At the end of November, I posted the following "Christmas Wish List" and wanted to see where I was with that. So far, all my "wishes" have not only come to pass but have greatly exceeded all my expectations. But I know better than to believe in "wishes", I know all these blessings have come from God's grace and provisions.
I just want to say to any new people on the list, or any one still struggling in their relationships, all things are possible through Christ who strengthen us and heals us. Put your relationships in God's hands. Trust in Him to bring you through it and know His will is what is best.
Please allow me to go through my list to see my progress:
1. I want us to be married before he moves in here. I don’t want to be merely “shacking up” and going for a test run.
2. I want to take at least a couple more months of getting to know each other better before officially becoming engaged.
Nicole had previously responded to these points, and in a nutshell said it would be better to live together first to kind of "know what we're getting into". Well, she was right. I got a new job, and it was kind of trial by fire. In a way, he was kind of forced to move into my house to take care of everything while I am working 80-100 hours a week. The stress on both of us has been immense. He has been handling everything extremely well. I have not,on the other hand. I also suffer from PTSD, and the stress of everything has really made me have to pause and look at myself and my terrible behavior. I am greatful for this forum, to have brought these issues to my attention. I am learning how to adjust, and my boyfriend (who has combat ptsd) has been immensly supportive and coaching me through everything how to cope. Our relationship has certainly been challenged but is becoming stronger. We have really grown through this and strengthened our relationship. So Nicole-you were spot on as usual!
3. I want to meet his sister and his two sons. Met his sister and her husband. I've started talking to her and keeping in touch on a regular basis. She is great!
4. I want him to meet and talk to my pastors. Ideally, I would like him to come to church with me on a regular basis. My schedule is such that I work most weekends. But my boyfriend is getting closer in his relationship with God. He wants us to start going to church once my schedule gets under control.
5. I want to talk to his doctors so I understand his condition more clearly so I can be more equipped to help him with his needs and illness. Been going with him to his doctors on a regular basis.
6. I want him to be sure he is emotionally and physically ready to be in a relationship. I don’t want to put additional stress or pressure on him. He has been in the hospital a LOT and I want to make sure he is doing well and is as healthy as possible. He is WAY more stable then I am. I am the one who needs to get healthier.
7. I want him to be enrolled in a school program or have some type of definite plan or goal for his life in place. He has enrolled in school and is starting April 1st.
8. I want both of our financial situations to be completely open and out on the table.9. I want to be a little more stable in my own finances. Just when I was about to be homeless God recently provided me with a job making about $100k, and my boyfriend will be getting money from the VA to go to school.
10. I don’t want to mislead myself in thinking I can cure him or fix him or save him. I just want to be there for him in a loving, supportive, mutually satisfying, reciprocal relationship. Done. Thank you God.
Sincerely,
Dallas.
My boyfriend has been talking about wanting to move in with me and we’ve been talking about getting married. He gave me his mother’s diamond engagement ring, but I am not wearing it because we are definitely still in the talking stage.
He has been in the hospital frequently since we’ve been dating the past 7 months. Currently he’s been in the hospital now for almost 3 weeks. That is a LOT of hospital time and I want to make sure we are both well enough to handle that.
I’ve been thinking that moving in now is too early yet because there are things I want to have in place before this happens.
1. I want us to be married before he moves in here. I don’t want to be merely “shacking up” and going for a test run.
2. I want to take at least a couple more months of getting to know each other better before officially becoming engaged.
3. I want to meet his sister and his two sons.
4. I want him to meet and talk to my pastors. Ideally, I would like him to come to church with me on a regular basis.
5. I want to talk to his doctors so I understand his condition more clearly so I can be more equipped to help him with his needs and illness.
6. I want him to be sure he is emotionally and physically ready to be in a relationship. I don’t want to put additional stress or pressure on him. He has been in the hospital a LOT and I want to make sure he is doing well and is as healthy as possible.
7. I want him to be enrolled in a school program or have some type of definite plan or goal for his life in place.
8. I want both of our financial situations to be completely open and out on the table.
9. I want to be a little more stable in my own finances.
10. I don’t want to mislead myself in thinking I can cure him or fix him or save him. I just want to be there for him in a loving, supportive, mutually satisfying, reciprocal relationship.
These are the things I need to make me feel safe.
Sincerely,
Dallas.
I just want to say to any new people on the list, or any one still struggling in their relationships, all things are possible through Christ who strengthen us and heals us. Put your relationships in God's hands. Trust in Him to bring you through it and know His will is what is best.
Please allow me to go through my list to see my progress:
1. I want us to be married before he moves in here. I don’t want to be merely “shacking up” and going for a test run.
2. I want to take at least a couple more months of getting to know each other better before officially becoming engaged.
Nicole had previously responded to these points, and in a nutshell said it would be better to live together first to kind of "know what we're getting into". Well, she was right. I got a new job, and it was kind of trial by fire. In a way, he was kind of forced to move into my house to take care of everything while I am working 80-100 hours a week. The stress on both of us has been immense. He has been handling everything extremely well. I have not,on the other hand. I also suffer from PTSD, and the stress of everything has really made me have to pause and look at myself and my terrible behavior. I am greatful for this forum, to have brought these issues to my attention. I am learning how to adjust, and my boyfriend (who has combat ptsd) has been immensly supportive and coaching me through everything how to cope. Our relationship has certainly been challenged but is becoming stronger. We have really grown through this and strengthened our relationship. So Nicole-you were spot on as usual!
3. I want to meet his sister and his two sons. Met his sister and her husband. I've started talking to her and keeping in touch on a regular basis. She is great!
4. I want him to meet and talk to my pastors. Ideally, I would like him to come to church with me on a regular basis. My schedule is such that I work most weekends. But my boyfriend is getting closer in his relationship with God. He wants us to start going to church once my schedule gets under control.
5. I want to talk to his doctors so I understand his condition more clearly so I can be more equipped to help him with his needs and illness. Been going with him to his doctors on a regular basis.
6. I want him to be sure he is emotionally and physically ready to be in a relationship. I don’t want to put additional stress or pressure on him. He has been in the hospital a LOT and I want to make sure he is doing well and is as healthy as possible. He is WAY more stable then I am. I am the one who needs to get healthier.
7. I want him to be enrolled in a school program or have some type of definite plan or goal for his life in place. He has enrolled in school and is starting April 1st.
8. I want both of our financial situations to be completely open and out on the table.9. I want to be a little more stable in my own finances. Just when I was about to be homeless God recently provided me with a job making about $100k, and my boyfriend will be getting money from the VA to go to school.
10. I don’t want to mislead myself in thinking I can cure him or fix him or save him. I just want to be there for him in a loving, supportive, mutually satisfying, reciprocal relationship. Done. Thank you God.
Sincerely,
Dallas.
My boyfriend has been talking about wanting to move in with me and we’ve been talking about getting married. He gave me his mother’s diamond engagement ring, but I am not wearing it because we are definitely still in the talking stage.
He has been in the hospital frequently since we’ve been dating the past 7 months. Currently he’s been in the hospital now for almost 3 weeks. That is a LOT of hospital time and I want to make sure we are both well enough to handle that.
I’ve been thinking that moving in now is too early yet because there are things I want to have in place before this happens.
1. I want us to be married before he moves in here. I don’t want to be merely “shacking up” and going for a test run.
2. I want to take at least a couple more months of getting to know each other better before officially becoming engaged.
3. I want to meet his sister and his two sons.
4. I want him to meet and talk to my pastors. Ideally, I would like him to come to church with me on a regular basis.
5. I want to talk to his doctors so I understand his condition more clearly so I can be more equipped to help him with his needs and illness.
6. I want him to be sure he is emotionally and physically ready to be in a relationship. I don’t want to put additional stress or pressure on him. He has been in the hospital a LOT and I want to make sure he is doing well and is as healthy as possible.
7. I want him to be enrolled in a school program or have some type of definite plan or goal for his life in place.
8. I want both of our financial situations to be completely open and out on the table.
9. I want to be a little more stable in my own finances.
10. I don’t want to mislead myself in thinking I can cure him or fix him or save him. I just want to be there for him in a loving, supportive, mutually satisfying, reciprocal relationship.
These are the things I need to make me feel safe.
Sincerely,
Dallas.
