Afraid To Find My Voice.

[Laura 2]

@FindingMyself88 What's the worst she might say or do? Refuse to speak with you about it? If so, then you have your answer as to who she really is. I think I might be indignant in that situation!

If she's agrees to speak with you but is distant in a politely Christian way...well, it's the cleaned-up version of #1really. Either way, you've gained valuable yet intensely painful information about her and not trusting her again. You can get over that. As it is, you're feeling she's not there for you.

An idea - why don't you write a letter to her asking her if all's well with her, if there's anything you can help with etc. Also saying what really happened (the rape) and say that you'd like to talk with her about it and your suicide attempt, that you were so very grateful that she and her husband were there for you. And you're sad that there seems to be a distance between you nowadays.

That way she has time to think about how she might want to respond. Who knows? You may well find that there's nothing wrong and she's just been soooo busy...

How wonderful you have a doggie...;-) They are such good company and I'm so glad Bris has been there for you.

 

[FindingMyself88]

@Laura 2 Sorry it took me a couple of days to reply, I was on the road all day Tuesday aside from therapy then yesterday was a bad day for me.

It just so happens that Mama G found out I was leaving tomorrow (the apartment finally cleared us to have Bristol!) and so she texted to ask if I wanted to meet for breakfast. I said yes, now we shall see if I have the courage to tell her how I feel. I do love her SOOO much and she has been there for me through so much junk. I will try to post here tomorrow night and let everyone know how it goes.

Thank you :) yes, she is wonderful! People tried telling me I couldn't train my own service dog, but within 3 weeks she is going to stores with me and even went to Burger King tonight! She alerted me today at wal-mart and grounded me when I was starting to get anxious.

 

[Laura 2]

so she texted to ask if I wanted to meet for breakfast.

That's excellent news :tup: I'm sure it'll be fine if you gently broach the subject.

Great to hear about how you're training Bristol too [we need a doggie smiley here!!]