A Thread Of Good Memories

[anni]

Oh I SAW that pic-the bees, the daisy, the harmonica- everything! I seriously keep finding those flowers when opening books I've had for quite awhile-must have pressed them in there years ago. I just leave them there to maybe find again next time. We're SO lucky! I know my daughter in law thinks I'm just saying things for the sake of being nice, but am not because I'm ALWAYS telling her these stories-how my son brought me things I still have. The coffee mug I use most in the morning he brought me 15 years ago. My parents took him on vacation to get away from the craziness the baby and I were in. This little kid didn't want to leave his mom in that scary condition-we made him go of course. Well he 'bought' me that mug when they came home. Still kills me. I went for a very, very long time not being able to think of those days, and my boys in them because of the guilt. They shouldn't have been there and were because of ME, you know? I came across a picture in the attic 2 days ago of them from then-like getting punched. But- they are ok. I'm thinking about these things only NOW-and oh my it's nice, if painful.The guilt still awful awful awful-but T helps. Did not do any of the things which got me there on purpose-getting there in my head slowly so meanwhile making sure these memories keep coming back! Funny the threads one doesn't know will be genuinely helpful, and make you stop being so dam contained and controlled all the time. That's all very good and well to get through the day but it disallows some actual FEELING. I'm extremely, honestly grateful to hear of the fishing brothers and frogs, the Easter someone wrote of, the flowers-all of it.Feels selfish of me-or rather in self-interest to wish things to continue. :) Awful, isn't it?

 

[Iam]

Not awful at all Anni. It is helping me too ;o) I understand the guilt....When I think of what I put my boys thru it breaks my heart. I know some of their struggles today are because of my instability when they are growing up. In fact that is what is on my T's agenda for today's session. UGGGH! That being said....somehow my boys have turned out to be loving, honest and hardworking. They are all outgoing and people naturally take to them. So I did something right ;o) I bet you can look at your kids and say the same thing ;o)

The Fall Activity thread made me remember one of my most awe inspiring moments. I used to babysit so I could stay home when my boys were little. I had taken all the kiddies to the park. This park is filled with giant oak trees. It was the middle of the week so no-one else was around. A crisp fall morning, sun streaking thru the trees, red and yellow leaves littering the ground. The kids and I were making piles of leaves for them to jump in. They were running around, giggling and laughing. You know, those in those high little voices. So happy and full of life! Squirrels running around gathering acorns for winter. Then all of a sudden everything went silent, I mean totally hushed. The kids stopped laughing and running. We were all just looking around and all of a sudden the leaves, thousands of them, started floating to the ground. Acres of oak forest, not a sound, just the red, yellow and orange leaves falling like snowflakes. No camera could have captured that incredibly magical scene. It was one of the most peaceful, etherial moments of my life.....

 

[anni]

Fall and winter are my favorite, favorite times-the leaves! Oh who doesn't have to clean up endless trails of bits of leaves and twigs after they've all been buried under them- even the dog? Maybe the clear air and the cold have something to do with all of it-tose memories are even clearer than some, it seems. The flowers and meadows of summer are such lovely backdrops for summer-the lakes and beaches but the fall/winter scenes tug at my heart so much! I'd have to bet it you print these out for your children, you know, they'll be dog earred, tattered and treasured heirlooms for your children as adults. Seriously lovely things for them to read to know you by-what's prescious to you about them, what matters most. I like that thought, you know?

I've been very lucky with the children. They are 4 for 4 with anxiety disorders, but the 3 older ones who are out of school now all are just nice people, 2 are out of college and one from grad school, one married with my grandchild. :) My daughter was born with a chronic illness, probably from me being tossed around while pregnant but she's tough-turned herself into one of those uber-athletes, over-acheievrs I guess to compensate. Yes, they really are just fine and am so, SO fortunate-maybe the parenting became a little too OVER parenting as a result of the dreck but that didn't seem to harm them, either! :) Resilient little people, aren't they, in the end?

My Dad is not at all well at the moment-'just' one more thing among several stirring up the rats in my particular attic at the moment. I am actually going to make a point of reminding him of some of the memories this thread has brought up-some I haven't written. He took us EVERYWHERE, not where it cost a ton of money, just took us OUT. Hiking, looking for fossils, in the canoe, scooping up salamanders, finding the most hair-raising hills to tobaggan in the winter-just all the time, everywhere. He'd like that very much, the good he's done here.

 

[Iam]

Toboggan hills!!!! I live on one heehee! You are making me long for winter snow and it isn't even officially Fall yet!

Seriously though, I am sorry about your father being ill. That must be hard, but like you said, to sit and share memories with him will be such a wonderful gift. Bitter sweet to be sure, but wow! I need to do that with my dad. Haven't seen him in almost 2 years now. Need to make a trip down his way.

 

[anni]

It would figure you have a tobaggan hill-ha! Dad used to have us use Mom's jelly-canning-wax ( drove her crazy) to wax the bottom of that old thing. We'd pack as many as we could on there, the person behind you with their boots in your lap, and the first person taking all the snow in the face. Hee! That would be the LITTLE sister, since if she said no we'd just put her there. SO much work for such a short time to scream your head off-then back up that hill which looked soooo far from the bottom. Little sister stcuk pulling the tobaggan, too, unless Dad noticed and said 'Um,, girls?' . Yes, going to see him today. He's a terrible, awful, cranky, demandingly exhausting patient, too-the worst EVER. It does give me something to do when there, though, since we tease each other terribly and I'll tell him things like he's just like the crabby old people he used to complain about-he'll tell me I'm out of the will ( most days )-I'll ask him where the hell his pleasant pill is, would he like one-he'll hold his chest like I just killed him and start talking about how sharper than a serpant's tooth is a thankless child. He'll beat me at chess and be insufferable about it for the rest of the day, then wonder why noone will play with him anymore. And God I'm going to miss him.

 

[Iam]

Your warm laughter and jibes about your dad make me smile Anni. I am so glad that you have this time with him. Yes, you will miss him, but you will have good memories and no regrets about not having spent enough time with him.

My mother in-law passed away a year ago last July, on my 50th birthday actually. She and I were so close. My hubby and I moved her up here from Calif and I never regretted a day of it and am so happy we had that last 1 1/2 years together. Funny....my son and I were just facebooking yesterday about how much we miss her and my hubby and I had just been laughing over some of her antics. Good memories that I am so glad that I have!

So back to the toboggans! You were such a snot of a big sister haha!!! I could just see your poor little sis getting her face slapped with fresh snow and truddging up the hill pulling that heavy tobbogan! And I can HEAR your dad saying "ummmm...girls"! You KNEW exactly what that meant didn't you! HAHA!

My husband is sitting in his chair asking me what I am grinning about! LOL! Now he wants me to share my good memories with him ;o)

I still have my old tobaggan. It is light wood with red painted trim. My dad and the boys repaired it for my kids when they were little. I have even photos of them working on it together! I remember one time when my mom's parents went with us. Oh and the hot chocolate out of the thermos was such a treat! Anyway, there were several trails, the main one led down to a creek you'd cross then back up the otherside to where you'd park your cars. So my dad warned me to make sure that I stopped and didn't turn onto that trail or I'd end up in the creek. Well guess what happened??? It really was an accident, I didn't want to get wet, let alone into trouble! Oh man, I kept picking up speed going down that long hill. There was a group of teenagers or maybe early 20's standing in front of the creek. They simply parted and SPLASH in I went LOL!

When we first moved back up here to Oregon our youngest son was in 8th grade. It was 80 degrees when we moved in on March 1st. 2 weeks later it was snowing! Our youngest son and his god brother took out my old tobbogan. This was before I had the pasture fencing up. It is quite a steep long hill to the bottom pasture. My son put his god brother in front (who is 7 weeks OLDER by the way, but that is always how these two have been). Haha ...the scotchbroom was hitting Scotty in the face, at the end Scotty stood up and there was snow completely packed behind his glasses. Those two boys (now men) have always made us laugh, quite the pair they are!

My old tobbaggan is now retired. Too fragile for the granddaughters. Put it out as winter decoration near the front door every year and sift thru the memories every time I see it ;o)

 

[TLight]

Picking mushrooms and blackberries with my honey!

My wedding and honeymoon were good memories!

 

[Sammy]

Toboggans, now there are some memories!! I was the little sister who had to tow it up the hill for my much older siblings! I clearly remember the demise of the toboggan. It had 3 of us on it, my brother who is 9 years older than me was "driving." Before heading down the hill, he says to my younger brother and me, "if I say bail out, get off!" I swear he aimed it at the tree just to see what would happen. Or he was trying to kill us, I am not sure which. At the last second he shouted "JUMP!" We all rolled to the side (we had to trust him -we couldn't see ahead!) and ended up inches from the tree. Scared the daylights out of us until we realized we had survived and then it was great! The toboggan was in pieces though.

I remember being about 3 and being towed on the toboggan by my siblings. The snow was so deep to my little body, when I got off, the snow was up to my waist and I couldn't move. They, of course, thought it was hysterical. I was terrified while they threatened to leave me. Lots of fun to teenagers... Not so fun for a toddler.

Yes, I was terrorized by my siblings but I still LOVE a lot of snow!

We live at the end of a cull de sac with conservation land on 2 side... Lots of frogs and critters. I would absolutely love to live in the middle of no where, have a little bit of property, some horses and dogs and only the sounds of nature to listen to. Cannot be in cities for too long - too noisy! Well, the wrong kind of noise.

 

[anni]

Hee! I'm not the only snot of a big sister-yes I was AWFUL, Iams! My sister doesn't feel that way but we still roll around with laughter at her expense, isn't it terrible? She was this little, skinny thing with big glasses and knobby knees, quite, quite hyper active and just a big pain in the *SS. I do not know why my parents allowed us to pick on her like we did-no fear, she GOT us back always but boy, we were dreadful! In Maine at the cabin, my older sister and I ( NO idea why except we could), most morning, too-would go haul her out of the bottom bunk ( of course she got the bottom bunk) from a sound sleep, take her to the dock and pitch her screaming little backside into the lake. I'm sure this comes up on a regular basis with HER therapist, if she has one! We're close and always have been so NO idea what was going on in our sister heads, or why on earth Mom and Dad allowed this!! It might have had something to do with her Dennis-The Menis persona when awake, and possibly when she was asleep was the only time we had an even playing field.

Blackberries and honey sounds like it should be a poem from midsummer, doesn't it?

I'll bet that brother aimed the tobaggan-and the siblings were like ''Ok, you just go ahead and bean all of us, it's ok!". Siblings are dreadful and I know because i was one! :) These toboggan memories I only just did remember because of this thread, and saw everyone's stories in my head SO clearly! I adore snow, too, and resent summer just because it can't snow.

Yes Iams, Dad and I did pick on each other yesterday some more and I'm out of the will again for telling him I'm glad I look like the milkman, and not him.

 

[Iam]

Milkman Hehe

Milkman Annie hahahaha! :rofl:

I was the little sister taking all the "Fun" pranks ;o) My brother and I are quite close. Funny....I feel most loved with other's in my circle when they are making fun of me.....guess it goes back to the sibling thing LOL!

I remember one winter when I was pregnant with our 3rd son. I had taken the kids tobogganing in the field across from our house. The hill was steep and had no trees. There was however a telephone pole. I instructed my oldest son, 4 yrs old at the time, to steer clear of it. Did he???? You got it! The dang kid steered right for it.....I was frozen with fear and too far away to do anything about it anyway. I screamed "JUMP" just before the sled hit. Thank god he did.....AIYYYEEE! It's a wonder I didn't miscarry from the pure terror of it all. It wasn't until a few years ago that my son remembers it all, the little fart did the whole thing on purpose! GAH..... my youngest sibling got the pranks pulled on him even while still in the womb! Heehee!

 

[anni]

My Gabby did the same thing!!! HUGE hill, one tree, went straight for it, then bailed out as I had a heart attack, stoke and swallowed a lung. Little RAT.She has Crohn's, was born with it so is as big as a hamster and allll through life set herself out to be as interpid as humanly possible. When she was FIVE, I was upstairs at my parents house, happened to look out of the window and she's waving at me from eye level, having climbed their dam tree by the porch. Another time, I walked into my living room to find her teenage brothers playing football with her. That's bad enough in the house but SHE was the 'football', dammit! I yelled 'Put the baby DOWN!!!' and she's shrieking 'It's ok Mommy, this is FUN' while flying through the air. Oh God. I have to tell you it was right when things had just passed a crisis/stalking point and Good Grief the walking mess I was at that point.

I think children are here to get you back for everything you put your parents ( and siblings ) through!

 

[metis-siren]

I remember being in Dublin, Ireland for my 18th birthday with the love of my life, walking through Trinity college on our way to a very nice dinner and realizing I was in no way prepared to walk over cobblestone in tiny little heels. I remember how green the grass was, how pretty I felt in my dress, how loved I felt. I remember dessert that night - a cheesecake with Bailey's syrup and cream sauce on the other side, both in swirls. I remember how grown up I felt sitting there with my fiancé in a foreign country, how comfortable I was. I remember being so absolutely in love that I knew I would never forget that day, the walk back to his place through Trinity, almost falling over - laughing and feeling normal. I remember romance and love.