Accountability Friends! :)

[Definitely..maybe]

Today I had a colonoscopy and endoscopy to finally figure out what's wrong with my body- again. But, healthy mind, healthy body, healthy soul, right? Maybe!

I've been bad at posting on here, so tired from my college classes and massage school! But I'm going to be better at posting on here and work more on healing myself. I've been too tired for healing lately, but ill do better!

 

[EvenStrongerNow]

OK. I made 3 calls and sent 2 emails to Ts. I received one call back so far and spoke with her about her approach and experience. I wrote everything down and I'm going to wait until I speak to others before going in for consultations. The one I spoke to charges for an initial consultation. I don't know if that's normal?

 

[EvenStrongerNow]

I got almost all of the dishes done and received two more calls from two more Ts.

 

[Leah123]

I lost about half my coworkers this week, and I had to pick who would leave. I've been so busy with that horrible transition I've hardly had time to be accountable about anything, though I did have my therapy appointment, glad I did that, and am keeping up well enough with homework and family stuff.

So, today, well... I guess I will try and read one chapter of my DBT book, that shouldn't take too long, and I will listen while I work to a really nice visualization exercise for PTSD that my therapist recommended. I really want some sleep and a day off, but... I'll just have to do the best I can right now.

 

[Britt.f7]

I'm holding myself accountable for so much sleep that I had over the last day. I took Seroquel and that makes me sleep. I shouldn't have slept as long as I did. I shouldn't have taken the seroquel in the dose that I did. I'm holding myself to not doing this. I need to be awake for family.

 

[EvenStrongerNow]

I don't want to be accountable again today, but I will. I have received 2-3 voicemails on my phone regarding Ts who have returned my call. I don't want to call them back, but I am going to. I am also going to apply for jobs today because I didn't do that at all yesterday. Also, I'm going to get laundry done. I also need to eat. I'm going to get a bowl of cereal right now because I woke up at 1pm today.

 

[untiltoday]

So here I am. Another week and I spent 4+ days without leaving my house.

I've spent the past two days beating myself up over it, until I came here and saw my last post on this thread: about how I think I'm taking it easy, but I'm really really not.

I swear: if I could just stop arguing with myself and remember things I need to really be doing (even "bad, lazy" things like resting my mind and body from 25+ years of constant stress)...my life would be a lot easier. *sigh*

 

[untiltoday]

Finally doing some chores I've put off again.

Went to therapy today and had a good talk...but it looks like Wednesday she will ask this question and try again to talk about it: "I'd like to ask, if there's nothing more pressing to talk about today...why you think you may be dissociative?"

I'm both interested in this (and whatshe means with the question, because I've had horrible therapists before...this is a psychologist), but I'm also wondering if anyone can tell me if they know this question?