Angry Confused Hurt

[Desiresdestiny]

It's okay Srain!

 

[Deleted member 12723]

It was not your fault. Your pastor was being a religous jerk spouting ignorance and toxic beliefs. Get as far away from him as you can. You cannot get over it. I hope you will eventually experience healing of the horror and terror memories of this abuse.

Your pastor spiritually abused you causing secondary wounding. Not your fault for trusting him either. You went to a person who was supposed to be safe and he was toxic. I am so sorry this happened to you.

I hope it does not happen to you again. Unsafe people are the worst. You have done nothing wrong. You are innocent. No need to feel gulit at all.

Do not be hard on yourself for trusting this guy. It was not your fault. You did not know he was going to do that to you. This kind of stuff makes me so angry. This guy was supposed to be safe. He was so toxic.

And he dumped quite a load on you. You are not imagining this at all. I offer you big cyber hugs. Stay away from anyone who does that to you. They do not have your wellbeing in mind. They are more interested in controlling you. It is bad control. Please take gentle care of yourself.

 

[nimkekaa]

I'm sorry that the person you turned to for help only made things worse.

I have just recently been very hard on myself for things that happened to me when I was eight. So I pulled up a picture of myself at eight and thought of other kids I know that are eight and it really helped me. To see the innocent little faces helped me see that I wasn't at fault.

It's funny how we hold ourselves up to such high standards but I bet if someone told you that they were forced to have oral sex for 4 years you would not see it as their fault.

I hope you find help with managing your triggers.