I don't know for sure in all cases,so...If you'are aware of it though, then you can change it. Letting go can be the hardest thing to do sometimes. I never had this much trouble when I was in my early twenties, letting go of stuff...but it hadn't accumulated too much at that stage.

 

[Thinkingman85]

I'm aware of what causes me pain. My brother used me like an object. He has no regard for me as a human being. It has been this way my whole life. I've been making music since I was 14. He knows how passionate I am about it and I am stilled called a wannabe Eminem. He does this intentionally to hurt me. He manipulated my emotions by pushing my buttons so far that the only option was either to fight or leave. I left. I KNOW that the only way he will know not to disrespect me is to severely hurt him. There is no other way. He is a narcissist. He doesn't care. He enjoys my suffering. That is the reality. How can you reclaim yourself when there is someone in the world that knows how to attack you emotionally to the point of where your life feels threatened? I was happy with who I was until my buttons got pushed so much that I had a nervous breakdown. There is no solution except letting the abusers know to never push my buttons again... and no, it's not "you have a choice to let them push your buttons". These people know your weaknesses. You can't have a Buddha mindset while you are being mistreated.

 

[Thinkingman85]

I'm talking to Zain Arcane tomorrow. His insights have been much more helpful than therapy. He has online videos about narcissistic abuse.

 

[Philippa]

I would never say you have a choice to let them push your buttons or not. Family often know what buttons to push better than anyone, because they know us so intimately. I was only saying that I like to think that it's possible to reclaim parts that we think are lost...I didn't say it's an easy thing though, and it is impossible when someone like that is around you.

My brother is the same. I know he views me with complete indifference. 20 years of being continuously disrespected by him has proven that beyond a shadow of a doubt. The final straw was when he proposed that I perform in a home made porn film with the woman he was using for sex at the time...while he film it!

 

[Thinkingman85]

Wow, that is crazy. Sorry to hear that. I agree with you completely about reclaiming yourself. The problem arises when the narc knows how to attack the parts you are trying to reclaim. That is the reason they are lost in the first place... because the narc damaged them so bad.

 

[Philippa]

She looked like me apparently. It took me 20 years to finally admit that my little brother is a creep.

 

[Thinkingman85]

I think my bro is a creep also. I woke up one morning and he was standing in a corner staring at me. I asked him what he was doing and he said that he had to get clothes out of the closet. He acted like everything was normal. I'm pretty sure it was gaslighting.

 

[Philippa]

Sounds weird alright!