Working Through Flashbacks Because Of A Seperation.

[jc3]

I am currently going through a break up from a relationship that lasted from October last year until the end of March. This woman was and still is incredibly special to me but sadly it's not meant to be. Long story short, we both have traumatic pasts that interfered with the relationship. I have an intense longing for her companionship right now. We just spoke via text message an hour ago for the first time in a week which sent me into a very intense flashback. I kept crying for 15 minutes. I am aware now that loss of an intimate partner triggers me into feelings of abandonment from my youth. It's still very excruciating. It makes me feel all alone with no one to help. That's why I am here posting this so perhaps I could learn from any one of you who have also been through a seperation while having CPTSD.

 

[Powder]

Welcome to the forum, and I'm sorry you lost this special relationship.

I hope that you will either be able to reconnect with her or find someone even more able to connect in a new way.

 

[Deleted member 33052]

I'm so sorry for your pain, jc. It seems that PTSD is devastating on relationships.

Have you had a chance to look through the forums? There's a wealth of information available to you here. While your post suggests a foregone conclusion, I wish you peace of mind and the best possible outcome. PTSD is hard enough without the relationship issues.

We're here, if you need to vent. Or scream. Or cry. :hug: if you accept.

 

[jc3]

WelI stillome to the forum, and I'm sorry you lost this special relationship.

I hope that you will either be abl...

Thank you for the kind reply. We (my ex) and i still talk on occasion. She dropped off the rest of my stuff last Saturday which brought me to my knees in tears. I was so afraid. I was afraid that I hurt her but she reassured me that the relationship ended because I'm not well enough to be with someone, which I agree with. I'm having a flashback right now but I have hope that I'll be okay, AND I have new tools to help me through the pain.

 

[jc3]

I'm so sorry for your pain, jc. It seems that PTSD is devastating on relationships.

Have you had a...

Thank you for the kind words. I have begun to find peace of mind with the belief that no matter how painful my flashbacks are, they WILL pass. I have to remind myself that I am not in danger and that I have new skills in my adult body that I did not have as a child. I have assure the little boy within that his pain is okay with me and that I won't allow him to harm himself.

 

[Powder]

Surround yourself with lots of positive support, more than you think you need.

I can't imagine going through flashbacks and a separation like this. I'm sorry to hear this is still an issue. I hope you have a good therapist or someone to talk to.

 

[jc3]

Surround yourself with lots of positive support, more than you think you need.

I can't imagine going throu...

It's okay. I appreciate your concern. I am getting better at taking care of myself alone when I'm afraid. I know a lot of people who can be supportive but I don't feel safe trying to connect with most of them. My circle is very small. The isolation can be painful. I am about to undergo traumatic incident reduction therapy soon with a colleague of my current therapist.