Childhood Blame

[LucyLou]

I was sexually abused by my 2 brothers when I was younger. I don't remember the ages it started (maybe 10/11?) and stopped.
Memories are vague.
I don't remember saying no, telling them to stop or trying to shout out.

 

[somerandomguy]

You may not have said no or told them to stop. You might have been completely silent.

You know how much that makes you at fault for being sexually abused?

Zero. It makes you zero at fault. It wasn't your fault whether you screamed bloody murder or whether you stayed silent as a mouse. You are not to blame. No one is to blame for their own sexual abuse.

The ONLY blame lies with the abusers. Not you. Not ever.

 

[LucyLou]

Thank you for that, I actually really needed to read something like that.
I don't know why I keep blaming myself :(

 

[internal]

blaming yourself is sometimes easier than realizing that things can happen to you which are entirely out of your control. i have often said that sometimes when i look at the things i have said, it feels like i want it to be my fault. that i go through these mental gymnastics to almost make it my fault. because if it is my fault that means that i chose it. and that means that i could have stopped it. and that means it wasn't random.