A Mild Reaction to Bilateral Music and Memory Recall

[chihayafuru]

tried writing about things i remember instead of the nightmare that i had last night, whilst listening to bilateral music for as long as it took to write and then just listening and reading what i wrote and then just listening for 15 minutes. i felt abit anxious and a bit sick around certain parts of the memory but it only lasted like 10 minutes and then i've felt fine since.
other people seem to have worse reactions and i don't get why cause my reaction seemed pretty mild compared to some people.
also after writing down the thing, when you do it again would you write it again or just read it?

 

[arfie]

every healing journey is unique. in my own herstory, comparing myself to others is a form of deflection which keeps me so busy watching other people that i can continue on in the same old denial and repression. resisting my lifelong habit of comparing myself to others helps me stay focused on my own journey. healing is neither a race nor a dance competition.

not only is every healing journey unique, but each of phase of each healing journey is equally unique. i trust my healing instincts to guide me. it's okay if there are no celestial bells and whistles chiming to tell me i ran the course correctly.

 

[chihayafuru]

it's okay if there are no celestial bells and whistles chiming to tell me i ran the course correctly.

that would be useful though.
randomly felt sick again just as i was about to get my cake but i tried ignoring it and i got my cake and ate it, it was yummy.

 

[chihayafuru]

I get the feeling not much will happen but i'm going to continue trying it. i'll do it again on wednesday

 

[arfie]

yes, some sort of sign would be extremely useful but don't underestimate the amount of healing which happens while we're busy looking for bells and whistles.

for what it's worth
after half a century of recovery work, i still don't emote like a drama star. engineers seldom do and i figure that's just nature. the important part is to confront and process my emotions rather than hiding behind analytical logic. even in the full grips of grief, my tears are few and quiet.

 

[chihayafuru]

I haven't felt anxious today. I did feel sick and faint and then tiredbut that was cause of period pain