Bad Habit

[Casey_03]

For as long as I can remember, I've had a few really unhealthy coping mechanisms -- drinking, smoking ..... and shopping. I've stopped drinking and smoking, thankfully, and would like to keep it that way. But I still find myself doing compulsive online shopping when I get really anxious or upset about something. When my mom died years ago, i remember one of the first things I did was go out and blow hundreds of dollars on new clothes. It was pretty obvious to everyone that that's how I was dealing with her death. Healthier than abusing alcohol, but still not a good habit. I've made a lot of progress since then and am nowhere near as bad about it. I don't spend large amounts now (20$ maximum) and it usually only happens once a month, but I know I have to stop since the baby is coming and I need to save all my money for him and his needs. Sometimes I also find myself buying little things that I absolutely do not need (like nail polish) and I realize that for me it's a form of therapy. It's a compulsion. I get depressed, stressed or anxious and in my head I decide that I need to buy something for myself, when in reality I can do without it. I'm wondering if anyone else has struggled with compulsive spending when stressed? If so, how did you get it under control? I'm much better than I used to be, but I still end up feeling guilty for spending 20 bucks.

 

[Killashandra]

I had a spending problem. It was bad enough that I would spend my limited income on frivolities and then use the food bank to get our staples for the week.

I was basically cutoff from spending. I stopped "window shopping" and "bargin hunting" I reduced the amount of time I was within shopping distance. Alsowhen grocery shopping I took a calculator in and added up as I went to ensure that I didn't go over my allotted quota. I was also repaying an overdraft on my account. was like giving up smoking.. such an addiction. At first I used the rubber band technique to stop those triggers which made me want to spend then after a few months of vunerablity and effort, I found an intriguing joy of watching my bank balance and savings grow.
Now I have loosen the grip slightly and can spend a few dollars on things I need. Not want.
Also as horrible as it sounds I use my friends problem spending to encourage me not to do it again. Like a reformed smoker. I sit there and listen to what she bought and why she bought it.. and wonder how she cannot see what she's doing. ..
Basically if I don't need it I don't buy it. Unless it's my hobby.. music,movies and books but I don't go crazy and buy something each week.

I have other destructive coping mechanisms but it's encouraging to know that one is down.. only a few more to go.. so don't be too hard on one $20 spend when you've given up two major coping mechanisms so good for you!
I hope this helps. But that's how I managed to stop spending .