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Awarded Arts Fellowship & Coming Out As Ptsd Sufferer...slowly

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I have my first update:

The director of the sheme sent an email with general information and also enquired about my health. I had previously told her I was unwell but only mentioned the auto immune stuff. Today I told her I have CPTSD and that I was reluctant to tell because it's a new process (telling) and a stressor. She came back advising me that in another role she supports someone with PTSD, has awareness of the symptoms and how crippling they are, as well as having her own experience and she wants to support me. How brilliant is that?

Of course I've got to do the footwork but to have a degree of understanding and willingness to hear and support is amazing.

Happy I can share with folks who can appreciate the significance of this:)
 
@hodge
The process has already started. I met my mentor last week, she's lovely. The session was productive.
It kicks off properly in September with seminars and then 4 day residential with the 9 other fellows..GULP!
Have you done this kind of thing, something similar? If so, what was it like? How did you manage it?
 
No, @NatBird, I haven't really, I don't think. The closest I've come was being accepted into a couple of poetry-writing classes during my undergrad years. Luckily, that was way before I came down with PTSD, but it was still pretty stressful. I was like you, had a hard time being visible, and like your situation, those classes had about 9 or 10 people in them at most. It was totally up to the instructor's discretion how many students he felt he wanted to work with out of however many applications. In such a case, you are going to be visible. The best classes of this type are run by instructors/poets who are sensitive and have a knack for constructive criticism without making students feel they are being criticized. The goal is to encourage each student to hone their talent. Such profs tend to set the tone for the other students as they critique each other's work as well.

What helped me?

-- practicing reciting my poems to my poor roommate (lol)

-- reminding myself that I would not have gotten into these classes if the instructor/poet didn't think I had talent enough (we had to submit like five poems in order to be selected for the classes)

--seeing most other students almost always being compassionate with each other when remarking on each other's work, taking the prof's lead -- and since your instructor/mentor sounds very compassionate, I think there's a good chance this will be a great experience for you
 
Nat, this is awesome! I'm so excited for you! Of course we will want to hear about your progress, and we're here for you if you occasionally stumble.

:hug:
 
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