Autism, Aspergers Syndrome and Common Misconceptions

[Nicolette]

Pandora, motherhood is hard at the best of times. As a mother I have times when I think I am to harsh on my son but then I look around and he's not wandering the streets getting into trouble like others his age. I think a level of discipline is necessary in raring any child.

I think you do a wonderful job. Remember that children do not come with a manual so all we can do is the best we can with what we do know..... which is exactly what you are doing. :smile:

 

[pandora]

Thank you Evie and Nicolette...thank you both for reinforcing what should come automatic but those negative thoughts sometimes do take over...

My son is completely and totally honest with me and he generally comes to me with anything.......he tells me everything, and it is open and honest. The counsellor told me I tend to communicate for him....something that justs come naturally now, I know him so well. I know I have to just take one day at a time...he is going to grow up one day and I will look back and miss these days!....well maybe...

 

[catjudo]

I also think that there are some people who are way to SENSITIVE these days/ The strange part is that these "sensitive ones" are not even a part of the issue. That has always confused me. Why get upset when something does not even concern you?

On a forum such as this, where you don't know the people you're communicating with and therefore don't know everything about them, how are you to know whether or not someone is a "part of the issue"? How do you know if something is of concern to an individual or not? If they say it is of concern to them then you have to take them at their word, do you not?

 

[tardis]

Great point catjudo. When I joined the forum, I admitted right off I had Aspergers in addition to the PTSD, I reckon because the two are closely connected for me. I was surprised as soon after that I began getting PMs from several people, some had a child, or a sibling, or a friend with Aspergers or autism... a couple even had Aspergers themselves. But they were too shy to reveal it here. Its true, you don't know who your chatting with, or what their private concerns might be.

 

[Grama-Herc]

OOPS! ! !

LOOKS LIKE MY POST WAS MISUNDERSTOOD ANDTAKEN WRONG SORRY!

I am not even going to try and explain what I meant because it might just blow up into another mess so we will just

LET IT DROP ! !

Just know that I meant no harm or to hurt anyone. Sometimes I have trouble turning my thoughts and feelings into words

 

[tardis]

Fair enough Herc, no harm done. :) I have the same troubles with getting my feelings out properly. And personally I wasn't offended in any event. Just commenting is all.

 

[Grama-Herc]

Tardis

You are one of the coolest kids I've ever met except for Evie. You guys are a matched set and should be very good together. I admire your outlook and freedom to express what you feel.

Many men much older than you do not have your wisdom! Kudos to you

 

[Yumeko-chan]

Ah, this is what I get for not coming more often, lol. I missed this wonderful topic!

I have Asperger's as well (though the one doc I saw in college preferred to label me as PDD-NOS, as he didn't have my info from when I was little). Lately I haven't really been able to tell if what I'm feeling is just my Aspie self rearing its head, or if it's part of my PTSD flaring up. Maybe a little of both.

I get told I'm too sensitive, I need to lighten up, I'm exaggerating things (or flat-out "remembering them wrong"), etc. etc. And of course it doesn't help that my own b/f says that if I ever had kids they'd be "retarded." I want to believe he's joking (I'm sure he is, but...), because I can't stand it when he says that. Most of the time I just try to retort that they'd probably be bald too (he's my age but his hair is thinning big-time) =P

I have many tactile issues. I always had to have the tag cut out of my shirt when I was younger, as it drove me nuts. Couldn't stand wearing jeans 'cause the denim was always too stiff (fortunately I have found some I like, and I wear the heck out of them). Never ever ate green vegetables (again, didn't like the texture), and only in the past few months am I learning to eat them and actually tolerate them. I do NOT like clingy clothes at all (probably as a result of that I didn't even start wearing a bra till ninth grade). Lace bothers me. I find the smell of peppermint too sharp. I could go on and on.

With my touch issues you can imagine what it was like getting molested for three years. And you can bet he knew about me being an Aspie too. Argh.

On the flip side, I love the feel of cashmere and chanille. I love the feel of a cat's fur. I love being wrapped up in a soft blanket. I love the smell of cinnamon and of cookies.

 

[batgirl]

Lately I haven't really been able to tell if what I'm feeling is just my Aspie self rearing its head, or if it's part of my PTSD flaring up. Maybe a little of both.

I'm an autie and I really relate to this. I've had many times when I don't know which disorder to attribute symptoms to... or maybe its a combination like you say. I suppose I am "lucky" though in that my major trauma didn't occur until I was 17, so I had all the years before that to compare with how I am now at 25. Still, for some stuff its confusing. Though now I just try to tell myself it doesn't matter where its coming from.

And of course it doesn't help that my own b/f says that if I ever had kids they'd be "retarded." I want to believe he's joking (I'm sure he is, but...), because I can't stand it when he says that. Most of the time I just try to retort that they'd probably be bald too (he's my age but his hair is thinning big-time) =P

I don't think you're being sensitive in this case. This is your boyfriend, not just some random person whose opinion doesn't matter. Even if he's joking, I'd be tempted to kick him for saying something like that. I really like your retort though, its funny and a good attitude to have. And you're right, he has the baldness gene haha, and how does he know he doesn't have a bunch of other special-ness in his own gene pool??

I have tactile issues too, I can't wear anything tight or even remotely scratchy, have trouble with jeans and bras, and certain foods. Strong smells such as paint really bother me. When I was little my father couldn't take me to school because the hallway in our apartment building had been freshly painted and I screamed bloody murder and refused to walk down the hall. This went on for at least a couple of days and he ended up putting a towel over my face and carrying me out screaming. I still will go out of my way to avoid paint or other strong smells. Its hard to explain, but it almost hurts to smell them, its so overpowering.

I like soft things also. I have a super soft teddy bear that I sleep with and I like to feel her fur on my face, it calms me if I'm feeling bad.

Anyways I'm really glad you shared, I related to a lot of what you said and its nice to "meet" you! :)

 

[Yumeko-chan]

The crap didn't start hitting the fan in my life until I was 15, and I'm 25 now too. Still waiting for it to stop.

Oh yeah, vanilla. Can't stand the smell of vanilla. And of course that's Mom's favorite scent so she'd buy a bunch of vanilla candles. The smell makes me kinda queasy. That's the best way I can put it. Gives me that feeling of "Ugh."

When I was younger I couldn't really internalize thoughts very well, so I'd sit in my room and just talk to myself, lol. As I've gotten older I can internalize them, so now I can just space out and get lost in my own mind :rofl:

Don't like having my hair up. Makes me feel restricted. Didn't even learn to swallow pills until I was 19 because I was always afraid I'd choke. No sense of balance at all so I don't know how to ride a bike. Combine that with the fact I don't like having water in my face/eyes, so I don't know how to swim either.

I'll add more as I remember :wink: