Advice From Mothers

[Heather]

@Casey_03 I feel for what you are going through. I raised my daughter ALL BY MYSELF. I literally had to do everything on my own. When I gave birth, they did take the baby to the nursery. So, I could get some much needed sleep.

Although, once I was home. It was all me. I think my mother took her one night, so I could get some rest and that's only because the pediatrician told her too. I was exhausted.

She slept with me for the first four months in my bed. Up about every two hours. I found t.v. shows to watch that I hadn't seen in years. Amazing what's on at 3 o'clock in the morning. It was hard. I won't lie. But you'll get used to it. I did.

I agree with the others, try to give breast-feeding your best shot. Healthiest for the baby. Although, they don't tell you how much your nipples will ache/throb until they (your nipples) get used to your baby feeding on them.

I think once you get the hang of it, you'll do fine.

Good Luck

 

[Casey_03]

please consider contacting UNICEF rather than an institution

I'm sorry, I'm confused. Why are you recommending a foster care agency? I'm not trying to give the baby up.

 

[Recovery4Me]

The site said it was to assist Mothers and their children and that the contact was to do so. I read through it and was excited that they might help you! I did not see the fostercare agency part and apologize.:notworthy: I will go back and recheck it.:( It looked promising for assisting Moms. Sorry, sincerely @Casey_03 I blew it.

However, maybe if you lost your job, you could BE a fostercare Mom? It is a paying job in the USA.

 

[Casey_03]

I'm sure you've been thinking about this some, any kind of a plan?

Yes, I've been speaking with friends about this a lot and basically trying to have a contingency plan in case I do get fired. The consensus seems to be that I could then crowd fund and raise enough donations to be able to relocate (if I do get fired, the circumstances are such that the company would be liable for a massive lawsuit - i have already documented their discrimination, threats, and various violations of labor laws .... my plan would be to go public with all of this if they did fire me, and then try to raise donations through crowd funding). It's a newspaper that is funded by the U.S. State Dept, NATO and various other Western organizations ... so their mistreatment of me would absolutely get a lot of attention. I'm not usually one for taking charity, but many of my colleagues have pointed out that I did work in a war zone for this country, for next to no money, so people would likely be more willing to help if shit really hits the fan. At this point, that's really the only contingency plan I have. But I'm also trying to do extra freelance work now to have enough money saved to relocate.

 

[Casey_03]

@Recovery4Me No worries at all, I was just confused. I just went to the Hope and Homes website and it said it provided foster care services ... so I wondered if I had implied I wanted to give the baby up .... Maybe they do offer other services, I will take a look! Thank you for the recommendation either way ))

 

[Recovery4Me]

Thank you for giving me the benefit of the doubt. I will recheck the site.:( I do flub sometimes.;)



Edit: http://www.unicef.org/whatwedo/

http://www.unicef.org/infobycountry/ukraine_contact.html

Hope this helps (((hugs))) if only that someone is trying to assist.

 

[ghotiff]

I was thinking that a domestic violence shelter might be willing to help you. Their focus seems to be women and children and I think they would help someone who is not suffering violence. In my area for example, they provide children with clothes, toys etc.

 

[Aarow]

Dear Casey,,,the BEST of all things to you and your new baby when she or he arrives!! I don't know how far along you are. Sounds like you have at least a few weeks?

Do as much for baby as you can, right now. Have one weeks worth of clothing, diapers, supplies. You have a list of supplies you'll need? Wash and organize the clothiing and everything else. Familiarize yourself with it all. Even if you don't plan to use cloth diapers get a stack--awesome for spit-up and other accidents. If male, throw one over his front while diapering or he will shoot you in the eye, newborns have uncanny aim. The washing is important of all clothes, chemicals in clothes = allergies = that sucks. Use Dreft or Ivory or gentle non chems stuff. Buy some used baby clothing if possible, softer, cheaper, lasts about 21/2 weeks til the next size.

You might not have any care coming to you, but are sure that baby does not? Does birth equal citizenry?

Take walks and end up in a park with mother's and children. Tell them of your worries. They are Mothers, and you might find a gold mine of information, support, Grandmothers, babysitters, at least someone to touch your belly, maybe get hug, meal, hand-me-downs. Tell them their children are beautiful and when you are due. (Even if they all look like miniature Godzillas to you and are chewing each other's knee caps off. the kids, unusual in Mothers.) If all else fails, cry. Hard. Think hormones, they are still upcycling theirs. If that park turns up nary a casserole, hug, or Grandmother, rinse and repeat.

Congrats, you're going to do fine!! Take your camera to the hospital!! Phone...whatever...take pics!! Millions!!

 

[Aarow]

ps, Casey, do you have a stroller yet? Very important piece of equipment.

I am really digging here, getting old. But if you are planning on breast feeding, believe the La Leche'? League is a world wide organization. Nursing, surprisingly, can be a bit of a trick at first, and they will support and teach you. I would not leave the hospital until you have had someone show you how to nurse your baby correctly, making SURE they are latching on. (Some kids will get their lips hooked over their gums, take on air, not get enough of mom in their mouth.) There are a few posistions possible to hold baby. Good burping will save you tons of crying...And if available the LLL would teach you all of that, I think!!

 

[Deleted member 12723]

If you do decide to nurse your baby get some glycerin for your nipples to help them to heal.

I had one child in the hospital and he was in a drawer next to my bed and when I was sleeping I could close the drawer and the nurses would take care of him. My other daughter was born at home and they put her in a isolation because of the germs from my home and then they transferred her to the drawer.

You are going to be a great mom. Everyone here has made such wonderful and helpful suggestions. I would stress sleep with the baby. I lost sleep jumping out of bed to check to see if my babies were breathing. Paranoid yes.

I do hope that you get to keep your job. I wish you the very best with an easy birth as well. Keep on making your plans beforehand and you will be just fine.

 

[Atomic]

I can't really add more to what's already been said. Stock up food for yourself, even if it's tinned. Get out of the house and walk your baby if it's safe to do so. Rocking around in the stroller will probably put your baby to sleep. My first two were easy-as, they both slept thru the night at 6 weeks. The 3rd was a different story but eventually got it sorted.

My eldest girl's best friend just had a baby and she went over to visit. My girl is very career focussed and not interested in babies or anything atm. Anyway the baby was crying and my daughter asked her friend - 'what's wrong, why is the baby crying?' - the two of them were peering into the crib and the mother says 'I have no clue'.

And that's pretty much how it goes. You'll work it out as you go.