Auditory Flashbacks? Anyone?

[zaniara]

For periods I have a lot of auditory flashbacks. The "pictures" I can somewhat "stop"; but not the auditory flashbacks! I think they are the worst sometimes.. They make me wanna puke.. (dont even want to talk about them a lot, but some of them are words the abuser spoke.. :() My therapist told me that the sense of hearing is the most difficult to "close out" during traumtic events.

 

[safenow]

I have certain auditory flashbacks that drive me right up the wall or under a car or desk. One would think after all these years they wouldn't bother me any longer, but now there are methods used to silence them for people. I've never taken those classes because I don't want to start that process again. It always incapacitates me for days and sometimes weeks. And I have enough going on, you know what I mean.

I must admit the sound of man hole covers no longer has me hit the deck. And a car backfiring doesn't send me under tables anymore. So that's good.

 

[reckoner]

Periodically throughout the day, usually everyday, and almost always before I go to bed each night. Usually it's a very matter of fact "I'm going to f*ing kill you tonight." paired with visuals that seem to be burned into my minds eye. I'm used to it at this point - it always affects me, makes my heart beat faster, but it doesn't shock me anymore... it's just there.

 

[just me here]

I wake to the sound of a car accident. I never remember a dream about anything related to driving that leads up to it, it interrupts my dreams or just happens without a prelude, I am suddenly awake with the echo of ripping metal and heavy impact ringing in my ears.

I remember years ago I would feel the need to get up and search my house and take a peek out the window at the street to assure myself it wasn't real, now I just rollover and try to calm myself down using meditation techniques.

Interesting to me that when there is a real crash in the middle of the night, I know it as real and check on it without any doubts that it was real. A few years back we had a heavy ice storm that coated the house and the snow on the ground with a half an inch of solid ice. In the middle of the night the Ice that was formed on a skylight let go, sliding down the roof and landing on an inverted cattle water trough (we use it for a wading pool in summer and turn it over for the winter to keep it from filling with rain and snowfall), the resulting sound was like ten hammers pounding on ten steel 50 gallon drums and I knew right away something had really happened. No adrenaline, no fear, no feelings of impending doom, just a wake up to the sound of a real crash.

the "hallucinatory" crash affects me deeply, but the real crash just wakes me up and leaves me pretty much calm, just curious as to the cause.

 

[belong to live]

Mine is a slightly different perspective.After my workplace accident when I was crushed by a steel door I would hear sounds that would cause me anxiety,stress and fear.The door made a loud bang when it struck me although I don't remember it falling on me.It knocked me out as it hit me on the head.
After I would have the anxious,stressful and fearful feelings but it wasn't until I was diagnosed with PTSD I realised that these were psychological 'triggers' for me.
A balloon popping... a car door slamming...metal screeching sounds etc etc

After I recognised my triggers(or some of them,there may be more) I still had the feelings but there was the beginning of relief and the fear has began to lose it's power.

 

[safenow]

That is why it's so important to know your triggers. I recommend you write down anything that makes you feel yuck in a journal. Any of the 5 senses. When the hair on the back of your neck goes up, pay attention to what you just heard, saw, smelled, felt, or tasted. Write it down. When you get goosebumps, that feeling in the pit of your stomach, you jump, or whatever it is. Pay attention to the senses of what you were doing and felt, etc. When my therapist had me do that, we came up with over 1,000 different triggers. He and I worked very hard on neutralizing them. I still have some, but only when they are in combination do they set me off to negative things.

Good luck.

 

[Doolali]

Glad to hear these can be worked on safenow. I find my PTSD very tiring to say the least, still living by an internalized set of rules from my childhood..some forced on me and some developed by me as a way of coping/controlling my situation. These are way more extensive than I imagined as I am uncovering the full 'list' with my therapist. The flashbacks are hard and figuring out what triggers them is very tough. You never forget anything, even if it seems like it's not consciously remembered. I am surprised at some of the triggers we have worked out so far!

Stay strong everbody :)

 

[samson]

I have such an aversion to any sort of pounding, or banging. Especially on doors or windows. I had a nightmare the other night that someone was banging on both of my bedroom windows from the outside. My old sociopath boyfriend used to bang on the window to wake me up in the middle of the night so I would let him inside.

The other day I was walking into my office workroom and I heard this noise that literally scared me so bad that I froze and asked my friend what that noise was. About that time I realized that it was the janitor cleaning the toilet and tapping the brush against the inside of the bowl. Yikes. I feel like such a freak sometimes.

 

[safenow]

I think most of us feel that way from time to time, samson.

If I'm in a store and someone drops a box, I practically wet myself. It scares me so bad. I expect to hear gunshots ring out immediately afterwards. Backfires do the same thing. I've been known to get under tables at restaurants because of backfire. My ex-husband put a contract out on me and I was shot at several times over a period of time.