subtleomen
Bronze Member
Hello all, I am new here. I did post one other time in the medication forum about a week ago.
The brief version of my story is that I was abandoned/neglected/physically and emotionally abused from as early as I can remember in childhood. There's some kind of sexual deviance involved as well, but I am not sure that it was CSA...at least I do not remember any specific incidence of that, just a general feeling of being violated. Around age 12, I discovered drugs and alcohol and learned to self-medicate. 3 stints in rehab over the following 15 years, and finally managed to be sober long enough to learn to feel somewhat (7+ years). That, combined with marriage and becoming a father, really brought my issues forward into my own awareness.
I'm starting therapy (again) next week. This time I am really ready to face what happened to me with vulnerability, without reservation and without using the mask of perfectionism to fool myself and my therapist into believing that I am well.
The brief version of my story is that I was abandoned/neglected/physically and emotionally abused from as early as I can remember in childhood. There's some kind of sexual deviance involved as well, but I am not sure that it was CSA...at least I do not remember any specific incidence of that, just a general feeling of being violated. Around age 12, I discovered drugs and alcohol and learned to self-medicate. 3 stints in rehab over the following 15 years, and finally managed to be sober long enough to learn to feel somewhat (7+ years). That, combined with marriage and becoming a father, really brought my issues forward into my own awareness.
I'm starting therapy (again) next week. This time I am really ready to face what happened to me with vulnerability, without reservation and without using the mask of perfectionism to fool myself and my therapist into believing that I am well.