Deep core beliefs

I have recently started EMDR therapy and I've been processing a lot, which feels like an understatement as I type this. ha! A lot of crazy stuff has been coming up, but I return to the core beliefs of "I am unworthy" and "I am broken." I know these were embedded in me within my childhood, teenage years, and young adulthood, but I just want my mind and body to align that I do have inherent value and I do matter. It feels like my emotions and bodily responses are trying to catch up on something I already logically know. It is frustrating.

Have you tried exploring parts? It could be that a part of you doesn't trust or can't relate to the adult you that knows you are worthy. And working on what that part needs might help.

It is very frustrating when things aren't aligned inside. Draining too.

Movingforward10 said:

Have you tried exploring parts? It could be that a part of you doesn't trust or can't relate to the adult you that knows you are worthy. And working on what that part needs might help.

It is very frustrating when things aren't aligned inside. Draining too.

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Hi Movingforward,
I have not done parts work, but I have read about Internal Family systems. I would have to see if my therapist is able to do that - thank you.

I had therapy regarding internal family systems theory. Very helpful.

If it helps, I definitely think you're worthy of getting because you're trying! I would never wanna be near a therapist myself but it's great it works for some. I think the majority of people matter and deserve a better life.

If anyone is actually broken it's me since I don't really "take care" of myself according to some people (in more ways than I imagined) and that makes me just want to give up cause I'm not even getting praised for trying. I also restrict calories and carbs to the point I'm mentally and physically unwell but unfortunately I'm still alive and never even fainted. I'm sure I must have organ damage or something but surprisingly I'm still functioning... as long as no one takes away my addictions.

It sure feels like my life in particular has almost no value so I'm unworthy of a lot of things since no one's told me otherwise. I don't believe I have a chance at healing anymore. It's like I died ages ago, literally cannot remember the last time I felt true happiness for more than 5 seconds. It's no way to live.

Hope this shows it can get much worse so don't give up if you still have a chance cause things can get so much worse and it leads to more unnecessary pain.

Not sure if it is helpful to you but I have a son who, when he was young, was as innocent as the pure driven snow. I took the language I was using on myself and conjured up an image of him and tried to say those words to him. Stopped me dead in my tracks. Then I converted those twisted and non supportive words for supportive words. Has changed my whole inner experience