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Can't Look At People That Look Like Him

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I was raped by my cousin multiple times as a child. From age 3 till age 11, I have ptsd very bad. And it's getting worse. I can't look at anyone who looks like him. My boyfriend and I keep on fighting because I'm so emotional. I just don't have the money to go to a counselor.

Does anyone have any advice? Its eating me alive. I can't keep relationships strong right now because I'm so emotional. :unsure:
 
Welcome to the forum. You really need to seek help, even if it only from your doctor at this stage. I'm sure he will be able to give you advice and point you in the right direction.
 
I would agree with Loloma, to seek help. Also I found reading on the subject helpful for me. I couldn't list all the books I've read but there are many on the subject of abuse and PTSD that have coping skills that can at least give you a start. The basics like deep breathing skills and visualizing a safe place.

One of the things that used to help me in public was having a small round stone in my pocket that represented safety and the present time and if I felt scared I would hold onto it to remind myself that I'm in the here and now and not in the past, and that I am safe.

I'm sorry it's difficult for you right now, try to be gentle with yourself. Relationships are hard under the best of circumstances I think.
 
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