Are The Majority Of Therapists Crazy?

[Mewen]

Therapists who can't handle your trauma shouldn't exist. Especially not if they have "Trauma" right there on the list of conditions they're qualified to treat.

"Trauma" is a HUGE area. There are MANY therapist that cant treat my trauma, I grew up in a cult. I just so happen to have one but if i had any reason at all to think my therapist couldnt then id leave and find another.

Yes, therapists should know and refer you to another but we are talking "bad" therapists, right? "Crazy" therapists? If the therapist is "bad" and "crazy" they likely wont. So what do you do? Stay with a "bad" and "crazy" therapist and be mad at them or go find another?

You are trying to justify that all therapists are "bad" and "crazy" and that is not the case. Im sorry that all you had were "bad" therapists, i really am, but if you could pay for one therapist, you should be able to end that therapy and find another. I cant think of one instance that if you could pay for one why you couldnt leave and spend that same money to pay for another.

Also, in my experience here in the US; free counselors dont see to be good. Just my expwrience. So to find them you do need to pay for them. Again, my experience.

 

[Bafof]

I cant think of one instance that if you could pay for one why you couldnt leave and spend that same money to pay for another.

Insurance. Small number of providers in network.

 

[Zuzat]

Trauma is such a huge and varied field, a single therapist can't possibly treat every trauma client with every type if trauma and trauma response. And for so many of us it takes a long time to really disclose our trauma much less really work on it that there's often a good relationship in place before the therapist fully knows what they're dealing with. So, if you're bringing something they've not worked with before they could just tell you and terminate - which would be honest but feel very rejecting. They could work with you but increase their own supervision and consultation, do some reading, get some additional training, or they could just try to do what they usually do and hope it helps.

I think what actually happens is someone finds themselves out of their depth before they get support, by which time the client is invested in the relationship and the therapist is struggling to hold it. Not at all ok, but I can see how problems can happen in trauma work particularly.

 

[Pikusa]

I think what actually happens is someone finds themselves out of their depth before they get support, by which time the client is invested in the relationship and the therapist is struggling to hold it. Not at all ok, but I can see how problems can happen in trauma work particularly.

That's really insightful! And I agree.
I think I did this myself, and I went to a few free therapists - for addiction because I was drinking to numb it out, and another more general one.
I disclosed too much too fast to those counsellors, I was desperate, and I did get a bit damaged by both of them. They did not understand and it was obvious they didn't. The second woman just talked on top of me all the time. It was weird.
But then I decided to see a therapist who specialises in my kind of trauma - different universe altogether. She's the one who changed my life and I am ever grateful.
I don't think the first two were crazy or bad, they were just not trained enough for me, and not at all trained in trauma.
I didn't understand they were all different, but they really are.
If you find the right one it's a godsend

 

[Pivul]

But then I decided to see a therapist who specialises in my kind of trauma - different universe altogether.

This.

Can you even imagine if we picked doctors the same way we picked therapists? :roflmao: Well. I needed heart surgery, so first I saw a pediatric foot specialist because I really liked their bio, then I saw a dermatologist because my skin gets all flushed from this heart condition, then I saw 3 nurses, and 1 CNA, because they were cheap, then... Doctors SUCK!!!! None of them can help me! They're all incompetent charlatans!

Is there a particular type of crazy that is more common among them -- narcissism, psychosis, delusions, etc?

I know we've sort of transitioned into bad therapist stories, but since the OP asked about what percentage have personality disorders? NIMH has the general population at roughly 9%. Which would mean about 1 in 10.

Link Removed

Purely mental health issues? NAMI has it at roughly 18.5% in any given year (apx 1 in 5),
NAMI: National Alliance on Mental Illness | Mental Health By the Numbers

while the CDC has it at roughly 25%. (1 in 4)
Mental Illness Surveillance Among Adults in the United States

And if we jump to lifetime? Astronomical raise that varies between 50%-80% depending on whose studies you're reading.

But that means not just 1:10 - 4:5 of therapists are suffering from mental health issues, but your kids teachers, your doctors, your mechanics, your bus drivers, and every other profession you're putting your & your loved ones lives in their hands.

Cheerful thought, what? :D

 

[Bafof]

Can you even imagine if we picked doctors the same way we picked therapists? :roflmao: Well. I needed heart surgery, so first I saw a pediatric foot specialist because I really liked their bio, then I saw a dermatologist because my skin gets all flushed from this heart condition, then I saw 3 nurses, and 1 CNA, because they were cheap, then... Doctors SUCK!!!! None of them can help me! They're all incompetent charlatans!

Mmmmm, no.

The analogy would be, "I went to five general physicians who all looked at my sprained ankle. One of them said it was a rash and I needed ointment; one said it was poor circulation and I needed to exercise; one said there was a splinter in there, and he pricked it with a needle, but didn't find one; one said I was imagining the whole thing, and I just need to stop being so fanciful; finally, one looked at it and said, 'It's a sprained ankle,' and referred me to specialist. Most general physicians don't know what the heck they're doing!"

 

[Esus]

And that happens too bafof...
So maybe all doctors are crazy and bad too

 

[Azaz]

This makes sense to me. For a couple of reasons.

People who get a good T? Tend to stick with them. Often for over...

Quite a few therapists went through bad things that made them want to become therapists. Those are the only kinds I want. The kind that I can relate to.

 

[Adebok]

So, if you're bringing something they've not worked with before they could just tell you and terminate - which would be honest but feel very rejecting.

I did have a therapist do this with me, once. And I simultaneously respected her and felt like I was, yet again, 'a problem'. She was smart enough to know that would happen, and our last session was entirely about trying to close that feeling down.

In the end, I know she did the right thing. I wonder how often this happens, vs how often ego gets in the way?

 

[Ubide]

I've had a fairly wide range of experiences with therapists--a few did seem
to fit the "crazy" bill. The therapists who are really competent and up on the
latest research about trauma are worth every penny imho.

Having experienced extreme trauma in childhood and gotten into severely
abusive relationships as an adult, I was in desperate need for help when
I first started seeking help. I've had some terrible experiences with a number
of therapists, and I've always wondered if my vulnerability was a factor.
When someone knows you're vulnerable, they tend to let their true colors shine forth.

Here's what I found for what's it's worth--therapists can be:
1. "crazy"-basically demonstrate behaviors that should put them firmly on the
couch so to speak instead of the patient/client. can be very traumatizing
2. incompetent--angry? punch a pillow! abused by your Dad? write an unsent
letter- emotionally eating? drink more water! While these suggestions can be
sound, if you do them and come back wanting more and are just given more
of the same, they've already run out of tricks in what is a fairly shallow, formulaic bag
3. indifferent--barely stifled yawns, tossed off suggestions, no memory of your
situation one week to the next, disbelief about details of your trauma, one size fits all diagnosis (everything looks like ADHD) listens to your
description of trauma stony faced. Basic lack of empathy, which can be cause trauma in an of itself.
4. elitist--responds differently to those with favored background whether from
elite university, glbt community, age range, same philosophical bent. Feels good when your'e in, but not so great when it's not a fit, but either way not healthy.
5. unprofessional --shows up late or not at all, erratic billing, blaming you for
mixed up appt times or dates, talks about themselves excessively
or other clients histories and progress. Can also be traumatic. Imagine being in crisis and waiting anxiously for appt and therapist never shows, then being
accused of making mistake and implied that maybe you're a bit crazy to be
upset. Having a business card with the appt written down in their writing helps.
6. competent and professional and empathic--my experience has been these
are fairly rare, but worth the searching process and definitely worth the expense.
For myself, trauma/abuse has been the cause of many physical problems. I
would much rather pay a good therapist than run around to a bunch of doctors
chasing symptoms.
7. machiavellian-- the scariest of all. Unfortunately not as rare as you might
think. Those who "get off" on the power differential, like to emphasize your
problems and difficulties and their competence. Can be dangerous if
you're really vulnerable. Often combines "love bombing" type behavior in
beginning with callous or indifferent behavior later to foster anxiety and
dependency. For example, I had one therapist who was great in the
beginning, but then started to ask me to start thinking of her as a sort of savior
"I'm the only person who's there for you" (not true!)and withhold therapy until I
started to praise her "being the one" for me. Discouraged steps I was taking
in personal growth (ie attending classes) When I balked she started
talking about how she might need to change my diagnosis from PTSD
to something more serious. Creepy and threatening. I pretended everything
was fine for a few sessions and then claimed unavoidable scheduling
conflicts to get the hell out. Totally traumatizing experience.

So while I haven't had the most are "crazy" experience, I've had some pretty
terrible and traumatizing experiences with therapists. Who have either slowed
or set back my recovery considerably. So it's definitely buyer beware, just like
looking for a good lawyer or real estate agent.

That said, obviously the good therapists have been tremendously beneficial
to me, so it's worth the search and expense. The best way to "shop", that I've
found is to have your history ready to tell in fairly unemotional format. And
have your goals and obstacles in mind. If you're not sure pick one and work on
it. You'll know pretty quick whether or not they can help you. Also, if you're in
crisis and just need a soft landing spot, please be cautious. It was precisely
in these situations that I ran up against the worst of therapists behaviors.
The most important quality is experience with your particular situation
(ie whether it be domestic violence, rape, etc) and empathy. Experience is
vitally necessary to help steer you in the right direction (ie leaving a domestic violence situation can be dangerous can require some planning) and empathy is the essential ingredient to provide emotional safety.

I think $100 hour is actually a very reasonable charge for a competent therapist
given all the hidden costs. Actually most of the good people I've worked with
don't even accept insurance anymore, so they can preserve their livelihoods.
Sure a so-so, incompetent, etc therapist shouldn't be making a good living, but
what about all those incompetent or unscrupulous lawyers who are living large?
Frankly, a lot of therapists are women who rely on their partner's income. Those
who are supporting their families or are on their own charge much more.
And they are often better about staying on top of the latest developments in the
field of trauma recovery, as they see the need to distinguish themselves from the
rest in the field.

 

[Usoj]

crazy before they become therapists

^^^ That! LMAO!

They all seem to have issues and that's why they're drawn to the job, apparently!

 

[Funiha]

@Bafof "weaved and bobbed through sessions avoiding the hard stuff (no matter how obvious I made it that I needed to talk about it) trying to keep it as easy as possible for no one's benefit but their own"

Right, forgot about that. The lazy. Met a few of those as well.

"Lots of people have pathetically limited options because of expense, insurance, location, etc. It's not so easy to just up and go find another one. It sucks to have to end therapy after months of searching"

Exactly!! The reason I've seen so many therapists is that I've wasted a number of months with people who either overstated their qualifications or were unwilling
unable to perform competently. Then I've had to go through the search process over again, and it can take meeting with a number of people to find a good fit.

When you're in crisis you really need the therapist to be accurate
in their stated abilities and be EMPATHETIC. This last quality seems to be
sorely lacking in a number of therapists and it seems to me to be the most
vital one. Some therapists can fake the empathy when you're all shiny
and new (and not talking about the hard stuff), but are downright callous
when you want to unpack the trauma and get down to the hard stuff. Or
their billable hours went up and are feeling flush with easier clients and want
you to keep it mellow or leave.

Because lets face it. It's easier to talk about someone's grief about their
nice old granny's death, than listen to stories of physical assault and rape.
It can be traumatizing for the therapist if they aren't ready or trained for it.
And I suspect even for the competent, empathic and professional therapists
it can be traumatizing. Taking home the job kind of thing. That's why it makes
sense for the rates they charge. Really again, for me it's way better that spending
more time and expense at the doctor's office.

Without good therapy, I found it almost impossible to engage in good self-care.
Poor self-care means that I'm physically sick. Good self care for me is fairly
involved due to the prolonged nature of the trauma and attacks I endured in the
middle of the night whilst asleep. Without diligent self care I've been essentially disabled with physical symptoms and ptsd symptoms.

Therapy to me is like going to the doctor. Essential. But despite many having
such positive experiences, which is great, for many of us with PTSD, quality
competent care is more of a rarity.