Back Out In The World....

[Nighthawk]

I am glad you are back.... Glad you have some of a hold again.

(((((BLOOM))))

 

[BloomInWinter]

I am still struggling, but went for a bike ride yesterday.

Took my kids & a safe friend to labor day yard sales...very hard for me. But I did it.

Had a friend over last night. Went for a bike ride yesterday.

I think I'll probably always struggle to be 'out in the world' but am finding I am safer in myself.

Healthier boundaries, healthier sense of self = easier to not worry about what the world thinks.

 

[BloomInWinter]

I drove myself to an annual 'fall drive' thing I've wanted to do for over 2 decades. I went by myself after asking 3 friends to accompany me....all three had other plans or were too tired, but I went anyway.

Every time I began to feel scared....I kept telling myself I had my phone, I had resources....I put the 'capable adult me' in charge of all the fragmented scared parts and let them comfort each other. Sounds so dumb but....it WORKED! It was exhausting....fun....sad, too, as I went to flea market after flea market, and saw so many items that reminded me of my childhood & long-gone family.

I got many items for several works I'm going to do over the winter. ...and, I realize, I recovered a LOT of normal memories, some good.

There were tons of smokers, and now, cigarette smoke is just unpleasant....no longer the rage trigger it once was.

Am grateful I finally accomplished this drive that I always was 'going to do someday....'

 

[Jaybird3939]

Bloom,
You HAVE to be so proud of yourself! I am one of those kinds of people who associate smells, places,sounds with good or bad memories. I avoid a lot of places because of that. You were so brave to overcome your fears and especially go out and do it on your own. You deserve a pat on the back, a thumbs up, a high 5 and a fist bump for achieving all that you did. Go get some rest and sleep tonight on a job well done!
Janine

 

[KP the nut]

T helped me understand that acceptance is a key to healing. I accept that I am not perfect, that I shake and become overwhelmed by certain situations and I am ok with that, like you I am using the tools and techniques taught by both him and from what I have learned here.

Complete change of heart, bloody rollercoaster. No I'm not OK with that, I try and try and try but I'm now tired of failing.

 

[BloomInWinter]

((((((KP))))))) (((((((brat17))))))) (((((((Lizio)))))))) (((((((Deb)))))) ((((((Jaquie))))))) & all my wonderful (((((((forum friends)))))

Am dealing. In the world, as the world is.

I don't like most of the world. But I do love my family....and all of you.

 

[Tinyflame]

Same Bloom (((((((((Bloom))))))))))
:inlove: xoxoxox

 

[AngelaMarie]

(((Bloom)))

 

[MsPositive40]

Way to go Bloom,
You are truly an inspiration to me, Im so happy for all your accomplishment. I was a little depressed tonight but after reading your story you put a Big smile on my face! Thank you, and keep up the good work :tup:

 

[CraftyCath]

Just found this thread Bloom. I am so proud of you...way to go girl! You will get your ups and downs but it will level out.

 

[Deaf Global Nomad]

Congratulations, Bloom!!!

You are definitely my inspiration as I work hard in therapy as well as with my various service providers. Luckily, Bright will always be by my side while I practice.

Thank you for guiding with a main focus! I am grateful that my profession of choice is being a university professor. I choose that as my primary focus, as I do not have children or a relationship to juggle. Teaching will be enjoyable as well as working one on one with students. Conducting research and writing can happen in wherever I decide to set up my refuge, my office or home, or both.

That is a wonderful idea to give yourself time when crashing is ok. When I am off of work I can crash, exercise, hike with Bright if he is still around, go camping, read, maybe watch movies, and relax.

Thank you for being such an awesome role model!

 

[Britt.f7]

But the idea of being in the world doesn't prevent me from being in the world.

Am hopeful someday, it won't feel so hard.

Are you still able to do this? Did it get easier? I haven't been able to leave my house for a couple months. I've always had some form of social anxiety but it has gotten worse. Any tips? Thank you.