Anxious:tomorrow

[trying2movefwd]

I am very anxious, pretty scared. Tomorrow I meet with a caseworker. My PTSD, Major Depression, have hit me hard. It's hard for me to function, focus, remember, stay grounded...I am educated! I have a Bachelors in psychology. I should (i know, i know should statements....i don't care!) have her job, be the one helping others....stupid x!!!!! Why!!!????!!!! You triggered this PTSD and added years to my already abusive childhood! .....anyway I am meeting a case worker to discuss employment opportunities and services provided for individuals who are "disabled "...my psychiatrist told me not to be surprised if they decide I am not competent to work right now! The hospital I just got out of sent a different caseworker (for a different issue ) a medical statement of what I am capable of doing. This case worker told me enough that...I am afraid of what the hospital doctor sent about me....Obviously I am a mess.

 

[trying2movefwd]

No wonder my old counselor never answered my "Am I that Bad?" Question in reference to my mental health functioning. :cry:

 

[Ka-9]

I've tried to re-train 3 times....and failed miserably each time, so I've learned to step back a bit- and give myself permission to acknowledge all the things you just said.... I can't focus, concentrate, retain or remember much, never mind other issues, so I re-focused my attentions to simply enjoying or participating in things I can do- like ride horse, climb, whatever- to try and start from scratch, and let the career worries take a back seat for now.

In fact in doing a lot of riding with my horse- it kind of swung me into thoughts of farrier work, and I've been apprenticing 2 days a week with a great dude who gets my situation, just taking it slowly. By riding the wave and going with the simple stuff- it helped me release a bit of career panic.... not that it was that easy mind you.

Not sure if that is of any comfort or use, but here's hoping.

 

[TinkerG]

@trying2movefwd

This is what I do when I feel overwhelmed with the loss of my previous self...

Take a deep breath, exhale, then say to yourself:

"this isn't necessarily my tomorrow, this may be my today, things may not go my way today or tomorrow - but they will get better, I will get better as long as remember not to hurry or rush but to slow down and take one day at a time, or one minute at a time, if necessary. My tomorrow has a chance of being something wonderful if I allow it to and work on getting better. I am grateful for every step forward."

And that allows me to accept my situation now and not give up hope for tomorrow.

I hope things go well for you tomorrow!

 

[Friday]

I would suggest you print out and bring your posts of the past several days with you, if you have problems remembering (or kick into pseudo-high-functioning under pressure), for how things are right now... As well as maybe a collection of posts that already outline things you want to talk about, but may not be able to, or able to remember. :)

 

[SpiritFree]

@Ka-9 -

Same here, glad to see I'm not alone. I too can't focus, concentrate or remember even conversations that happen a few minutes ago. Right now I'm at a job where I have to take messages, and I am having a bad episode. Especially if I have to give that message to my supervisor like yesterday. When I tried my best to relay a message to her it was a failure and I could tell on her face her anger. I'm not sure how long I will keep being a clerk there, but I am feeling desperate. I do have some test coming up soon for an EEG to see what is wrong with me. I am glad you found a way in dealing with your issue. I wish you the very best.

 

[trying2movefwd]

*wonders when she posted this*