Ptsd: It's Not A Competition

[yoshixvx]

I'm probably going to get a lot of sh*t for posting about this topic, but it's been bothering me for weeks now and I need to get it off my chest. I try my best not to judge people, and unless they tell me their story, I don't really provide feedback or advice unless asked. But I am confused and angry as to why people do this, and maybe someone can shed some light on how to cope or see it from a different perspective.

I don't know whether PTSD has just become the "diagnosis du jour" because of the media coverage or because people see it as an opportunity for attention/access to medication and so on, but there seems to be an increasingly alarming rate of people claiming they have PTSD (not specifically on here, but on the internet in general). Even more disturbing are the amount of people who self-diagnose because they've filled out a questionnaire or read something that they think applies to them - with no intention to see a psychiatrist or therapist, and basically just to say they have PTSD because they think it makes them special or to get attention from others.

Actual comments I have read/heard:

"I was walking my dog and a dog across the street growled at us, and now I think I have PTSD."
"My teacher yelled at me in front of the entire class and gave me PTSD."
"My girlfriend cheated on me, I have PTSD from that."

As someone on the near-extreme end of the posttraumatic spectrum, I can't really relate or validate these experiences, especially when they are not backed by a medical diagnosis. I also understand that not everyone is going to have gone through the same things as I have - which is great, because I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy. Additionally, I think that the posttraumatic spectrum is pretty straightforward (PTSD-CPTSD-DID), and it states in the DSM that "Most people (more than half) will experience at least one traumatizing event in their lifetime." Not surprising, because life is stressful. This doesn't mean that you will develop PTSD from it - you may fall into depression, develop a fear of revisiting said experience, or isolate from society, but I don't believe you can develop PTSD from the above examples.

I realize this may sound dismissive to some, but the reality is that we live in a society that still stigmatizes those with mental illness, and people who do this do not make it easier on those who suffer greatly. It hinders our access to resources, our right to be taken seriously, and to be treated with respect.

Most of all, it's not a competition. This is not about "one-upping" each other to win the gold in the PTSD Olympics. It's about acknowledging the damage these pervasive comments inflict on those who are trying to be validated and heal their (real) emotional and psychological wounds.

I urge those who think they have PTSD to see a psychiatrist for a proper assessment and possible diagnosis. Just because something sounds like a pattern you may experience, doesn't qualify you for an official label (believe me, I have thought I had cancer so many times - thanks WEBMD!). Unless you have dedicated 7+ years of your life to learning about mental illness and helping others, I don't think you should be self-inflicting diagnoses - or even, worse.. labeling/encouraging others to do the same. There are many reasons why doctors exist (and no, it's not always to torment us with ineptitude), and why they are the only ones qualified to treat and help you. You have the right to bring your experiences to the table, but don't walk in expecting to be labeled as something. And if you don't agree, get a second opinion. But the internet is full of opinions about things and if you base your life upon the opinions of others, you will be setting yourself up for a future that always depends on the validation of external sources. The trick is that some of them exist for very good reasons, and others exist to torment you into thinking you are something you are not. This is, in my experience, the most important reason to always question everything, even if you think you are right - including mental health and the labels you willingly adopt and use to form your identity.

/rant

 

[The Albatross]

Personally, I buck my diagnosis at nearly every turn... but the body reactions tell the tale.

 

[shimmerz]

Good rant @yoshixvx! For people that I know that has PTSD there (to me) is no distinction (for me) as to what is a 'worse' trauma. Trauma is debilitating and never an easy thing when working through it. But for those who like to use PTSD as a means of attention etc, well I think it does damage to those of us who really suffer from it. The bad press etc does not help those of us who truly are needing appropriate help.

 

[yoshixvx]

@The Albatross I am the same.. I really have a love/hate relationship with labels, but I understand that they define the quality of assistance I will get in any given area of my life. Unfortunately, they are necessary.. even if/when I want to believe them or not. Idiosyncrasies aside, I think many of us have particular things in common that back these labels up (sometimes too eerily at times). It's a chicken/egg scenario and as you said, our bodies/minds tell the tale, regardless of the label.

 

[The Albatross]

Just an FYI though (for your information) ... I did a professional business woman's conference once where the speaker had a bunch of "post its". And asked us all (about 200 women) to write out labels on them. As she spoke she had us stick them on her. She ended up covered with yellow blue and pink post its. As she red the labels... it made me realize that a lot of the burden I carried was self imposed.

In a book somewhere in my reading, someone did a "scape goat" exercise similar to above. A painting was created, a coat used and the "labels" were stuck to that. There was a ceremony of sorts and a sharing of the participants. Some women elected to destroy their "scape goats", some kept them as a reminder, and some just threw it in the trash. Whenever I see a coat now, I think of the post its and the labels I put on myself.

 

[mytai]

the amount of people who self-diagnose because they've filled out a questionnaire or read something that they think applies to them - with no intention to see a psychiatrist or therapist

I think this comment is key. It is fine to do online questionnaires or wonder if you have something after you've read an article, but then you need to take it to your doctor and say "hey I read this and I feel like I fit some of what it says". Let them decide whether or not you exhibit symptoms, or actually have said "thing".

Like many on here I have a love/hate relationship with labels and diagnoses. Part of me wants to know the label so I can get the appropriate help and know how to deal with it, the other part of me doesn't want to hear it because I find it debilitating in a way. I have been diagnosed by 3 or 4 psychiatrists with PTSD over 13 years, I recently received an updated diagnosis of PTSD, GAD, MDD, and Bipolar NOS. Do those all necessarily fit me, I don't really know, I believe the PTSD, and GAD (generalized anxiety disorder), but I have a hard time accepting the MDD (major depressive disorder) and Bipolar NOS diagnosis. They are professionals for a reason, but they also don't see me on a day-to-day basis. I would trust my T's opinion (although she can't legally diagnose me) more than a psychiatrist I just met. I take my diagnoses to her, and trust her opinion on whether she thinks they fit or are just more symptoms of my PTSD.

 

[open eyes]

You summed up all of my thoughts & feelings toward this subject exactly. The part about how people who self diagnose make us real sufferers be taken less seriously makes me especially angry. This happens with a lot of mental illnesses. It makes me furious.

 

[WillyKat]

What baffles me is why anyone would *want* to have "PTSD" for a label. Is it yet another middle school fad that I've missed out on?

I think for us that have a diagnosis without ever asking for it, we try to do everything possible to not let it be known, except to those we've chosen to entrust with the information. Sheesh.

In regard to the notion that it's not a competition, prior to the trauma, there are a lot of variables that determine if a person is more or less vulnerable. And it's not just the trauma itself, its the degree we do or don't get support afterward that determines to 'what extent' we get PTSD. There's too many factors to even list, let alone fully understand.

I wonder if some of this is related to what seems to me like publicity stunts pulled by celebrities: so and so is in rehab, which makes the news. I wonder how much of that is real. But that's another thread.

 

[mytai]

@WillyKat, it baffles me as well. Not that PTSD is anything to be embarrassed about, but I know personally I struggle with embarrassment over it - I can't even talk to my family about it. I'm sure my parents know I have it as I was a minor when I was initially diagnosed with it for the first time, but aside from them, not a soul in my family knows about any of my diagnoses.

Who knows whether it is another middle school fad - apparently the latest one is going on Twitter and tweeting terrorist threats to airlines. Completely and utterly stupid thing to do, do kids not realize the consequences of their actions anymore? If you are interested in reading about that little side bar, the first teen was from the Netherlands.

I agree with your comment that it isn't the trauma itself, it depends on so many factors whether a person will develop PTSD after a traumatic event. Not everyone who is abused or in a car accident will develop PTSD, but some will.

 

[Lionheart]

To my mind trauma is trauma and it is damaging to ones entire being.

I often say that I have been through "severe, prolonged abuse", but this is to tell the truth of the abuse I suffered and is not to say that my PTSD is any worse than other peoples.

... because as I said, trauma is trauma and abuse is abuse!!! It is all damaging to us!

... we deserve to be recognized for the struggling and suffering we endure, the hard healing work that we do, and not have our trauma minimized by people who do not understand what PTSD and trauma really are!!!

So, kudos on the rant, I totally agree with you yoshixvx!!!!

 

[Fadeaway]

I have been diagnosed by multiple professionals. However, A young man that I took under my wing as a teenager has not. He does not have any health insurance and can not afford to pay for a medical diagnosis. He is also terrified of a diagnosis coming back to haunt him. However there is not doubt in either of our minds that he has it. If any of you hear heard his story and his symptoms, I think you would all agree. True it is not an official diagnosis but knowing that he is 99% likely to have it has allowed to have enough understanding on how to cope and to work on healing. Weather it is talking to people who care or reading books on overcoming PTSD.

No one can say what would cause another person to have PTSD. Some people have more of a predisposition to developing it through genetics and other factors, so while one person may have had to experience a serious trauma to develop it, another may only need to experience a minor trauma or a series of minor traumas.

 

[FindingMyself88]

I sincerely agree that people who fake PTSD invalidate those of us who truly suffer from it. I have a friend who says her psych just diagnosed her with PTSD from being picked on as a kid. Not bullied, picked on. Plus she really shows no symptoms of it and trust me, if she did, I would know! She tells me things I don't want to know sometimes. It makes me look at her and think "does she really have PTSD and I just have it REALLY bad?" I am only 25 and have been emotionally disabled by mine alongside with some somatic issues.

I think @mytai brings up a good point too. I, like some of you have said, struggled with accepting the diagnosis of PTSD. My original T said before diagnosed that I had faced some pretty big developmental traumas as a child. I thought nothing of that. Then my PCP touched on PTSD, but I asked to be referred to a psychiatrist. The psych withheld the diagnosis for about 3 meetings before finally diagnosing me with PTSD and MDD. I still didn't accept it until my T said she believed this as well. In September 2013 I was also diagnosed by my psych with Anxiety Disorder NOS. I did not believe this diagnosis until my T helped me to see it. A good bit of my anxiety is not trauma related.

Despite having my diagnosis(s) confirmed multiple times, I still do not like to tell people I have PTSD. I will admit to anxiety and depression, but I am not open with just anyone about my PTSD, so I don't understand it when people want to almost "flaunt it". The few times I have said something to someone not close to me, I have gotten the response of "you weren't in the army or a natural disaster." This infuriates me beyond belief!