surviving_it_all
Silver Member
So, I waited to do my creative writing reading until this morning. The story though short was about a mother who killed her child. I should have known it would be bad because I kept going somewhere when I was reading it. It was too much. I feel super anxious.
People around me never believed or even labeled the spanking my Mother would give us as abuse. There was blood. The hangers she'd use though plastic would tear your skin leaving little tiny open marks that would bleed and stain your pants. There were scratches mostly to your neck where she would dig her nail in deep and leave a gash. The first time I remember being hit when I thought I did not deserve it, I was like four or five. I had cut my toe and needed stitches. She hit me with a hanger on the way to the hospital. I couldn't even fend off the swings because my toe was hanging off. The blows to the head, smacking in the face, and punching in the face was never really called out by anyone. She would squint at you, and it would come. It feels so humiliating to be punched in the face in front of neighbors and friends.
I hate being triggered to easily. My throat feels like it will close up. I just want to focus on my breathing for a while. Slow even breaths. Why does this happen at the worse of times?
People around me never believed or even labeled the spanking my Mother would give us as abuse. There was blood. The hangers she'd use though plastic would tear your skin leaving little tiny open marks that would bleed and stain your pants. There were scratches mostly to your neck where she would dig her nail in deep and leave a gash. The first time I remember being hit when I thought I did not deserve it, I was like four or five. I had cut my toe and needed stitches. She hit me with a hanger on the way to the hospital. I couldn't even fend off the swings because my toe was hanging off. The blows to the head, smacking in the face, and punching in the face was never really called out by anyone. She would squint at you, and it would come. It feels so humiliating to be punched in the face in front of neighbors and friends.
I hate being triggered to easily. My throat feels like it will close up. I just want to focus on my breathing for a while. Slow even breaths. Why does this happen at the worse of times?
