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Answers To Frequently Asked Questions (Humor)

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ghost

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Answers to Frequently Asked Questions


Q. Are you getting help?

A. I considered getting help for a long time. I weighed up the pros and cons - performed a cost/benefit analysis. In the end I decided that getting drunk was a better option.


Q. Have you tried medication?

A. Not since my laxative addiction in the late nineties.


Q. Have you thought about suicide?

A. No. Do you think I should?


Q. Do you have a plan of how you would kill yourself?

A. I have this vague notion of a piano falling on my head.


Q. Do you have support?

A. I'm sporting a pair of Bonds cotton Y-fronts; they're a tad worn, but they're doing the job.
 
Q: Why don't you just deal with it and move on?
A: Omg, thank you! That never occurred to me before! I just have to get over it!
 
Do you mind sitting in the waiting room?
No...just gotta get in sink with everyone elses's twitching....
 
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