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Deleted member 46411
Hi. I’m going through a bad patch right now and have joined these forums in the hope of finding some support and solidarity.
A few years ago I had a minor breakdown after years of bottling up all my trauma without even realising I was doing it. Things have been up and down since then. I’ve learned lots of self-care and coping skills, but I still have bad patches and I’m in one now. I’m just so mentally and emotionally exhausted from it all.
I’ve had private therapy in the past but can’t afford this now and NHS provision in my area is terrible. I can use my work EAP to get some free therapy but I’m still working up to phoning them and I’m nervous about seeing someone new (I don’t exactly trust people easily).
It took me a long time to acknowledge that my childhood was traumatic, as I had a nice house and nice things. But my dad was traumatised from his own childhood and was depressed, unpredictable and quick to anger. I’ll save the details for another thread but suffice to say I grew up in a home where I didn’t feel relaxed, safe or able to make mistakes, and where children were expected to control their emotions but adults weren’t.
I’ve experienced some other traumas including CSA but won’t go into all the details now. Thanks for reading.
A few years ago I had a minor breakdown after years of bottling up all my trauma without even realising I was doing it. Things have been up and down since then. I’ve learned lots of self-care and coping skills, but I still have bad patches and I’m in one now. I’m just so mentally and emotionally exhausted from it all.
I’ve had private therapy in the past but can’t afford this now and NHS provision in my area is terrible. I can use my work EAP to get some free therapy but I’m still working up to phoning them and I’m nervous about seeing someone new (I don’t exactly trust people easily).
It took me a long time to acknowledge that my childhood was traumatic, as I had a nice house and nice things. But my dad was traumatised from his own childhood and was depressed, unpredictable and quick to anger. I’ll save the details for another thread but suffice to say I grew up in a home where I didn’t feel relaxed, safe or able to make mistakes, and where children were expected to control their emotions but adults weren’t.
I’ve experienced some other traumas including CSA but won’t go into all the details now. Thanks for reading.
