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Called my therapist a 'stupid motherf*cker' today...would you?

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She said others said I had come by. Not necessarily because of the worker’s compensation stuff. The usually do that when clients come by in case the therapist needs to touch base with said client if they appeared to not be doing well
 
This for me has been an enlightening thread to read. I’ve now learned about going behind the desk, being on the computer of the office staff etc. At my t’s office this would never take place. The one mystery that keeps leaping out at me is why the t cuts it so close to her appointment time. My experience with my t is his first appts are 8:30 am or 9 am. I know he is in office at 7:30am as he often returns an email to me as part of his morning routine. I’ve even seen it as early as 7:19 am. So If I were to be the first appt there is no way I’d be waiting outside for them to open the door. The area to pace, if I ever got round to that is ample. For me I come in the door, and chill in the outer vestibule before opening that next door to enter. If I’ve not quite got out of that wait area he greets me there takes me in to the secretary to sign and we head to the therapy room. His office doors are closed and no one would ever go in there as he has therapy rooms and an ample waiting area.
As to language, well ya it happens and as much as it sounds disrespectful if you get blasted unexpectedly in an appointment on issues that you didn’t see coming, since staff broke the rules, and you request a break that isn’t honoured then the break is granted then it happens because not only are you getting the unexpected blast about how you’ve handled yourself in the t’s office with the support of others, and then get told about it without a breather to take it in and explain, then the over boil can be rapid. It’s not intentional at that point, is part of the dysregulation that your trying to control by asking for a break.
 
I strive to be a very understanding person..honestly, to a fault. People have done the shittiest things to me and I’m like..okay, but I can understand why/where your mind was when this happened. That’s something I need to work on too, but the only thing that truly pissed me off about all this is the part of her bringing up confidentiality and me going behind the desk. To me that is an issue where myself (as a vulnerable client) should not have been misguided and then scolded. In that office, there is a total
“Power over, bc I am just the client”. My therapist has children and didn’t drive until recently getting a vehicle, so I can empathize with family dynamics. I can understand her bringing up the idea of not coming unless it’s on apppitment days, because I understand how it’s therapeutic for me. But telling me how the staff in the office risked confidentiality by allowing me in those spaces...honestly...not my problem.
 
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it still makes sense that if there is a problem (whether a big problem, or a series of small ones that aren’t an issue in and of themselves, but collectively need to stop) that your individual therapist would be the first point of contact, right?

I think this depends. My last therapist would *never* deal with paperwork stuff. I was *required* to talk with office staff about it, and they had no issue with me coming between appointments.

There really is no excuse for a therapist always being late to the first appointment of the day....

Completely agree with this. It is the therapist's responsibility to be on time. I had a therapist who didn't have office staff and was late every. single. time. It didn't start out this way; it felt weird and unsafe to me. If I got there on time, I always had to wait outside. My car was parked too far away to see when she showed and there were no chairs (or even a step) to sit on. When it was very cold, I nearly froze.

I found out that she was always late because she had another job. She closed her practice eventually.

Ahh thank you so much for saying this!! I was debating responding, but you’re right I never call...

Thanks for clarifying this. I didn't see it, either; I only saw that you wanted her to stop talking. If my therapist is pushing a bit on something and I can't handle it right then (usually a matter of too much stimulus, stuff going on on the outside and the inside) and I ask him to stop, he does. Right then. He knows by continuing to talk he is only creating an environment that feels unsafe to me and exerting control that's really not his to exert.

Personally, I think the majority of staff members are behaving normally and reasonably - I certainly would let a patient in 10 mins earlier if it was freezing cold outside. To me, this is NORMAL HUMAN BEHAVIOUR.

Yeah.
 
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I'm in Canada also and the staff were way out of line letting you access offices and be behind the back counter etc.
Not sure though, why the therapist would give you hell for that when it was clearly the job of the front desk staff to set those boundaries.
Also, it would confuse me too, and i would've taken the invitations to mean it's okay- even knowing it's not, when it comes from an authority figure, like the staff in the office, why would you question it?
And if your appointment is at 9 the place should be open a minimum of 15 mins early- especially in winter!
Sorry they seemed to have placed responsibilty on you for their own indiscretions. Hopefully they've been talked to about it too.
I would complain about the doors not being open early- it's a safety risk
 
I strive to be a very understanding person..honestly, to a fault. People have done the shittiest t...
Hey.. I wanted to respond earlier ( couldn't sign in.. Yada) I agree you shouldn't wait for a therapist. They are not ready for you that early in the morning, is the deal. I'd find a new therapist period. The workplace is a different scene today..Everyone needs to know they are doing well. ( babies grew up)It's up to you, really. I've told my therapist things I haven't told a soul for a lifetime. That's her job! But being late and blaming you for the office politics, is just not right.
 
If you believe that you were not responsible for any part of this situation arising or your subseq...

I’m still working on processing - the emotions that were stirred up are still pretty intense. My therapist has worked hard on building a great rapport with me, so I’m intrigued to attend at least one more session. Normally I’d quit therapy and find someone else, but I think it would be more therapeutic to try to work this out first. Aside from that I don’t really have a plan, so we will see..
 
Wow I'm so sorry this happened and I would have reacted the same as you. The problem is the therapist has no idea what happened with you and is unfortunately being asked to do something without using any clarity or knowledge or "framing" it in the right way. The therapist could have said, "our office managers and staff invited you into an office and behind their desk and they never should have done that." We want you to know why it was a mistake and why they can't help you with paperwork, etc. Or just asked you questions. How this was presented would send my issues of "POWER and CONTROL' (that is a symptom of PTSD btw) into high alert. I would have lost it. It's upsetting to me that there doesn't seem to be any compassion coming from the office staff. Shouldn't they understand they are in a mental health clinic and their customers will have high levels of anxiety and need to cope by walking or being alone? What a bitch this assistant manager is! Hopefully, you can explain that your reaction of cussing and telling her to stop talking (WHICH SHE SHOULD HAVE STOPPED TALKING!) was in a triggered state. I would explain all you did here, and let the therapist know why you had a strong reaction. (I would have had the same reaction!) I think they should fire that assistant office manager! She is working in the wrong office! She has some sort of power issue and sounds like a bully!
 
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