My bedroom is messy

[radicalgratitude]

I have two older brothers and one of the many things they taught me when I was little was how to set up traps. I was thoroughly excited about this skill. I tried it out on my dad. I remember that night. I heard his dreaded footsteps as he climbed the stairs; I heard him turn the corner toward my bed. Then I heard it: *Crash!* "Oh...ouch!"

It worked! I smiled in my bed. My dad didn't molest me that night. The next day, my mom told me to put away the trap. I lied and said I made the trap for bad guys from outside our house. Overtime, I realized that having a messy room kept me safe. If people don't know where to step, it will prevent them from stepping in there.

When my room is clean, I feel much calmer, less embarrassed, and I'm able to find things. Unfortunately, I also feel unsafe, even though my dad is far away from me. Does anyone know of ways to feel safe in a clean room? The part of me that likes it clean is tired of this.

 

[Meg_porter94]

Try putting a bat or something near your bed. For me during the night mares it made me feel a little safer knowing that I had something next to me to protect myself.

Also, I would think if you could make a floor mat even if it is cardboard but hot glue some legos or tacs down to it, and lay it out right in front of the door. It would help you as to if someone comes in your room while you are sleeping they are going to step on some painfull stuff. Then in turn would wake you up to call the cops. It will also help because you would be the only one who knows it is there. Also you will be able to pick it up and move it when you need to!

Because I mean seriously have you ever stepped on legos or tacs?

It is not a nice feeling.

 

[Barconian]

@radicalgratitude What a wonderful defence mechanism, your clever :)

 

[Loner]

That is clever. Now though, if there were some sort of intruder, I am not sure a messy room would stop him?

You could get (a) dog(s) or weapons? If you're going to keep a weapon though, make sure you are capable of using it, both training wise and emotionally, because if not it becomes a liability to you if anything ever happens.

 

[digger]

Try putting a bat or something near your bed

I seriously need more sleep....It took me several readings of that to realise you weren't talking about a wee furry critter with wings and trying to work out how that might help ;) Although perhaps a vampire bat?....

You can get kids electronics kits that you can make an intruder alarm for your door for. Or my son had a spy kit once that had motion sensors in it. Perhaps if you still like the trap idea something like that would work?

 

[radicalgratitude]

Thank you, everyone! I never thought of going back to traps! I think this will work! Time to clean my room....

 

[Loner]

There are some serious legal issues with setting up a trap that could hurt someone, fyi. Motion sensors tied to an alarm system that then allow you to utilize a weapon such as a firearm are more legally protected, but I strongly recommend not setting up any kind of trap that could actually hurt someone.

 

[radicalgratitude]

Hmm...I'll have to keep thinking...I like the legos idea...

 

[radicalgratitude]

I've got it! Bubble wrap! I'll be able to hear them coming and I have some mad self defense skills! I can just lay it out across my floor each night!

 

[digger]

I've got it! Bubble wrap!

Love it :D

 

[Spiderallis]

Would protective amulets help you to feel safer? Superstitious things are silly to some people, but it makes me feel safer if I hang up the right things in the right spots and sprinkle a little salt around.

 

[SeanCharles]

Ah ha! I wonder...

This has always been a struggle with me. I don't know if the ADHD, tied with disassociation and the PTSD have factored into the messy room situation which drove my parents crazy. I now wonder if the trauma had somehow tied into this even though my abuse never occurred in my own bedroom. Then again maybe disorganized was as it were more comfortable than clutter-free? This definitely has me wondering even more...